Toddlers, they’re adorable, they’re hilarious, and they are also pretty darn destructive! For any mom who’s guilty of turning her back on her toddler for a mere moment, she knows exactly how much damage they can do given only a few seconds unsupervised.
I’ve come to learn that even in the time it takes to complete a blink, a toddler has thought up a way to destroy a piece of the house. Now I know destruction isn’t necessarily the child’s goal, a lot of it has to do with curiosity and testing their parent’s reactions. It’s all a part of growing up and this destructive phase too shall pass.
Warning, the toddlers and their messes mentioned here today are extreme cases of total destruction, so I’m hoping not to scare all mothers who have babies on the verge of reaching toddler-dom. For current parents of toddlers, some of these photos might make them cringe and might make them feel a little less alone.
I think it’s a fact that all parents must accept that their homes will remain in total and utter chaos until their children become old enough to help clean it. For some parents, that will be later rather than sooner, but let’s not dwell on it, instead, let us laugh in the face of destruction and wash our worries away as we witness these 15 hilarious toddlers on their mission to create marker mayhem!
Special note to all parents: it’s probably best to hide the markers and the crayons extremely well when those items aren’t in a direct line of sight, because toddlers will find them, and they will use them!
15 Tasty Markers
What do you do when you’re done with colouring your Elmo picture? Well you start colouring the table and the rest of you of course! Toddler logic, you gotta love it! Mommy blogger Anna Luther sure has a calm approach to it all, I need to tap into some of her Zen for sure!
Anna admits that her kiddos are still very far from knowing what “clean” means, even admitting that her kids have been known to “eat markers” from time to time. She takes everything with a grain of salt, which is perhaps how we should all view it. If we take our toddlers too seriously, we’d be crying all day long!
I love her line stating “they are precious, they are also messy, and dirty.” Girl preach, this is exactly how all parents of toddlers feel, it’s a little bit of “eww” mixed in with a whole lot of love!
14 Wall Art
The look on this kids face is just priceless, it’s a bit of a mischievous grin mixed with a guilty face, although I’m sure he doesn’t feel all that guilty about it, I don’t think toddlers can feel guilt, or if they do it’s only a mild form of it. So if our toddlers are immune to guilt, there’s definitely nothing stopping them from using every wall in the house as their personal canvas!
Terrifying to think of I know! This particular kiddo decided to go straight for the black permanent marker and drag it around the beige walls of his home. The funniest thing about this picture is how he’s just sitting slumped in front of his artwork looking like it took quite a bit of energy out of him to produce such a masterpiece.
I mean look at that darker part with the most scribbles, he would have had to use those toddler muscles and press really hard with the marker to produce that! I wonder if he’d have the same enthusiasm with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser?
13 Feeling Green
What to do when you don’t have paper or a colouring book? Well, you use your body as your canvas of course! This kid is a little older, you would think he’d know better than to colour all over himself! Maybe he was just green with envy after watching an Avengers cartoon?
I mean the Incredible Hulk is pretty amazing, who wouldn’t want to channel some of that strength, but going to these lengths to become green? It’s a little too messy for my liking. What’s even more hilarious about this picture is you can see dads leg in the corner of it, he’s just looking on, letting the little guy carry on with his colouring project.
Perhaps he got tired of reminding him not to do it, let’s face it, parenting can get pretty repetitive with the “don’t do that’s” and the “no, no, no’s” sometimes we just let the minor things slide. If he wants to colour his entire body green, then have at it kid, I guess that’s what the bath is for.
12 The New Baby Is My Canvas
Oh wow! This one is impressive; I’m at a loss for words as to what this toddler was thinking when she crafted such a “lovely” design for baby’s face? She clearly loves her new sibling, but perhaps for all the wrong reasons. Baby is not a doll, she’s also not a colouring book!
I couldn’t help but laugh at the toddler holding up her marker in victory almost as if stating “look at my magnificent work!” She’s oh so proud of herself, and this will be well documented to show her and her sister in the future for sure! I’m not sure what mom’s initial reaction was when she saw her baby covered in marker, perhaps horror, shock and then laughter?
I can only assume her first thought was “please, don’t let this be permanent marker!” The good news is that it seems like baby slept through the whole ordeal, she doesn’t seem the least bit bothered does she?
11 Partners In Crime
You can tell this picture was taken just before mom was about to hose them down as they’re in the laundry room awaiting their soap and water. They look pretty darn proud of themselves, not a hint of regret there; they had fun with all the colours of the rainbow!
I’m not really sure if one convinced the other that this was a good idea or if it was something they plotted together, but it makes for one hilarious photo that’s for sure! I’m sure their parents had a good laugh after this; I mean they did document it after all, they had to!
I love how much marker covers them, you know they spent quite a bit of time colouring each other and probably giggling the whole while. I love that they actually thought about the colours, even making sure to colour their noses a different colour from the rest of their scribbles to make it stand out. Too funny!
10 No Shirt No Problem
Mommy blogger from “Who’s Shoes Are These?” posts some of the most adorable pictures of her kids, the good and the mischievous, she shares all! One post in particular had to do with exhausted mommy and daddy sleeping in and when you have toddlers, it’s never a good thing when they get up before you!
A bored toddler is a destructive toddler, and they are oh so stealthy when they want to be! So what exactly did mom and dad find when they awoke? Maeve their youngest in a tutu and covered with blue marker. Mom admits that when things are too quiet in the kitchen it usually means someone is up to no good, something I’ve also learned the hard way.
In Maeve’s case, she knew exactly what she wanted to achieve, she was ready to play dress up, and I guess since she couldn’t find her shirt she attempted to draw one on. Makes perfect sense, of course!
9 Sorry Dad
What sort of chickenpox are these? Well thankfully, they’re not! These guys aren’t ill with unexplainable blue rashes or bumps; instead I think a bingo dabber is to blame! A bingo dabber can be just as dangerous as a marker in the hands of a toddler and twice as messy! Bingo dabbers can hold lots and lots of ink, definitely enough to cover dads whole body in blue speckles!
I guess when his son was bored with painting his own body he moved onto covering dad with blue ink and luckily for him dad didn’t seem to mind, mostly because he was still to asleep to even give his consent! Dad doesn’t look too impressed when he discovers what his son has done! Oh my, imagine waking up to this! What a disaster!
8 Make Your Own Mask
Never leave your toddler unattended while they have markers at their disposal, why you ask? Well here’s the proof in the pudding! This little girl took it upon herself to design herself a new face! Some new eyes, one orange and one green, a new red nose and some super purple lips, lipstick I guess?
This makes for a good Halloween mask, but it might be an all year mask if it doesn’t wash off! Yikes! I’m surprised this toddler was brave enough to put markers so close to her eyes and nose, especially since it’s near impossible to get a toddler to let you clean their face period! Once again, toddler logic escapes me.
This little girl is far from feeling guilty about her craft, just look at her face, she’s quite proud of her art work! Just look at the way she’s holding that green marker up, prepping for her next marker victim!
7 The Family Pet Suffers Most
Poor little Fido, he looks so miserable in his new multi-coloured coat! This is definitely the work of a bored toddler. It seems that family pets always suffer the worst at the hands of a toddler. If they’re not chased, pulled, taunted or ridden on, then they’re written on!
This poor little pup looks exhausted, clearly he tried to outrun a toddler with a fist full of markers, but what Fido doesn’t know is that no one can out run a toddler! Toddlers seem to have boundless amounts of energy, they don’t stop for a moment all day and yes, it’s absolutely believable that they chased down the dog until he gave up and let them colour all over him.
6 This Marker Smells Like Boogers
Most toddlers are terrified of having their noses cleaned, but this one has no fear when it comes to jamming a marker up there. We’ve all heard nasty stories of things toddlers will stick up their nose, I myself witnessed a toddler with an M & M stuck up their nose at a doctor’s office before, and it just boggles my mind that a kid will do that but then won’t allow you to wipe their nose! Absolutely infuriating! Am I right?
This little guy has no problem jamming this green marker up his nose, perhaps he believes it’s how you make boogers? You know with boogers being green and all? That or it’s one of those smelly markers that he really liked the scent of? Or maybe he mistook it for a smelly marker and stuck it up his nose thinking he could smell it better that way?
The possibilities and explanations are endless, we’ll never understand what exactly goes through a toddler’s mind!
5 Potty Time Doodles
Can someone say bathroom renovation? Because that’s exactly what this bathroom will need after this little guy took a permanent marker to it! I’m not sure where this kid would have hid a marker that big, or perhaps he noticed it hiding in a drawer in the bathroom, either way there is no way the parents would have let him get away with this if they had known a permanent marker was within reach!
This potty time turned expensive when this little guy decided to draw all over the walls, the toilet, the vanity and himself with permanent marker! I can hear the parents reading this slapping their foreheads and screaming “oh my god!” in terror, being ever so thankful this wasn’t them!
4 The Couch Came That Way
Oh no! Is that permanent marker? I think we’ve all been victims to toddlers ruining the furniture one way or another or much like this photo. Messy hands, markers, pens, crayons, barf, pee, poop, or whatever else they can find, usually finds its way on the couch, which is why most parents don’t even bother having nice things until the kids are much older!
This kid looks very guilty as the camera catches him in the act, it spies his very destructive scribbles all over the suede couch. There is absolutely no way that’s coming out without some serious scrubbing and even then the couch will never be the same again! Time to break out the plastic couch covers that all our grandmothers used to have, I fully understand why now!
3 Body Art
The caption says it all, they might regret the scolding from their parents but they probably don’t regret all they fun they just had covering themselves in marker. The kid on the right looks a little less impressed with herself; perhaps it wasn’t her idea at all, because the one on the left sure looks a lot more guilty, she can’t even face the accusing camera at the picture is being taken!
Too priceless! One thing is for sure when one sibling talks the other sibling into doing something it always escalates in destruction. Double trouble indeed! One minute they’re playing tea party very nicely, the next? They’re making a mess and needing a bath complete with thorough scrubbing!
To be fair, we could be looking at future clothing designers in the making! They lost their pants somehow and decided to create their own pants from their imagination, how inventive! This season invisible scribble pants are all the rage!
2 New Bedroom Decor
What exactly does it take to become known as the most mischievous toddler in Britain? Exactly what Sonny Greer has! I’ve always wondered if they gave out naughtiest toddler awards? Well, apparently they do and to the dismay of his parents, Sonny is a real winner!
His poor mother Karla Greer walked in on this catastrophe one day and decided to document it for the world to see. Sonny, now nicknamed “the wall-scrawler,” managed to get a hold of a permanent marker and not only writer all over the walls of his parents’ bedroom, but he also managed to mark up the duvet and completely cover himself with it!
I love the picture of him so casually soothing himself with his pacifier as he relishes in the mess he created. He looks oddly calm, perhaps he finds scribbling very soothing, if that’s the case, perhaps mom and dad might want to look into getting Sonny a dedicated doodle wall!
1 The Art of Destruction
Well I went and saved the worst for last, it took these kids only seven minutes to make this much mess! The mess these kids created is so extensive that The Berry decided to dedicate an entire jaw-dropping article on the mayhem and mess this house was subjected to! You’ll not only find marker, you’ll also find paint, like a lot of paint!
You’ll see that these kids like to finger paint, they finger painted walls, floors, doors and even left some lovely red handprints in the bathroom, that’s not creepy, not creepy at all!
I feel so sorry for dad Paul Schettini, who was doing so well while his wife was away, until this happened of course! What he calls “elf barf” was absolutely everywhere! He had to call up mom and let her know what happened in a matter of minutes. After mom’s jaw dropped to the floor, dutiful dad Paul took the kids and the family dog for a joint bath session. There’s not much left to do but clean and cry after a mess like that!
Sources: S**T My Kids Do, My LIfe And Kids, The Berry