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How to get over a loss missalex123 TTC since Jun 2012; Fruita, Colorado 1 posts
5th Jun '12

Ok My name is Alex and about 6 months ago I conceived a baby, and I started dating someone when I was about 2 months along. I didn't tell him I was pregnant because I still wasn't sure on what I was going to do. I had an abortion, no one knew and when one day I was talking to my boyfriend at the time now my fiance it slipped out that I had a baby. I told him I had a miscarriage because he I knew he would have left me if I told him the truth. I am so upset and full of guilt and I just don't know what to do. He wants to try to have a baby but I just don't think I could handle it. And I really don't want to find out if the abortion ruined my chance to have kids in the future.

Blankita*Leeliuna's Mama* 1 child; Wisconsin 838 posts
5th Jun '12

I would have told the truth that way you wouldn't have felt as guilty as you do now and that way you would have someone to talk to about it. You will have to explain to him why you don't think you will be ready or even wanting a baby at the moment...

Julia Schwartz 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Shelton, WA, United States 751 posts
5th Jun '12

I would never be with someone who I had to lie to about things like that... it won't help your healing process at all. You need to be able to be honest with him (and yourself) about your experience and you need to face your past to be able to make anything out of your future together. If he isn't willing to accept that you made a choice with your own body then he's not worth your time, in my opinion.

FroggysMommy 1 child; Golden, Colorado 27902 posts
5th Jun '12

He is NOT the person for you if he would leave you over an abortion. Your body, your choice. If he can't handle that, he's just a little boy and doesn't deserve you.



That being said, I know of an abortion message board that has support groups to help you with structured support and counseling talks. PM me if you want the address as I won't publicly post it.