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jdbjskbfkefbs Illinois 289 posts
4th May '12

He fucked up a bunch of times to keep going back & leaves you pregnant with kids and everything on you. You would be better off without him or at least write to him telling him how u feel because he is soo WRONG.

StephNDelFerguson Due August 25; 2 kids; Huntington, West Virginia 19 posts
4th May '12

Thanks Everyone for your comments I really value them!!!I agreee with all of you!!! I love him to death butI have been more alone then together with him...I've had to settle...I've had every child by myself bc he is in prison and he doesnt seem to even take any of that into consideration...I'm really lonely ya know?...I'm so faithful and commited that I won't leave but I think maybe I should bc this probably won't be the last and it's def not the first...Just last week he asked me to send him $250 dollars so he could smoke cigs (which he'snot allowed to do), play cards, and buy some comminssary...What husband asks their struggling wife for $250 dollars period?!!! But in the end I'm always the bad person and left crying myself to sleep..

Rumple Foreskin 3 kids; Kentucky 47763 posts
4th May '12
Quoting StephNDelFerguson:" Thanks Everyone for your comments I really value them!!!I agreee with all of you!!! I love him to death ... [snip!] ... their struggling wife for $250 dollars period?!!! But in the end I'm always the bad person and left crying myself to sleep.."


Id tell him to go suck some c**k for the money....just me though. Lmao.

OH Brother! 17 kids; Pennsylvania 2257 posts
4th May '12
Quoting StephNDelFerguson:" Thanks Everyone for your comments I really value them!!!I agreee with all of you!!! I love him to death ... [snip!] ... their struggling wife for $250 dollars period?!!! But in the end I'm always the bad person and left crying myself to sleep.."


I'm really sorry youre going through this. But he did this to himself and his family. If he wants to change then he will, but it just seems like he isn't going to. I know someone like this, it sucks to see them hauled off to jail for stupid things that they should have done. But its all on him. if he continues to act like that, I would just stop answering the phone and not write for a while to be honest. Until he stops being so selfish and gets his priorities straight you're going to be alone.

jdbjskbfkefbs Illinois 289 posts
4th May '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting StephNDelFerguson:</b>" Thanks Everyone for your comments I really value them!!!I agreee with all of you!!! I love him to death ... [snip!] ... their struggling wife for $250 dollars period?!!! But in the end I'm always the bad person and left crying myself to sleep.."</blockquote>




A VERY SELFISH PERSON.

Rhia Leigh 33 kids; Massachusetts 1312 posts
4th May '12

He sounds very selfish and unappreciative. He should understand that his actions have put you in this situation (even if ti is over something stupid) and from the sounds of it you're handling everything on your own and doing the best you can. He's lucky to have a woman like you who sticks around for him and does all that because many wouldn't bother. If he's being a dick like that now, how is he going to treat you when he gets out? He doesn't seem to care very much about taking care of you or his family. I'd explain to him how you're struggling and why you don't have the time/energy to write him every day and don't let him make you feel bad for getting yourself the things you need. If he really doesn't want to understand then he doesn't sound worth having around.

Amanda Richey Verdier Due June 26; 3 kids; Fort Smith, Arkansas 5 posts
4th May '12

Oh honey..... I know the whole situation sucks!! You're not being selfish at all!! Really?? He's an ass! Stop thinking about him and what he wants. His mistakes put him there and he needs to man up. You need to focus on yourself and your children. No man should ever come before either one! Not even their daddy. I'm not being mean just being real... My boys father went to prison and left me alone to take care of them by myself. I did the best I could for 2yrs but, he just expected so much.... Letters, commissary, phone calls.... You can't do it!!! I was struggling to make it out here but, made sure he was taken care of!! Don't do that to yourself or your children you both deserve so much more! Do yourself a favor and let him go...

adrians_momma Due August 21; 1 child; Monett, Missouri 3 posts
4th May '12

everyone has there own thoughts an opinions about this situation but noone can tell u anything u have to do what ur heart tells u to do if u feel like u can do better on ur own raising ur kids then do it! youve done it 60% of it on ur own anyway but if u love him and u wanna stick by his side! then put ur foot down and tell him look im only one person who can only to so much u left me out here on my own AGAIN! TO STRUGGLE! ON THE OTHER HAND I DO KNOW WHAT UR GOING THRU my man was recently arersest and placed in ice immigration he lied to the prosecuter and said he was born here so now there wantingto prosecute him and they say the least he will do is 18 months and im now 6 months pregnant with no job! this is his first time geting arrested while weve been together it hurts me so bad that he wont be here for the birth of our son.. and i know it hit him hard cus he crys everytime we speak on the phone.. =(

bratty275 Due October 30; 3 kids; Lansing Charter Township, Michigan 6 posts
4th May '12

I was dating a guy who was in and out of jail for two years, thankfully we didn't have children together. But I understand that it is extremely hard sometimes to write them and constantly add money to their account. And they forget sometimes that even though in their mind it may seem like a smaall request, when you mix it into everyday life and add it to a million other things you have to do that day, that little request is actually a huge request. You may feel like you are being selfish, but you need to be. You need to think about that beautiful baby inside you. Mommy comes first. If you're stressed, babys stressed. And thats no good. Sometimes when we really love somebody its easy for us to accept a way of life we normally would've never settled for, we almost become "use" to it. I don't want to tell you what you should do but from somebody who has gone through it, you deserve better. :)

Lorraine Anderson Due June 12; 18 kids; United Kingdom 257 posts
4th May '12

I think you need to toughen up and have things your way, he has no right to give demands when you are doing everything alone for most of your relationship. It is time for you to put your foot down and tell him how it is and have things on your terms, he can accept it or not, and youl soon see if he has the same respect and loyalty for you as you do for him x

Roneshia Gibson Due July 23; 1 child; Las Vegas, Nevada 3 posts
4th May '12

in response to that your are not being selfish for wanting to get your rest. He should understand that demands of being pregnant because he was there with the first two. I honestly think he's just being selfish and hate the fact that you don't have much time to even think about writing him. if he calls that many times a day there is no reason for you even have to write him. but if he limits the calls a day and give you time relax then maybe he will get a letter. Imonly responding because my fiancee has been locked up also since i was 2 months pregnant and im almost due now and we also have 5 year old to take care of. so we are in sinilar situtations. Since yall been together that long he needs a reality check because thats gon be only way to get thru to him

Leland makes Three =] Due April 8; 1 child; 1 angel baby; Grand Rapids, MI, United States 2353 posts
4th May '12
Quoting StephNDelFerguson:" So this might not be perticularly related to being pregnant but idk...let me just give you sum background ... [snip!] ... he has a woman that takes care of everything out here and he has nothing to worry about!!! Help me...give me your opinion!!! "


I deal with the same sh** my so... we arn't married and we have a 7mo old. and thank god I am not pregnant right now... I would flip. I live with my parents. trying to get on my feet and he is constantly demanding me to do stuff for him. he has no job. has had one for a total of 6mos the entire relationship... I fully supported him and his cigarette habit. and put a roof over his head and food on his plate. wtf he is a grown man. he should be supporting us and we should support eachother. My so is in rehab for his drinking problem but he still wants me to spend all my time with him every day i have off and that consists of spending lots of money ( hes not welcome at my parents thats another story) Money I could use to get into my own place. he dosent pay cs to me or anything. I dont want it. but I feel like I am supporting a full grown man. If I were you I would say a phone call every other day. and you would write once a week. heck... I have a website if you want for cheap cards. I wrote them to my so when he was in jail for 2mos. ( last year this time and yeah I was 5 mos pregnant so I understand how you feel to a point)give him the tough love honey... =] it was his dumb decisions that got him in the mess.. my so and I got into it last night over him wanting me to pay off his probation... I told him I wasn't going to pay for his mistakes he has to take responsibility for his actions. its not mine.

Roneshia Gibson Due July 23; 1 child; Las Vegas, Nevada 3 posts
4th May '12
Quoting Leland makes Three =]:" I deal with the same sh** my so... we arn't married and we have a 7mo old. and thank god I am not pregnant ... [snip!] ... his probation... I told him I wasn't going to pay for his mistakes he has to take responsibility for his actions. its not mine."


WELL THIS DUDE YOU ARE WITH IS AN COMPLETE a*****e. YOU HAVE A BABY TO TAKE CARE OF HE NEEDS TO GROW THE HELL UP. IM PRETTY SURE HE WOULDNT MAKE A BABY WITH HIS MOTHER SO WHY SHOULD YOU HAVE TO BATHE HIM, NURTURE IS GROWN ASS MY SUGGESTION FOR YOU IS TO THE BEST YOU CAN DO FOR YOU AND YOUR LIL ONE. BECUZ HE'S GOING TO CONTINUE TO BE A JACK ASS UNTIL HE REALIZE WHAT HE HAD WAS GONE.

* Sara * 2 kids; Texas 18864 posts
4th May '12
Quoting Rumple Foreskin
* Sara * 2 kids; Texas 18864 posts
4th May '12
Quoting Roneshia Gibson:" WELL THIS DUDE YOU ARE WITH IS AN COMPLETE a*****e. YOU HAVE A BABY TO TAKE CARE OF HE NEEDS TO GROW ... [snip!] ... BEST YOU CAN DO FOR YOU AND YOUR LIL ONE. BECUZ HE'S GOING TO CONTINUE TO BE A JACK ASS UNTIL HE REALIZE WHAT HE HAD WAS GONE."


WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING AT HER? IT'S NOT THAT SERIOUS.