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My life wasnt supposed to be like this. NicoleKMK 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Killeen, TX, United States 769 posts
29th Apr '12

idk how to deal with the pain. a few weeks ago i found out i was pregnant by my ex. We had broken up I had moved to Texas because me and my ex hubby wanted to fix things. i went there with my two kids and everything was great until i found out i was pregnant. everything got messed up. my (ill just call him my hubby even though we are divorced) hubby wasn't happy because he didn't want anything to do with the child but told me i could keep it if i wanted to wouldn't help me take care of it but my dad called me everyday talking me out of it telling me how my life will be ruined. Everyone told me I would be a nobody if i kept it. i am trying to go to school so i can become a nurse and follow in my mothers footsteps who passed away a few years ago. I have two wonderful children already and i'm 21 years old. i am divorced and still need help sometimes financially from my family. It seemed like the right thing to do. I went in on the 25th and I regret it so badly now. I realized who cares what anybody else thought. I am my own person and i already am taking care of two children. What would one more have done?? I wanted to keep it and everybody knows I did. i feel like I am a horrible person and I shouldn't be allowed to be a mother anymore because i chose to give life to two and not my third. who am i to decide this? It wasn't the child's fault to be born but it was my carelessness. I am so depressed and I think I need to get some help. I am on the verge of a mental breakdown. I don't know what to do and I need advice. Please help me.:cry::cry::cry:

❀Sarah❀ 2 kids; Cocking, EU, Europe 124140 posts
status 29th Apr '12

I think all your feelings are normal but honey, based on what you wrote it sounds like you made the best possible decision for you and your kids. I know things will get better in time. I wish you the best.

Super Mommy! Pasadena, CA, United States 13903 posts
status 29th Apr '12

I'm sorry, that's a tough decision to make but it should definitely only be carried out if a woman is 100% sure in HER decision. I think you should seek professional help, someone that can help you cope with it, because you don't, and shouldn't have to live with any regret. You're not a bad person, you did what you thought was right at that time. Seek some counseling from a professional that specializes in dealing with abortions.

Yurvette [♥] 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Hyrule Castle, LZ, San Marino 36693 posts
29th Apr '12
Quoting ♡Sarah♡ +1.5:" I think all your feelings are normal but honey, based on what you wrote it sounds like you made the best ... [snip!] ... like you made the best possible decision for you and your kids. I know things will get better in time. I wish you the best."


this. I was in a similar situation as you. I hated myself for the longest time that I did it but then I realized that it was for the best. I couldnt let my life be any worse for noy living child. You did the best thing possible for your unborn and your kids. :)

Lucid Dreamer Florida 3832 posts
29th Apr '12

I know this hard to do right now but try not to feel guilty about it. It was rotten of others to put pressure on you.

IMHO 2 kids; Ontario 7746 posts
29th Apr '12

*hugs*



You are not horrible. Don't be so hard on yourself. I wish I could pour you a cup of tea and just sit with you. There are so many truly awful people in the world and you would call yourself one of them for such innocent things? No. Life is hard sometimes, and it offers up some of the hardest decisions. Things which hurt the soul.



Now, you've been through so much; don't add to it by being angry with yourself. Inside of you is a frightened little girl, just as there is inside of all of us. Imagine what you would say to her if she held her hands out to you and asked for help? Be kind to yourself.



And lastly, if you can't bring yourself out of this depression in a couple of days, I would suggest seeing a doctor for something.



Best of luck, doll. No one judges us so harshly as ourselves. Be kind to yourself.

user banned Due March 21; 1 child; Colorado 67779 posts
29th Apr '12

I think you made a very good decision for you & your two children. I'm sorry it happened because you were pressured though :( how sad... You shoukd talk to someone about it. Do you have any health insurance

Yurvette [♥] 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Hyrule Castle, LZ, San Marino 36693 posts
29th Apr '12
Quoting IMHO:" *hugs* You are not horrible. Don't be so hard on yourself. I wish I could pour you a cup of tea and ... [snip!] ... suggest seeing a doctor for something. Best of luck, doll. No one judges us so harshly as ourselves. Be kind to yourself."

this.



When I went back with my ex he told me it was him or the baby. I chose him... If you need to talk to someone about it. You can PM me anytime.

dnp87 Due October 6; 1 child; Maryland 188 posts
29th Apr '12

I'm sorry for your situation, you did what was best for you and your family. You should probably seek some help from a counselor to talk it out and help your self feel better. I wish you the best of luck and hang in there.

Brayden's Mama Due July 28 (boy); 16 kids; Connecticut 15 posts
29th Apr '12

Hey sweetie, I'm 19, this is my second pregnancy but first child I'm keeping. I went through the same exact thing you did, I hate to say the word but yes, I had an abortion. It was just last summer, August 12th, 2011. I'll never forget the date...My boyfriend and I were going through a rough time and I felt like it was the right thing to do. We broke up for four months, and just got back together four months ago. I'm pregnant, and it's not his. It's crazy hard and I know exactly how you feel. But look at it this way, abortion is not wrong! "No woman can call herself free who does not own and control her body. No woman can call herself free until she can choose consciously whether she will or will not be a mother." I know you regret your decision, (as do I) but things truly happen for a reason. Think about it, if your unborn baby wasn't meant to not have a chance at life, God could have protected him. Given you a sign and talked you out of it, or by some miracle wouldn't have allowed the procedure to work. Sitting here eight and a half months after my traumatic expierence, I got through it by love and support from my boyfriend of three years who is still by my side though I'm pregnant by another man, and got rid of his baby. All you need is love, and to tell yourself it's okay. Talk to God about it too, he helped me. It's devestating, I know; but you won't get anywhere in life from a heart ache. Keep your head up and learn from it. You're not a bad person, you're a beautiful mother of two and WILL get through this. God bless you <3

NicoleKMK 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Killeen, TX, United States 769 posts
29th Apr '12

Thank you all so much for all your kind words. It means a lot and since I feel so alone lately, I am glad I can come on here and here you all say these sweet things. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. and I do still have health insurance and I will seek counseling when I am healed and I will talk to you ladies that have offered it. But for now I am exhausted I just flew back home today to be with family for a while and I am in horrible pain still with a headache. But again thank every single one of you. I will just see it as my child being with my mother and god. They will take good care of my baby. <3

IMHO 2 kids; Ontario 7746 posts
29th Apr '12
Quoting NicoleKMK:" Thank you all so much for all your kind words. It means a lot and since I feel so alone lately, I am ... [snip!] ... single one of you. I will just see it as my child being with my mother and god. They will take good care of my baby. <3 "


<3<3



Get some rest, Honey. Everything looks a little better with a good night's sleep.

user banned Due March 21; 1 child; Colorado 67779 posts
29th Apr '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting NicoleKMK:</b>" Thank you all so much for all your kind words. It means a lot and since I feel so alone lately, I am ... [snip!] ... single one of you. I will just see it as my child being with my mother and god. They will take good care of my baby. <3 "</blockquote>




It is better to talk to someone soon as opposed to waiting until you're healed. I'm glad you feel a little better now :)