How do I get him to see he is hurting me and killing us and that all he has to do to fix it is work?0 1 month ago by Kayla333
I am 22 and work full time all the time, and am currently seeking another part time position, while pregnant, all because I am saving for baby, paying the bills, and supporting myself and my BD. I love him more than life itself, but I am really scared. Neither of us have help from parents or etc and I am completely doing it all by myself. His mother provides a destructive living environment, so if I tell him he has to leave our home until he finds a job, he will never find one for sure because she supports the fact that he is a 22 year old grown man who won't work and is always making me the bad guy for "nagging" and 'not letting him relax before baby is here'. Damnit this is NOT the time to relax. I mean, it should be for me considering I feel like I have quite enough on my plate, but I am not relaxing and am getting quite frustrated with him doing it. I don't wanna raise this baby on my own, financially, emotionally or otherwise, but I also don't wanna continue to loose weight while pregnant because I am overly stressed about how we are gonna make this work. Someone, anyone, who may have some insight, please help me. I dont know what else to do. I know the economy is rough out there, but if myself and millions of others can find jobs, he can too and I feel more lost now than ever.
I left my babys dad for simaliar reasons and come to find out best thing I ever did because he is not devoted to being a father but each situation is different...
Who is going to babysit so you can work once the baby arrives? Maybe reminding him that his only other option besides finding a paying job will be for him to be the main care giver for the baby while you financially provide for the family.Yes the economy s***s and part time minimum wage jobs is mostly what is available so it takes awhile for dedicated job hunters to find something decent. He is running short on time to man up :(
Be totally honest with him. He's a grown man, who needs to take part of the responsibility for your family. The further along you get, it's going to be harder to keep up such a fast pace. Plus, you're going to have maternity leave and aren't going to be able to work for a few weeks after the baby comes. Now is the time for him to get a reality check.
Tell him exactly what you wrote here. Let him know that he has a child coming and that child is going to need things and it's his responsibility just as much as yours to provide for that child. He will either man up or may or may not catch get angry when you tell him this and then still not get a job. If it's the latter, I'm sorry you know what you're dealing with and it's time to let him go live with his mom. When the baby is born file for support. I know you said you don't want to be a single mom but it's no point struggling putting yourself in the position where you're struggling to take care for your child, yourself and a grown man that is using you. You will become quite miserable. Best of luck!