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I feel so guilty... Lynsey(: Due March 29; Holly Springs, Mississippi 118 posts
31st Jul '12

I had an abortion when I was 15.. for obvious reasons, I WAS 15. I feel like it was the right thing to do at the time..I was able to finish high school and achieve alot. Now I'm 18, still with the same boyfriend and i have just found out that I'm pregnant again. We are keeping this baby. My abortion was so traumatizing that I just couldn't ever do that again.. Now I'm just full of guilt.. Some how I feel like the other baby will be hurt by this, like he/she wasn't good enough.. idk.. I just want to forgive myself. I say I do but I don't think I believe that... It just feels like I'm betraying him/her by having another baby.. :(

Mrs. Conan O'Brien 2 kids; Colorado 20915 posts
31st Jul '12

if you felt it was a good choice at the time, then don't beat yourself up about it. I mean really, it isn't very likely that you'd have the same boyfriend @ 18 right? I don't know many people that are dating the same dude as when they were 15. It's only 3 yrs but I think it's a really big difference. Ignore any hurtful comments you may get on this & enjoy your current pregnancy :)

Sugar. 17 kids; New Zealand 779 posts
31st Jul '12

I felt the exact same way, having been in the same situation as you. Then someone told me that the spirit of your angel baby will live on in your first child. Sounds kind of ridiculous but it does help :)

jaydelouise1991 1 child; Newcastle, Australia 195 posts
31st Jul '12

I understand completely. I'm still with the same partner and have been for 3 years. We fell pregnant at 19 and knew we couldn't afford it at the time. When I fell pregnant this time I panicked we couldn't afford it but we were serious about trying. I went full time (up until 34w were I stopped) and my partner does over time. Now we know, yes it's tight, but we've done the right thing. If we had had a baby at 19 we would of had the worst experience, been unprepared and not given a child the life it needs. And now we can :). Everything happens for a reason and just remember you have this LO on the way :) they will make even the darkest moment bright again <3 good luck!

Kelly-Ann Louise 1 child; 1 angel baby; Australia 831 posts
31st Jul '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lynsey(::</b>" I had an abortion when I was 15.. for obvious reasons, I WAS 15. I feel like it was the right thing to ... [snip!] ... myself. I say I do but I don't think I believe that... It just feels like I'm betraying him/her by having another baby.. :("</blockquote>



I also had an abortion when I was 15, at 9 weeks and 3 days.
Now that I'm pregnant again, it was hard getting through that day where I reached 9 weeks 3 days.
I just think, how could I have done that to my own little baby.
I just hope I can give this baby the best life, to make up for the life the other one lost :(

Nigel Thornberry 1 child; New Hampshire 6415 posts
31st Jul '12

You're in a completely different place now than you were with that first baby. You got to finish school, achieve a lot of things you wanted to, and considering you're still with the same guy I would say establish a great relationship. There's no need for you to feel guilty, this just happened to fall at a better point in your life than your prior pregnancy did.

MiriRose923 Colorado 30 posts
31st Jul '12

Hi Lynsey ~ First I want to say congratulations on your pregnancy, it's great to hear that you your boyfriend are looking forward to the arrival of this precious little one!

I'm so sorry you're struggling with feelings of guilt and are having a tough time forgiving yourself for your past abortion. You're not alone in feeling this way! There is some information that Focus on the Family offers on their site for women in your shoes here: http://family.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/25543?p=1157699
I work with Focus, and they also have counselors available to speak with you over the phone. If you think this would help, I hope you'll consider giving them a call - the phone number is in the above link.

I will be praying for you. ((Hugs))

Lynsey(: Due March 29; Holly Springs, Mississippi 118 posts
31st Jul '12
Quoting Sugar.:" I felt the exact same way, having been in the same situation as you. Then someone told me that the spirit ... [snip!] ... told me that the spirit of your angel baby will live on in your first child. Sounds kind of ridiculous but it does help :)"


I've heard that.. I'm not sure if I believe it but it does sound good.

Lynsey(: Due March 29; Holly Springs, Mississippi 118 posts
31st Jul '12

thanks for the encouraging words ladies! helped alot(:

Elizabeth Prather Due October 17 (boy); Sacramento, California 19 posts
1st Aug '12

I can understand how you feel. I got pregnant at 18 and was with my boyfriend since I was 16. I didn't feel at all ready to have a child. Most people I know are on welfare and I could not live that way I would not put my child through that, so I made the decisions to end my pregnancy. I felt so bad like I had committed a crime didn't want to let anyone know what I had done... now my husband and I have been together 8 years married almost 1 and were in a place to have a child. we have been trying for almost a year and I felt like god was punishing me and would not allow me to have another child. It was heart breaking when I finally conceived I cried and I now feel like I did the right thing. In the back of my mind I will always feel sad that I ended my own child's life. To feel that child grow inside of you and to have wanted him so bad makes all the difference !!!!