When parents have their first baby, everything is brand new. First-time parents can become overwhelmed with having to take care of a new baby since they are not born with instruction manuals. Mom and dad may also be overly cautious and paranoid when they have baby number one. Every little cough their newborn makes could set off alarms for new parents because they may worry that something is wrong with their precious bundle of joy.
It may also be overwhelming for them because now they are responsible for another human life that will rely on them for every little thing. Parents may also buy all of the expensive things for their little one from diapers and clothes to their first pair of shoes (which the baby will not need until they start walking).
However, things change drastically when the parents welcome baby number two into the world. Parents need to learn from their mistakes, or downfalls, that they made or had with baby number one. Parents should then start to realize that they really don’t need to stress over every little cough and that there really is no point in buying all of the expensive things as they did for baby number one. A lot of the time, parents can use hand-me-downs from their first child to give to their second child. Why should the parents have to go all out, and bankrupt themselves, all over again? Here is a list of things that parents did with baby number one that they should never do with baby number two.
25 Waking The Baby Up To Feed
Waking the baby up to breastfeed is a major mistake that new parents always tend to make. They think that they need to keep to their feeding schedule 100% and that they need to wake up a sleeping baby to stay on that schedule. While having and following a schedule is always ideal, if the baby has finally fallen asleep, parents should let the baby rest up a little. Maybe mom and dad can get it some play time while the baby is finally asleep.
This is why when baby number two comes along; parents should just let their beautiful baby rest so that the parents can have more time to focus on their first born who is probably feeling jealous of their little brother or sister. If the parents thought that baby number was a tough job, just wait until they have to double the work to care for two children. This is another reason parents should little the newborn sleep so that they can take care of household work that has been put off for far too long.
24 Spit Up Or Throw Up?
First-time parents usually are unaware that there is a difference between their baby spitting up, and their baby vomiting. When a baby vomits, that means that it is a forceful up chucking to which their stomach contents come back up. However, generally, for babies that are under the age of one, spitting up is an easy flow of stomach contents coming up and out of the baby’s mouth.
It is a very subtle difference, but nonetheless, it’s still a difference. If a parent has never been told, or they have never researched, the difference between the two, they most like are going to be clueless until someone fills them in. If a baby is spitting up, that’s okay. It happens, and usually, there is no cause for concern. However, if a baby is vomiting a parent has to wonder why and what’s wrong.
By the time the parents welcome baby number two into their lives, they should be pros at knowing the difference. If they still cannot differentiate between the two, then they should talk to their pediatrician for some tips on how to tell the difference. Parents, don’t let confusion get the best of you!
23 The Baby Never Leaves Your Arms
For some people, never putting their baby down is a way of life and the parenting style that they choose to go with. It is something known as attachment parenting, where the parents are with their baby at all times, and usually, wear a baby sling and have the baby close to them at all times. For other people, this notion sounds quite ridiculous. Parents need a break from their child at times. This seems to be something that first-time parents are relying on because it is said to benefits the child’s relationships later on in life, along with a few other things.
However, what happens when baby number two arrives? The first born most likely has become accustomed to being the center of attention and is attached to mommy or daddy more than other children who have not been through attachment parenting. Baby number one may react badly to the loss of time with their parents when a new baby is introduced into the home and is never being put down.
A clingy baby can drive parents insane. So, parents, if you plan on having only one child and attachment parenting suits everyone needs, then that is okay. However, if more than one child is desirable, learn to put the baby down once in a while. This may make for a happier home.
22 Not Changing Diapers Quick Enough
Sometimes new parents are unaware of just how much a newborn goes to the bathroom, which could lead to the baby’s tushie not getting the frequent care that it needs. A newborn can urinate an estimate of 20 times a day on average. That is a lot of diapers that the parents are going to be running through! A newborn’s diaper should be changed roughly every 2-3 hours their first few months of life. However, if the baby is sleeping and their diaper is only wet, parents do not need to wake the baby up to change their diaper right away. It’s the number two’s that need to be changed right away.
With baby number one, some new parents don’t realize that the acid in a bowel movement could severely irritate baby’s sensitive skin and should be changed as soon as possible. As the baby gets older, the diaper changing times can be spread out more. Parents want to make sure that they are always cleaning the baby’s diaper area with wipes to ensure that they are getting clean because no one wants the baby to develop a diaper rash.
21 Nap Time – But Not In The Crib
Many first-time parents will hold their baby while he or she naps throughout the entire nap. They may sometimes fear to move a muscle because they are worried about waking the baby up. But there is honestly no reason a parent cannot place the sleeping baby in their crib or playpen for nap time. If a new parent did that, they would be amazed at the things that could accomplish while the baby is asleep; this could be anything from housework to taking a nap themselves.
By the time baby number two is born, parents should realize that movement and sound does not always wake the baby back up. Parents do not have to hold their breath in fear of the baby stirring. Parents should learn from baby number one that it is more so at what stage of the sleep cycle their little one is in, and not so much about every little sound and movement.
20 Giving Love Through Kisses
For some first-time parents, they are unaware of all the bad things that could happen to their newborn just from letting another person kiss the baby on the face. This is a major mistake that a lot of new parents make. In the olden days, it was normal for Aunt Sue to pucker up and plant a big old kiss on the newborn. However, after research and finding out the hard way, it is now established that newborns should never get kisses on their face.
Part of this is because a baby’s immune system is almost nonexistent when they are first born, and they cannot fight off all the germs and bacteria. Unfortunately, there was a post that went viral on Facebook regarding a baby getting the herpes virus from being kissed on the face by someone who had the virus.
So, mom and dad, don’t learn things the hard way. If, as parents, one let people kiss their first born on the face, don’t make the same costly mistake again. Learn from other people’s tragedies and warn people not to kiss the newborn.
19 Fevers: To Panic Or Not To Panic
Every parent, whether it is their first child or not, usually gets worried when their child has a fever. A fever is usually a sign that the body is trying to conquer an infection within the baby’s tiny body. First-time parents sometimes jump ahead and call the doctor for every little cough, but will just try to administer baby acetaminophen or other fever reducers unless they feel the baby’s temperature is too high.
This is a major mistake if the baby is under three months old and their temperature is 100.4 degrees F or higher because this means the baby definitely has a fever and in newborns, fevers are more serious. This would be a good time to consult with the child’s pediatrician and see what they recommend. They may just tell the parents to wait and see if it gets any higher before bringing the baby in to be seen.
When baby number two is born, the parents should never make the same mistake of just dismissing a fever in a baby younger than three months. Mom’s and dad’s, this is definitely a lesson that no parent wants to learn the hard way by waiting it out until the newborn is in serious condition with an uncontrolled fever. It’s better to be safe than sorry!
18 Breastfeeding The Baby Too Long
Babies only need to breastfeed for the first 12 months of their lives technically. It is recommended that parents start giving their baby solid food when they are 6-months-old because at this time their nutrient needs will be changing and they will need other vitamins and minerals, besides what’s in their mother’s breast milk.
By the time the parents first born is 12-months-old, they will be able to chew for themselves and should be eating mostly table foods by this time in their life. At this point, they will also be able to be introduced to cow’s milk. This is why mothers do not need to continue to breastfeed once their child is a year old. Their first birthday is a better time than ever to start weaning them off of the girls.
Children can start forming some memories at 3-years-old, so there is no reason to continue to breastfeed a child when they might be able to recall it later on in life. So, if a mom has breastfed baby number one for far too long, they should not make the same mistake with baby number two.
17 Pushing The Binkie
For many parents, when they have baby number one, they can sometimes tend to rely on pacifiers to soothe their baby when they get fussy in between feedings. Or sometimes even when the just get fussy in general. It’s so easy to want to stick a pacifier in the baby’s mouth and walk away. This could be beneficial to some parents, however, if the baby is being breastfed, some new studies have shown that giving a baby a pacifier early on that the baby may want to feed less.
Therefore, it is being said that moms should wait to give a baby a pacifier until their milk supply is fully established. This way if the baby does want to nurse less often, the mother does not risk her supply of milk and cause the baby to need to be weaned prematurely.
While the use of pacifiers can cause a big debate for people who are for them or against them, maybe when it comes to baby number two if they are being breastfed, it may be beneficial to just stay away from them all together. A baby will never miss what they have never tried!
16 Always Adding An Extra Layer
When parents have baby number one, they can sometimes tend to over layer their little one. This is especially true during the late spring through the summer months. The only time a baby needs more than one layer during the hotter weather, 75 degrees F and above, is if the baby is premature and has not reached the ideal average weight range. Some parents tend to think that even during the summer months, that the baby needs more than one layer.
Over layering, the baby is a common mistake for some new parents. As well as under layering the baby during the winter, or colder months. If the temperature is below 75 degrees F, then the baby should have on an undershirt and diaper, and then be covered by one more layer such as pajamas. If going outside during the winter month, a winter suit or some equivalent would be needed to keep the baby warm outside in frigid temperatures.
By the time baby number two arrives, parents should not be making the same over layering or under layering clothing mistakes anymore. If a parent is ever confused by what to dress their baby in they could always do some online research or ask another parent. However, after going through this ordeal with baby number one, most parents will do just fine, and they should not keep doubting their abilities.
15 Letting The Baby Cry It Out
For first-time parents, whenever their little one starts to get fussy and starts crying, the new parents may run right to their baby’s side. Their baby most likely knows by now that when they even just want to be held, all they have to do is cry and their mom or dad will be right there in an instant. People don’t always give babies the credit they deserve; babies can pick up on the way more than some people even realize. They know how to get what they want when they want it. Those sneaky, adorable, little buggers!
Sometimes parents just need to let their little one cry it out as long as they know that the baby has already been fed and that it’s not the time for them to eat again yet, and they know that the baby does not need a diaper change, and they cannot figure anything else out.
So, when baby number two arrives parents should not make the same mistakes, they did before and to let their second born cry it out now and then. The baby will eventually stop crying and tire their self out. However, parents should still peek their head into the room and make sure that the baby is not in any immediate danger. Safety first moms and dads!
14 Buying Designer Baby Clothes
New parents are often guilty of buying their baby the more expensive baby clothes when it comes to baby number one. They want their little one to have the best of everything! But when a person stops to think about it, why waste the money on buying a $20 or more onesie? There really is no point because babies grow so quick and their clothing sizes change so frequently. It may feel like one day they are wearing newborn clothing and the next the parents know they are already wearing clothes for a six-month-old.
Parents, unless money is an endless supply, don’t fall for the designer baby clothes! Chances are the baby will spit up on them, or make a mess in them, and then all that money spent will have been for nothing.
When baby number two comes along, don’t make the same mistakes. There are plenty of really cute and adorable baby clothes that one could buy for a fraction of the cost of those expensive little designer and name brand outfits. Plus, the parents could buy so much more with the money they will save in the long run!
13 And Overpriced Baby Shoes
When parents have their first baby, they sometimes go overboard with buying expensive things; things that are not exactly necessary at the time. Some parents may decide to buy their little newborn or even three-month-old baby expensive brand name shoes when the child is not even able to walk yet. So, let me ask parents this; why? Why buy something that the baby is not going to be able to use just yet, and by the time they are able to use them, they will have outgrown them anyway.
Once the baby is able to start walking, then that is a different story because they will be able to get used out of designer shoes (while still not necessary). So, mom’s and dad’s, learn from this pricey mistake, so that when baby number two arrives, one is able to make rational decisions about their baby’s shoe collection.
12 Shielding The Baby’s Ears
A good majority of first-time parents shield their baby from noises while they are sleeping. The new parents most likely are afraid to make any noise at all because they are terrified of waking the baby. While in theory, this seems completely logical. Noise equals disturbing someone sleep.
This is often a mistake though because babies need to get used to normal household noises. Depending on what stage of the sleep cycle the baby is in, there is a good chance that normal, routine, household noises may not even disturb the baby’s slumber. However, if the baby is in a very light sleep, something as simple as a cough or sneeze could wake the baby. It is always good to get the baby used to normal household noises because this way the baby gets accustomed to the noises within their home and a better chance at sleeping through certain sounds instead of getting startled.
So, parents, when it comes to baby number two, don’t try to shield them from every little sound during their nap or sleep time. Especially since the baby will have a noisy brother or sister making a lot of noise at times. Let baby number two get used to the natural sounds of their home.
11 Never Saying No
When a parent has a baby for the first time, that child usually tends to become pretty spoiled because parents want to lavish their first born with all the best stuff. They want their child to have everything that they need and want, plus some. Sometimes a mom and dad just need to learn how to say no once in a while.
This could become problematic as the child gets older and starts to realize that they can get whatever they want by batting their beautiful eye lashes at the parents and saying please. The child will come to expect to get what they want and throw tantrums if they don’t get what they want.
So, mom and dad, do one’s self a favor and learn to say no by the time baby number two arrives. It will make life so much easier. Children need to hear the word no in order to learn early on that they cannot, and will not, always get what they want in life.
10 The Baby Is Never Left With Anyone But Mom
Far too many paranoid first time parents will refuse to leave their baby with anyone other than themselves. This can complicate life, especially if the mother or father has to return to work. Newbie parents sometimes worry a bit too much and fear the worst-case scenario when it comes to leaving the baby with a babysitter, or another family member. In a sense, it gives the new mom or dad separation anxiety.
It is understandable that parents don’t want anything to happen to their child on someone else’s watch, but there is a difference between being cautious, and being paranoid. Leaving the baby with a grandparent, or trusted relative or friends can be a good thing. It is getting the baby used to other people other than its parents. Plus, it can offer mom and dad a well-needed break.
So, when baby number two is born, parents should be a little more at ease. If not, they should take a leap of faith and leave their child with someone else for small increments of time. Learn from baby number one and realize that nothing happened to him or her when they were finally left alone with someone. Usually, what the parents think could happen is far more worse than what is logical and more likely to happen.
9 Germs Are Public Enemy #1
Germs are everywhere, on every surface, and in every house. However, even knowing this, when parents have baby number one they tend to become overly cautious with germs. They freak out at the thought of germs getting near their precious little bundle of joy. They make people wash their hands three or four times before they even let anyone else hold the baby. While caution can be a good thing, there is such a thing as being too cautious.
If parents to have their baby live inside of a bubble to keep the germs away, the child’s immune system will not know how to properly defend itself from germs. Babies do need some kind of germ exposure to make sure that they cannot fight things off later on in life. Kind of like how they now tell people to not over use hand sanitizer because it actually does more harm than good; this is the same concept.
Babies and children are germ magnets, especially the older that they get. So, when baby number two is welcomed into this world, parents need to relax and just breathe a little bit. They should try not to freak out about every little germ because their first born was just fine and so will baby number two be.
8 Investing In The Extravagant First Birthday
First-time parents can get very excited when it comes to their child’s first few birthday parties. Mom and dad sometimes want to go all out and can get carried away with things they don’t really need. While planning a party for baby number one may be exciting, parents don’t have to invite the whole neighborhood, hire a clown, get the biggest cake they can find, or even prepare party favor bags.
While this all sounds great and like the best thing they could do for their first born, parents really need to think about it this way; how much of these extravagant birthday parties will a child under the age of three truly remember? Not much, that’s for sure. So, why in the world would a parent want to spend all this money on something that their child won’t even remember? Save the extravagance for when they are able to remember it.
So, if a parent was the type to go all out on their first-born child’s early birthday parties, don’t make the same mistakes with baby number two. Maybe the parents could put the money away for a milestone birthday such as a sweet sixteen, or so.
7 Brand Name Only For The Baby’s Bottom
When some people become parents for the first time, they are more apt to buy the more expensive, brand name only, diapers and wipes for their baby’s bottom. New parents see all of the diaper commercials on TV and think, “I need this for my baby!” The truth is, a diaper is a diaper. They all end up in the same place; the garbage. They all end up with the same bodily waste in them. So, why on earth would a parent be inclined to buy the expensive stuff?
By the time baby number two arrives, most parents realize the fact that brand name and more expensive doesn’t always mean that they are necessarily better. Babies go through thousands of diapers during the pre-potty trained stages. With the expensive stuff, parents are only paying for the name and not necessarily for better quality either. The generic stuff will work just fine! So, with all the money that the parents will now be saving in diapers and wipes, they can put that extra money to something useful or fun for their happy little family.
6 Spoiling The Baby With Toys Galore
New parents are often always guilty of spoiling their first child with the best, overpriced toys they can find. Or buying toy, after toy, after toy until there is no room in the house to store them. What parent doesn’t want to spoil their first child? But is it really necessary? Like with a lot of things on this list, just because they make it does not mean that mom and dad have to buy it. Especially when the child is under the age of three and the likelihood of their baby recalling all the toys they had early on in life is very slim.
Half the time, little ones would rather play with the box than the actual toy anyway. How many times has that happened to a parent? They buy some amazing, top-notch toy, just to have their baby play in the box. Kids are very imaginative creatures. They will not be able to pick out the difference between a $10 toy, and a $100 toy when they are young.
When baby number two comes along, parents, try to keep this in mind and remember that babies cannot tell the difference in prices or brands of toys. Was the first born able to recall any of their toys and how much they cost when they got older? Most likely, the answer will be no.
5 Every Minute Is Filled With Stress
When parents have a baby for the first time, they tend to freak out or become panicked, over every little thing. They worry about the slightest cough or sound that their baby makes if they are not too familiar with it. New parents turn everything into a big deal, and they are more cautious than they really need to be. Some caution is expected and needed, but being overly cautious can stress out the parents because they spend more time worrying than enjoying each moment with their new baby.
So, when baby number two comes along, parents should learn not to panic and freak out about every little thing that happens. By this time, parents should be accustomed to where to focus their worries, and they should know by now that not everything will harm their baby. They should enjoy their new addition to the family and treasure every moment instead of, well, freaking out.
4 Using Dr. Google Over The Pediatrician
The internet is a magical resource for first-time parents. They can find almost any information that their heart desires about parenting. However, it can have its downfalls too. Too many first-time parents will use search engines to try to figure out what is wrong with their baby when in reality, the only person who could tell a distraught parent while their newborn is running a fever is a doctor or the child’s pediatrician. Far too many times, curious parents try to find answers on their own and only end up making the situation worse.
A baby could have a mild fever, and while the parents are doing research, they may start to believe that their pride and joy has some long-forgotten virus that there are no cures for. Dr. Google is not recommended for parents, especially first-time parents who freak out over a minor cough.
So, moms and dads, do one’s self a huge favor and never use Dr. Google when baby number two arrives. Think about the panic that was felt when they thought their first born had an incurable disease all because Dr. Google said so. If a parent has questions about their child’s health, they should always call the doctor first!
3 Spending Too Many Bills On Baby Furniture
No matter how a parent looks at it, baby furniture is already expensive enough as it is. So, when parents have baby number one, they usually want to get the top of the line cribs, strollers, changing tables, and everything else that goes to furnish the baby’s room. But why pay more for something unless it has some new amazing feature that makes it worth $2,500 asking price? All that expensive baby furniture will be outgrown in no time and will either be thrown out, resold, or placed in storage for whenever the next baby is born.
However, not all parents plan on having baby number two and will get rid of the baby furniture that they spent a fortune on. So, parents, do one’s self a favor and skip out of the extravagant furniture. Learn from baby number one that there was not much of a difference between the $500 crib and the $2,500 crib.
2 Changing The Pace Of The Home
When parents have a baby for the first time, they change up so much of their life to accommodate the baby. The parents may change every little aspect of their home life, throwing out what was once normal to them. When the baby is napping, parents might try to freeze everything to keep sounds away from the baby in fear of waking him or her up. The parents may get rid of beloved pets in fear that the baby and Spike, the loveable family dog, may not get along. They may also pause their life, switch their schedules to accommodate whatever schedule the newborn wants to be on.
While some changes do need to happen, parents should not switch every little aspect of their home life. There is no need to get rid of Spike unless he’s aggressive. Sticking to a schedule is going to be more important than ever when the baby arrives because they need structure in the life. Parents should freeze while the baby is napping because getting them used to sounds is a good thing.
So, when baby number two is expected, don’t drop every little thing in life. Learn how baby number one was, and recognize that schedules are good; pets can be good, sounds are good. Don’t make the same mistakes twice, parents.
1 No Confidence In Parenting Decisions
First-time parents often lack confidence in their parenting decisions. They are always second guessing themselves, even if they logically know that what they are doing is the right decision for their little one. New parents get anxious and worry that they will be making the wrong decision. There is no real instruction manual for babies, so parents often have to go by what their parents or other parents tell them and by their own parenting instinct.
Confidence in decision making will come with time. It will not happen right away. So, moms and dads, by the time another baby comes along, one should be more confident in their decision making. However, if their first born is substantially older than baby number two, they might start to second guess themselves with a newborn all over again. Don’t make that mistake mom and dad, baby number one filled the parents head with so much doubt, and everything turned out just fine.
Sources: drugs.com, americanpregnancy.org, peciouslittlesleep.com, healthychildren.org, babycenter.com, attachmentparenting.org, kellymom.com
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