Reply
My Son Started Pooping In His Pants Again...HELP! Her Milk Machine [EBF] 19 kids; Macon, Georgia 5811 posts
4th Nov '11

Well the day before yesterday, my 4.5 yr old started pooping in his pants again. He has been potty trained since right before he turned 4 years old, and he started Pre-K in August and he also has a 15 month old little sister. The day before yesterday, he had just gotten off the bus and I smelled something, so I changed my 15 month old and the 10 month old that I was also watching at the time. It wasn't them, and the smell was still there. Long story short, it was my son. I asked him if it was him, and he said no. I told him to go to the bathroom, and he did...and then he was telling me he needed new underwear because "Somebody else pooped in my underwear." Well, I told him if he was lying to me, he was going to get a spanking. He kept lying, so after his shower and getting dressed, he got a spanking AND I put a diaper on him, which I let him take off an hour later because I could tell all it was doing was humiliating him and I have the feeling that won't help the situation any. Then the same thing happened yesterday, pretty much except I didn't spank him.... BUT my husband blew it out of proportion and told him he would tell Santa not to come see him this year AND he would throw away all of his Halloween candy if he did this again. All I had told him was that the next time he did it I was going to take him to the doctor because I am scared something is wrong... Well, less than 4 hours later, he pooped in his underwear again. So again he had to shower and wash himself and his underwear out (he hates showers), and I didn't spank him this time either. Everything I read online says do NOT punish him for it. I just don't know what could be causing it!!! Then today, immediately after getting off of the bus, his underwear were checked and it was just a little "run" stain, so he was put directly on the potty. He sat there for 10 minutes and finally said "It's not coming out! It's stuck!!!" so he was put on the potty every 30 minutes whether he wanted to or not. Then after dinner, he started complaining that his tummy hurts. He NEVER says anything hurts because he is so scared of going to the doctor. I'm getting kind of worried about him... Anyone else been through this with their children? I'm in need of advice!!! I've found everything online from "My son did that and he has ADD" to "He has to be jealous of the baby." Well, I AM pregnant again (15.5 wks) but he doesn't even remember that I don't think and I'm not showing yet so I doubt that is it. And I don't see why he would be doing this because of his sister when she is already 15 mos old. I also don't see why it would be because of Pre-K when he has been in Pre-K for over 3 months now. Help?! :(

MunchkinWrangler 4 kids; Rīga, Latvia 46773 posts
4th Nov '11

Spanking him for pooping his pants!? Are you joking?
A 4.5 year old doesn't just poop their pants. Something is going on. Something abnormal and concerning... and spanking/punishments/discipline are only going to make it worse (as has clearly been proven). Obviously pooping his pants is embarrassing.. so I guarantee he's not just doing it for the hell of it. He knows you don't like it... he knows hes not a baby.



Plus, IMO.. I think 4 years old is a bit late to have potty trained, too. Is there a reason he PT'd so late? Does he do anything else out of the norm? I would talk to his pedi honestly. Not punish him. Poor kid.

Kiah:) Australia 2567 posts
4th Nov '11

I would wait a little longer to go to the doctors... its normal for children to regress.



Talk to your husband about not saying things like santa wont come or putting him down at all... it could effect his self esteem for the rest of his life.



If it happens just say its ok it was just an accident and you can go to the toilet next time. Then if its still happenning take him to the doctor or if he complains about the pain again take him

......................... Santa Fe, New Mexico 46828 posts
4th Nov '11
Quoting Her Milk Machine [EBF]:" Well the day before yesterday, my 4.5 yr old started pooping in his pants again. He has been potty trained ... [snip!] ... 15 mos old. I also don't see why it would be because of Pre-K when he has been in Pre-K for over 3 months now. Help?! :("


This isn't extremely uncommon and spanking isn't a good way to handle it. Did you ask him if he doesn't like pooping at school? And sometimes kids will poop their pants because their poop is too hard. Here is a link to some useful information.



http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/encopresis.html

The outlaws mommy 18 kids; Alabama 3228 posts
4th Nov '11

The diaper thing could really scar him. Don't scold him he's a child. Accidents happen!

Kiah:) Australia 2567 posts
4th Nov '11

Putting him down for having accidents, putting him in a nappy ect... could seriously do him some serious damage and effect him even as an adult.

Neens TTC since Dec 2008; Georgia 5578 posts
4th Nov '11

i can't believe you spanked him for that. :shock: :? expecially since it was the first time it happened. have some compassion, woman. he was probably humiliated. jesus.

Jessica♡ 2 kids; 1 angel baby; California 6939 posts
4th Nov '11
Quoting Hey, It's a Fetus!:" Spanking him for pooping his pants!? Are you joking? A 4.5 year old doesn't just poop their pants. Something ... [snip!] ... reason he PT'd so late? Does he do anything else out of the norm? I would talk to his pedi honestly. Not punish him. Poor kid."


:!::!::!::!:
Took all the words right out of my mouth.



♥ Sugar Tits 1 child; New York 5211 posts
4th Nov '11

Try talking to him and ask him why he does it in his pants.? He seems pretty embarrassed about it and scolding him isn't going to help. How often does he do #2? Also your husband shouldn't say things like that to him, it's bad enough he's pretty embarrassed about it.

thewarmth 3 kids; South Carolina 14438 posts
4th Nov '11

I want to slap the shit out of you right now.
You spanked your child for something like that and then you humiliated him by putting a diaper on him?
f**k you.

PurpleDurple 1 child; 41119 posts
4th Nov '11

Maybe he is scared to go at school? I dont think it was right for him to be spanked for having an accident.

PurpleDurple 1 child; 41119 posts
4th Nov '11
Quoting thewarmth:" I want to slap the shit out of you right now. You spanked your child for something like that and then you humiliated him by putting a diaper on him? f**k you."


Oh i love you :)

My Lil' Monsters 5 kids; 3 angel babies; Surprise, Arizona 4144 posts
4th Nov '11

spanking for pooping in his pants?
Zero common sense
putting a diaper on him?
Zero common sense
threatening with no Christmas?
Zero common sense



talking to him and trying to find out what might be causing this regression?
PRICELESS

MunchkinWrangler 4 kids; Rīga, Latvia 46773 posts
4th Nov '11
Quoting thewarmth:" I want to slap the shit out of you right now. You spanked your child for something like that and then you humiliated him by putting a diaper on him? f**k you."



I find your response appalling.

MunchkinWrangler 4 kids; Rīga, Latvia 46773 posts
4th Nov '11
Quoting My Lil' Monster:" spanking for pooping in his pants? Zero common sense putting a diaper on him? Zero common sense threatening ... [snip!] ... with no Christmas? Zero common sense talking to him and trying to find out what might be causing this regression? PRICELESS"


:!: