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-Ashley Nicole Due October 17; 2 kids; Clinton, Indiana 550 posts
2nd Mar '12
Quoting Ashley..:" I grew up always knowing that I was adopted, and I definitely think that's the way to do it. It was never ... [snip!] ... curious about my birthparents but I never once thought "why didn't they want me?" because my parents made me feel so loved."


:!: I agree with never keeping it a secret, although I don't have the same "loving" experience..

BuggyBoo 2 kids; Pennsylvania 1047 posts
2nd Mar '12
Quoting -Ashley Nicole:" :!: I agree with never keeping it a secret, although I don't have the same "loving" experience.."


Ya, I don't agree with it either. I was never told I was adopted and I found out on my own at 14, and I flipped out. It was not a good way to find out. I would have liked to have known. I understand why they did what they did but I would have liked to have found out earlier and in a better way. I loved my adoptive childhood and woouldn't trade it for the world, but I agree that honesty is the key in this situation.

CottonCandyVodka Due September 26; 2 kids; Louisiana 157 posts
23rd Mar '12

Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander a 4 month old well I'm pregnant with another babygirl due in September so my last daughter and this lil girl will be 9 months and a few weeks apart well anyways my SO wanted me to give it up.for adoption and my cousin that has three boys and gotten fixed really wants a lil girl badly and she wants my baby but I'm not sure if that would be fair to my daughters... I mean if I give her up I know she'll have a good life and stuff but she'll never have her sisters and I would see her all the time.. I am 24 yrs old I know I could take care of them and I could raise them together.. I'm just wondering how some of you that are adopted and ur siblings are not how does that make you feel? I'm most positive I will keep my babygirl with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2390 posts
23rd Mar '12
Quoting mommie2b2three:):" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"

My siblings are jealous that they weren't given up for adoption because our birthmom was a drug addict. But even before I knew that, I never felt bad about being the one who was "given away" because I had an amazing childhood.

Lady Blumensh9 33 kids; Yachats, Oregon 1524 posts
23rd Mar '12
Quoting mommie2b2three:):" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"

I was adopted into the family while my brothers were taken by the state years afterwards and I always felt a little lost, I mean my brothers and I hardly know one another so it is kinda awkward, especially now that I have my daughter.

snglemama 4 kids; Georgia 11953 posts
14th Apr '12
Quoting CottonCandyVodka:" Okay I have a question for those of you who have been adopted..... I have two daughters a 4 year oleander ... [snip!] ... with her birth family but I just want to know how y'all felt about being adopted and ur birth parents keeping ur siblings?"


not the same situation, but I resented my birth father for a long time for remarrying and having more daughters with his other wife, and yet he didn't fight for me. My birth mother gave us up for adoption, and he didn't even show up to court to ask for us.

I ahve a friend though who's sister was given up for adoption to her aunt.. and they all knew adn were best friends.

ANT0911 18 kids; Oklahoma 9608 posts
26th Apr '12

I was adopted by my dad(stepdad) when I was 11 because my sperm donor didn't want me. I have to say his decision to sign over his rights was a good one because my dad is the best dad anyone could ever ask for! He's been a better father to me in 9 yrs then my sperm donor has ever been within my 20 yrs of life.



My mom put my oldest brother up for adoption and we finally met a few yrs ago but he doesn't stay in contact because of his wife. :( she doesn't like the fact he met his birth mother and family. We all connected so well but once he got married his wife took over.:(

Lorilydell87 1 child; Georgia 563 posts
29th Apr '12

Hi I was adopted at birth. I found out by accident about my adoption when I was 6 years old. To be honest, it's been a struggle most of my life. My a parents felt that I didn't have legitimate reasons to want to find out aboutmy b-family and swore I couldn't handle it. For the most part they were good parents. The had two pahses where my life was a living hell at home. No matter how many questions i asked, i never got answers. Just lies. It hurt me so bad. Well last october, I found my birth mom, found out i have a brother and also came in contact with my b-dad. Reunions has so far been easier than i expected. My b-dad is a little creepy and weird.



Knowing my full story has been able to slowly fill that missing piece back up. I feel more at ease with my adoption now and am grateful for it. My b-mom is like talking to an old friend.



Miraculously, after 3 years of fertility issues, a month and a half afteri discovered my roots, I became pregnant :) It's like it was God's plan for me.

Lorilydell87 1 child; Georgia 563 posts
29th Apr '12

Also I'd liek to add, that when searching for b-fam, i cam across this amazing adoptte forum /support groups. Seriously this is way better than any counseling that i've ever gotten.



No-ones judgemental. They listen to your stories, give helpful advice and many helpful and encouraging words. It was nice to know that I wasn't the only one who had tough moments due to my adoption. I feel normal now and I am able to ger more closure. Here's the link:



http://www.adultadoptees.org/



They also have a facebook page that was just started:



https://www.facebook.com/#!/groups/134430373348460/139593552832142/?notif_t=group_activity

Danielle from Maine TTA since Jul 2010; Lisbon, Maine 4 posts
4th May '12

I was adopted at age 5!

HisIsolde 2 kids; Louisiana 263 posts
10th May '12

My husband is adopting my youngest son. We could not be happier! The birth father passed away during my pregnancy so my husband (my boyfriend at the time) took full responsibility the moment Gage needed a man in his life and my husband never had a single doubt. We are in the process of even changing his name and I am so excited!

** 19 kids; Conway, Arkansas 3576 posts
24th May '12

My husband was adopted by his.now dad, we were wanting to find out who his birth dad is though for medical reasons. Just don't know where to start, I mean he was never on the birth cert, so adoption papers don't show anything

** 19 kids; Conway, Arkansas 3576 posts
24th May '12

I guess I should mention, we have nothing but his first name to go off of

Mom.to.PoohBear 1 child; Michigan 2390 posts
24th May '12
Quoting preggo_princess0713:" My husband was adopted by his.now dad, we were wanting to find out who his birth dad is though for medical ... [snip!] ... medical reasons. Just don't know where to start, I mean he was never on the birth cert, so adoption papers don't show anything"

Can you contact his biological mom?

** 19 kids; Conway, Arkansas 3576 posts
24th May '12

Yes he wasn't given away that way, his biological mom kept him. But she is very reluctabt