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Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
Mar 23rd '12
Quoting mommie2b2three:):" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"

My siblings are jealous that they weren't given up for adoption because our birthmom was a drug addict. But even before I knew that, I never felt bad about being the one who was "given away" because I had an amazing childhood.

Lady Blumensh9 33 kids; Yachats, Oregon 1524 posts
Mar 23rd '12
Quoting mommie2b2three:):" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"

I was adopted into the family while my brothers were taken by the state years afterwards and I always felt a little lost, I mean my brothers and I hardly know one another so it is kinda awkward, especially now that I have my daughter.

snglemama 4 kids; Georgia 11978 posts
Apr 14th '12
Quoting CottonCandyVodka:" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"


not the same situation, but I resented my birth father for a long time for remarrying and having more daughters with his other wife, and yet he didn't fight for me. My birth mother gave us up for adoption, and he didn't even show up to court to ask for us.

I ahve a friend though who's sister was given up for adoption to her aunt.. and they all knew adn were best friends.

ANT0911 18 kids; Oklahoma 9608 posts
Apr 26th '12

I was adopted by my dad(stepdad) when I was 11 because my sperm donor didn't want me. I have to say his decision to sign over his rights was a good one because my dad is the best dad anyone could ever ask for! He's been a better father to me in 9 yrs then my sperm donor has ever been within my 20 yrs of life.



My mom put my oldest brother up for adoption and we finally met a few yrs ago but he doesn't stay in contact because of his wife. :( she doesn't like the fact he met his birth mother and family. We all connected so well but once he got married his wife took over.:(

Lorilydell87 1 child; Georgia 563 posts
Apr 29th '12

Hi I was adopted at birth. I found out by accident about my adoption when I was 6 years old. To be honest, it's been a struggle most of my life. My a parents felt that I didn't have legitimate reasons to want to find out aboutmy b-family and swore I couldn't handle it. For the most part they were good parents. The had two pahses where my life was a living hell at home. No matter how many questions i asked, i never got answers. Just lies. It hurt me so bad. Well last october, I found my birth mom, found out i have a brother and also came in contact with my b-dad. Reunions has so far been easier than i expected. My b-dad is a little creepy and weird.



Knowing my full story has been able to slowly fill that missing piece back up. I feel more at ease with my adoption now and am grateful for it. My b-mom is like talking to an old friend.



Miraculously, after 3 years of fertility issues, a month and a half afteri discovered my roots, I became pregnant :) It's like it was God's plan for me.

Lorilydell87 1 child; Georgia 563 posts
Apr 29th '12

Also I'd liek to add, that when searching for b-fam, i cam across this amazing adoptte forum /support groups. Seriously this is way better than any counseling that i've ever gotten.



No-ones judgemental. They listen to your stories, give helpful advice and many helpful and encouraging words. It was nice to know that I wasn't the only one who had tough moments due to my adoption. I feel normal now and I am able to ger more closure. Here's the link:



http://www.adultadoptees.org/



They also have a facebook page that was just started:



https://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/134430373348460/139593552832142/?notif_t=group_activity

Danielle from Maine TTA since Jul 2010; Lisbon, Maine 4 posts
May 4th '12

I was adopted at age 5!

HisIsolde 2 kids; Louisiana 263 posts
May 10th '12

My husband is adopting my youngest son. We could not be happier! The birth father passed away during my pregnancy so my husband (my boyfriend at the time) took full responsibility the moment Gage needed a man in his life and my husband never had a single doubt. We are in the process of even changing his name and I am so excited!

** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
May 24th '12

My husband was adopted by his.now dad, we were wanting to find out who his birth dad is though for medical reasons. Just don't know where to start, I mean he was never on the birth cert, so adoption papers don't show anything

** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
May 24th '12

I guess I should mention, we have nothing but his first name to go off of

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
May 24th '12
Quoting preggo_princess0713:" My husband was adopted by his.now dad, we were wanting to find out who his birth dad is though for medical ... [snip!] ... medical reasons. Just don't know where to start, I mean he was never on the birth cert, so adoption papers don't show anything"

Can you contact his biological mom?

** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
May 24th '12

Yes he wasn't given away that way, his biological mom kept him. But she is very reluctabt

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2404 posts
May 24th '12
Quoting preggo_princess0713:" Yes he wasn't given away that way, his biological mom kept him. But she is very reluctabt"

If his name isn't on the birth certificate and his mom won't tell you, you're pretty much screwed. I suppose you could talk to a private detective or something.

** 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Conway, Arkansas 3579 posts
May 24th '12

We were thinking about asking his aunts of she doesn't fork over the info. It's important to both of is so we know exactly what risk there is about any possible diseases. That and my dh decided he wanted to hear the story from him as well I guess

Lorilydell87 1 child; Georgia 563 posts
May 26th '12
Quoting preggo_princess0713:" We were thinking about asking his aunts of she doesn't fork over the info. It's important to both of ... [snip!] ... what risk there is about any possible diseases. That and my dh decided he wanted to hear the story from him as well I guess"


my a- mom wouldn't fork up any info until about a year ago. I had to call her when she was drunk...haha got the full name. I told her that I'd really like her to be a part of this with me and that it's her choice. If she chooses not to help me find my bio family, so be it. I will do it on my own..without her help. Eventhough I still had to search on my own for the most part, if i needed more info, she ended up telling me because she didnt want me to do this behind her back so to speak. That worked for me... youcould suggest trying that/



I also explained to her that it was not being done to replace her as a mother in anyway, shape, or form. This was strictly about my health and the health of my future children and also to bring closure to the whole situation. I told her that I have prepared myself for the worst and hope for the best and that I was not at all afraid of what my bio mom was/could be.