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is this fair? mommytobeornotbe111 Due January 28; San Diego, California 3 posts
15th Jun '12

Well I'm just wondering if a girl gets pregnnt behind her man's back and he already says he doesn't want ny at the moment... She does it so it can save their marriage instead oit seems that terminating would save it nd she doesn't want to but she kind of caused it on her does she deserve to deal with it this way? This is pretty much what's happening to me... Advice?

Hailee's Mama + 1 1 child; 1 angel baby; Georgia 13140 posts
15th Jun '12

I don't think it's fair at all for the guy, he clearly said he wasnt ready just because you push it doesnt make him anymore ready.

BαtMαɳ Gotham, __, United States 64858 posts
15th Jun '12

Ummmm :roll:

Gold 2 kids; Somewhere under Wonderland, VA, United States 38324 posts
15th Jun '12

I don't think that was fair to him at all.



But, you have to do what is best for you and your family and only you can make that decision. Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

LysW 2 kids; Turner, Me, United States 10846 posts
15th Jun '12
Quoting Hailee's Mama + 1:" I don't think it's fair at all for the guy, he clearly said he wasnt ready just because you push it doesnt make him anymore ready."

:!:



My husband would be furious with me if I got pregnant "behind his back" like saying i took BC but didn't. IT isn't fair to him at all. We have a great marriage and I bet we would STRUGGLE after that.. The trust being gone for one.

Tea Bag McGee Due November 21 (girl); 2 kids; tardis, OS, United States 6891 posts
15th Jun '12

if the person didnt want a baby how could someone think it would save something at all if its not wanted?

Allons-y Due January 29 (girl); 2 kids; Utah 2318 posts
15th Jun '12
Quoting pumpkin & monster fetus:" if the person didnt want a baby how could someone think it would save something at all if its not wanted?"


This!!

mommytobeornotbe111 Due January 28; San Diego, California 3 posts
15th Jun '12
Quoting Hailee's Mama + 1:" I don't think it's fair at all for the guy, he clearly said he wasnt ready just because you push it doesnt make him anymore ready."


yeah that's what I hear a lot...

Brock Obama 1 child; Spain 6372 posts
15th Jun '12

It's not like she "deserves it" but she put herself into that situation.
But for the guy... totally not fair.

mommytobeornotbe111 Due January 28; San Diego, California 3 posts
15th Jun '12
Quoting Kool-Aid Fraud [35w]:" I don't think that was fair to him at all. But, you have to do what is best for you and your family and only you can make that decision. Good luck with whatever you choose to do. "


well my priorities are my relationship. I always thought he wanted kids once I got pregnant I thought he'd accept it but hasn't so I guess that leaves me to do what's best for us really...

Brock Obama 1 child; Spain 6372 posts
15th Jun '12
Quoting mommytobeornotbe111:" well my priorities are my relationship. I always thought he wanted kids once I got pregnant I thought he'd accept it but hasn't so I guess that leaves me to do what's best for us really..."


Try to improve the communication in your relationship.
And if you want it that bad, you should talk to him and do what is best for the two of you.

* MRS KING * 2 kids; Whitesboro, Oklahoma 1550 posts
15th Jun '12

Imo, ya fucked up. But if you want this baby, even just a little, dont sacrifice the baby just because you screwed up, and he says he isnt ready. Tons of people arent ready, but they get ready when its time. They have to. Just be 100% positive that this relationship that you jeopardized for this baby in the first place, is good enough to make the decision to not keep it. You dont want him ready later, and then regret having an abortion.

Sherlock Holms 5 kids; 4 angel babies; United Kingdom 39654 posts
15th Jun '12

If he does not want a baby then he should be doing something as well to prevent it happening, I do believe that a baby can save a relationship it just prolongs the break up and makes you more unhappy and stressed for longer because you have a child to think about. If you feel that you can take care of the baby alone then good luck in your decision I am sure that you will make the right one for you.



Good luck.

Ellie Goulding 1 child; London, --, United Kingdom 4677 posts
17th Jun '12
Quoting Angel Lamb:" Imo, ya fucked up. But if you want this baby, even just a little, dont sacrifice the baby just because ... [snip!] ... place, is good enough to make the decision to not keep it. You dont want him ready later, and then regret having an abortion. "

This, completely. Good luck with your decision.

Erin-Emely Britt Due June 24 (girl); Ottawa, Ontario 211 posts
18th Jun '12
Quoting mommytobeornotbe111:" Well I'm just wondering if a girl gets pregnnt behind her man's back and he already says he doesn't want ... [snip!] ... she kind of caused it on her does she deserve to deal with it this way? This is pretty much what's happening to me... Advice?"

A baby NEVER saves a marrage. A baby puts strain on a marrage. It's not fair to the guy and horrible to do to both the baby and the man.