Mama knows everything. She knows that the sudden silence of her three-year-old probably means that he’s up to something fishy, somewhere. Probably poking around with that new vase that he’s fascinated with but has been told not to touch. She knows when the eight-year-old is being bullied at school, given the fact that she’s become timid and withdrawn. She knows when the baby has been playing with his own poop. For obvious reasons.
Despite all this, kids still try and try to sneak things under their parents’ noses in the off chance that they can get away with something. Their efforts pay off, too. Because there are times when it actually works!
Because the truth is that mama – and papa – don’t actually know everything everything. Sure, they probably have a large amount of intuition about what their kids are up to. After all, they’ve known these rascals their whole lives. They have a feel for the little quirks that indicate that a certain someone is up to no good.
There are, however, inevitably some things that go under the radar. Kids can also get a feel for what their parents notice and don’t notice, after all. Sometimes they get away with a few minor things that they’ll end up confessing to their parents when they’re adults. Yet other times, they do, eventually, get caught. Because, after all, mom and dad are often one step ahead of them.
We’ve collected some of the sneakiest things that have been hidden from parents. Take these as a warning, but also as a tip as to what the cheeky little rascal is up to.
15 Love Notes
One of our friends, Ellen says that she noticed that her ten-year-old daughter began acting peculiarly every time she comes home from school. She’d go straight to her room, with an odd expression on her face. After a couple of minutes, she’d skip on out, all normal again. What’s more, for some odd reason, she cleaned her room more diligently.
Ellen supposed this was so that she, the mom, wouldn’t poke around too much. She was worried that the little one was being bullied at school or worse, so she went poking around the room anyway. To her relief, her daughter was only hiding a bunch of love letters from a boy in her class. They were still writing to each other about fairly innocent stuff, such as whether ten was old enough to be boyfriend and girlfriend, and how pretty the playground was. Ellen figured it was no harm. Besides, it kept her room clean.
14 Sweet Honey
Kids love sweets. So did Reddit user frothy_walarus, when he was younger. Unfortunately for him, his mother was, in his own words, “the biggest health nut”. This meant that there were no colas, no chips and absolutely no sweets in their house. Can anyone imagine life with even nary a cookie in sight?
Anyway, when he was in fourth grade, their class went on a field trip to a honey plant. As a perk of the trip, they each got a jar of honey. Now, he probably thought that this was his only opportunity to ever have a sweet stash. Which is why he didn’t hand over the goods to his mom. He ripped his giant teddy bear and made a whole in the back. He’d then sneak out of bed at night for the next two weeks, eating honey with his fingers, his ear pressed against the bedroom door just in case!
13 Playing Hooky
A lot of children don’t quite like school. Many children have, thus, resorted to crazy measures just to skip it altogether. Which is pretty much what happened to Allan when he was about seven years old. There were days that he’d get on the school bus but then sneak out with his best friend to either go to their house (his friend’s parents were away during the day for work) or play with spiders at the nearby river. He’d then forge an excuse letter about him being sick, doing his best to copy his mom’s penmanship.
He did get caught, one day. At the time, he was so used to his mom’s writing that he didn’t even bother to look for a reference to copy from. His excuse letter was, therefore, signed as “Mommy” which, of course, did not escape his teacher’s notice. His parents were informed and his days of playing hooky were over.
12 Mom’s Brochures
By now most parents expect their sons to, eventually, discover porn. After all, it’s readily available in accessible places such as their friends’ homes, the magazine shops and the internet. When Joe was a little boy growing up in a strict family where he could hardly sneak in a copy of Playboy, however, he still got his fix of semi-naked women. From no less than a bra brochure, too!
See, Joe’s mom was a distributor for beauty products and feminine wear so she got a new brochure each month. For a boy who didn’t have access to much else, this was a gold mine. Joe still recalls that one of his most embarrassing moments was when his mom discovered his stash of while cleaning his room. To his mom’s credit, she didn’t make a big fuss about it. She only placed them neatly on top of his bed for him to see when he came home from school. This certainly kept him from digging into the trash for old brochures – at least for a while!
11 Nocturnal Player
Another one of our friends, David, told us the story of his now grown-up daughter, Gabriela, who loved to play video games. Concerned that she was spending more time on games than her homework, David set a hard two-hour limit on her game time. She was allowed to play between 7PM and 9PM, and only after she had done her homework. Apparently, that wasn’t quite enough for the ten-year-old girl.
She occasionally managed to sneak in some game time and actually got away with it for a good couple of months. Until, that is, David had to get up at 3 in the morning to get some water, only to find her in the living room mashing the buttons of her SNES to Super Mario World. It turns out that she’d set her alarm to 2AM each night, sneak past David’s room to check if he was snoring and then play games until 5AM.
10 Grassy Secret
Children naturally get a bit curious about the things that their parents do. Clarence’s dad smoked and her mom hoped that she wouldn’t pick up the habit. In all fairness, she never did. However, that didn’t mean that she wasn’t at least a bit interested in it. One day, after her father and his friends had a good smoke in the porch, she got her hands on a cigarette stub. Curious, she opened it and found that the stuff inside resembled bits of dried-up grass.
So she did what any clever eight-year-old would do. She picked grass up from the garden, rolled it up in paper, lit it on the stove and started “smoking” it in secret in her room. She now says that it didn’t do anything in particular, she just thought it seemed cool. She did this for a little over a week before she got bored of it and stopped.
9 Bad Grades
Occasionally, a child’s misdeeds are so brilliant that the parent actually lets him get away with it. Which was the case for slicksoccaballa of Reddit, who only found out about his son’s misdeeds a camera that he keeps in his office for security. I turns out that his son wasn’t actually doing quite well at school, and the little one didn’t want the parents to know.
So what he’d do was he’d scrape the grades printed on his report card off with a sharp blade. He’d then code the grades that he wants on the computer, printing them on scratch paper a few times to make sure they line up with the blank spaces. When he’d finally get it right, he’d print it on the actual report card and poof! He’s on his way to excellence! Slicksoccaballa says he’s torn between calling the kid out on it and the fact that he’s pretty impressed with the kid’s smarts.
8 All The Chocolate
In a house full of kids, it’s no mystery as to what happens when candies go missing. Linda, herself with three kids and a sweet tooth, didn’t mind if her children got an occasional treat. However, for a week straight she was perplexed at the rate that the sweets happened to disappear in the house. The jar of chocolate chip cookies in the kitchen went from full to bare within just 24 hours. None of her kids would fess up.
One day, when she bought a couple of packs of Snickers for snacking, she hid it in the cupboard beyond her kids’ reach. It didn’t escape her that more than a couple of pieces would go missing the next few days. She found out, later, that her youngest had been keeping a stash of sweets in his room so he could have something to eat every time vegetables were on the table. He had even convinced the babysitter that it he was allowed to have the Snickers as an afternoon snack!
7 An Imaginary Friend
Through the course of history, there have always been forbidden friendships that children and teenagers alike have sought to hide from their parents. Rachel didn’t expect this to happen in modern times, however. Especially not to her own son, Cyrus. The summer the boy turned seven, he suddenly became a bit secretive. He’d hide up in his tree house, which his stepfather built for him, for long periods of time, seemingly talking to himself.
Rachel occasionally did go up the tree house to do some cleaning, she’d find that Cyrus had a stash of clothes, food and school supplies under a wooden table. She brushed this off as a quirk of growing up. When he was older, Cyrus would admit to her that he was actually hiding his imaginary friend. The game was that his friend was actually a child-pirate, hiding after he had stolen a chest of treasure from his captain. The stash in the treehouse had helped the imaginary boy “survive” his exile.
6 A Pet Snake
When Christine went out to cook breakfast one morning, she was in for a rude surprise. She found a bright orange snake slithering around the kitchen. She screamed for help and was about to attempt to kill the snake with a kitchen knife when her son came to the rescue. To her surprise, he just picked the snake up, disappeared in his room and . And then it was time for him to fess up.
Christine’s son and his friends had caught the snake about a month ago. He had been keeping it in an aquarium under his bed, catching and feeding it whatever mice and rats he could catch, since. Gathering her composition, Christine later drove the boy and the snake to a local pet shop. There, the owner identified it as a relatively harmless corn snake. In the end, the boy got to keep the snake – as long as he no longer kept any secrets from his mom!
5 Flushing Food
Quora user Ly Nguyen had an odd way of dealing with food she didn’t like. See, she had her family had emigrated from Vietnam to the United States. Back in Vietnam, here family was poor. In the US, however, her father got a relatively well-paying job and felt lucky to be able to finally feed the family well. A little too well, in fact. Ly’s parents would feed her huge servings of food and milk, hoping to fatten her up after years of poverty.
It was so much that she was constantly afraid that she wouldn’t finish her food, especially since it meant so much to her parents. Eventually, she decided to dump her food down the toilet. This, of course, made her even more guilty as she was wasting the precious food her parents worked so hard to give her. Still, she says that all she knew at the time was that she couldn’t – and wouldn’t – eat “so much dog gone food”!
4 Candy Wrappers
Another Reddit user tells the story of her friend who used to hide stuff in a five-foot hollow stump in their garage. Basically, she hid anything she wasn’t supposed to have in it, primarily candy wrappers. She wasn’t allowed to have too many sweets, apparently, but still managed to get her hands on them illicitly. Throughout her childhood her parents never even suspected and she, herself, soon forgot about it all.
Some secrets, however, just refuse to remain hidden. One day, her father decided to move the thing out of the garage. He knocked it over and out came all the candy wrappers, along with a bunch of broken dishes that she had also tried to hide. All her childhood memories were now out in the open! By the time that happened, however, she was already thirty years old! We imagine that she and her dad had a good laugh over it afterwards!
3 Arts and Crafts
Lea’s mom was a clean freak, she recalls. That made her constantly frustrated because she liked to make things that her mom considered “garbage”. So a lot of things got chucked unceremoniously in the trash. Paper dolls made from cardboard boxes. Papier-mâché bowls. Bean sprouts that she grew by keeping mung beans in between moist pieces of tissue paper. Nothing ever escaped her mom’s notice.
While all that may not seem odd things to hide from her parents, especially given her circumstances, she did hide it in the most peculiar way. See, she knew her mom didn’t like cleaning after the dog. So she hid plenty of her stuff in a cardboard box in the dog house. One day, while attempting to retrieve a doll she had made out of a sock, she accidentally dragged her clothes on dog poop! Needless to say, her mom wasn’t pleased when she came to the front door stinking!
2 Dirty Underwear
Even ten years later, James still has a good laugh at his son, Bobby’s, expense. See, when the boy was six, he took the boy on vacation to see his grandparents for the first time. As James and his wife got settled in the guest room, they left James in the living room to get to know grandma and grandpa. Later that evening, when Bobby had to change into his pajamas, James’ wife noticed that he didn’t have his underwear on.
Bobby refused to tell them where it was, at first. With some probing, however, he finally admitted that he had stuffed it under the couch. When James attempted to retrieve it, it was a stinking mess. Bobby had been too embarrassed to tell his grandparents he needed to poop so he ended up doing it in his pants! When they weren’t looking, he quickly took them off and shoved them in the first place he could find!
1 The Milk Bottle
Sometimes parents want to wean their kids off the bottle, even when the little one is not quite ready. This is what happened to Jordan, who was still asking for formula in a baby bottle at the age of five. Her parents told her, gently, that she was way too old for it and that they’d have to throw it away. That night, however, she found that she had a hard time sleeping without her bottle. She, therefore, sneaked her old bottle out of the trash and used it as a pacifier, of sorts. Just before she went to sleep, however, she stuffed it under her pillow so that her parents wouldn’t see it in the morning.
By the third day, however, her mom discovered the now-filthy nipple of the bottle still in her mouth in the morning. She had been too tired to hide it this time. Jordan had to say goodbye to the bottle but got a pacifier instead!
Sources: Reddit.com, Buzzfeed.com, Quora.com