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18 years old,expecting, scared, my two options- Nicole Loach Due April 28 (boy); Bonita Springs, Florida 28 posts
26th Aug '12

Hi. My name is Nicole and I turned 18 on August 5th. I just recently found out that I am pregnant after going to my yearly check up at the gyno this past Thursday. I do not know exactly how far along I am, but I do know that I am early and can be anywhere from 3-7 weeks. I have my first ultra sound on Tuesday. So far, I've been pressured by the people around me to get an abortion. This last week I've had horrible dreams, have been breaking down crying practically everyday going back and forth from these two options that lay in front of me. I just don't think that I could ever do such a thing. I am still with my boyfriend, we've been happily together for almost 3 years. He is scared, and also mentioned our other option but he also made it very clear that no matter what it is my decision and he will support me either way. That's all i've been hearing lately from everyone...Are they just wanting to me to give in to their expectations? Will they be disappointed when I decide to have my child? I know it's not going to be easy, but if everyone says they will support me no matter what, that makes me feel alot better. Although they know that I could make another choice. I am just afraid of disappointing them, but I have a feeling once everyone around me knows that I am pregnant and everyone accepts that, stress will be relieved. I know that my boyfriend will get much more excited as the time goes on, I just hope that after 3 years of eachother this will not come between us because as of right now if he could have gone back and been more careful, he probably would. We both have jobs that pay good money and we are both going to school, I just want to know I can give this child an amazing life. I just dont even know the first thing about being a parent and I am scared. I'm so happy I found this website so I can hopefully talk to others in the same situation. it's nice just nice to be able to type and type and type, reach out to others, and know I will not be judged. Any help, suggestions, or advice?

Faye's Mama 1 child; Springfield, MO, United States 4569 posts
26th Aug '12

Good luck.

May♥ 1 child; Texas 9183 posts
26th Aug '12

Good luck!!!



Dont let anyone pressure you into something you could regret forever. Your 18, did you graduate High School yet?



Conrgatulations on your pregnacy.

Mann Makin' Mama[BBM] 18 kids; Dalton, Georgia 11563 posts
26th Aug '12

Don't let ANYONE make the decision about what you do with your child.



Good luck, do what you feel is right.

♥MomToSilas+1♥ Due December 9; 1 child; ., IL, United States 11490 posts
26th Aug '12

First off, don't let anyone determine what you should do or pressure you at all. The choice is yours. If you choose to parent then good for you. Everyone will relax after a while and become a lot more supportive and open to the idea. I was in a similar situation with my BD when I found out I was pregnant. He wanted me to get an abortion and yelled and yelled while I broke down in tears. But it didn't take long for him to apologize and accept it. We did end up breaking up because we are just not good for eachother..



Being scared of becoming a mother is totally normal aswell. I was terrified to have my son but it comes very easily and naturally! As long as you are determined to give your child a good life.



In the end it is your decision on what you want to do. But don't let them put a bug in your ear and tell you what to do. Its your child and your life :) if you "disappoint" them then they are the ones missing out not you.

I'm His Amy He's My Rory 2 kids; Caldwell, Idaho 49343 posts
26th Aug '12

Sweetheart, NONE of us know anything about being a parent until we've been there. We all learn as we go, so don't let that deter you. You sound like a bright girl and a person that has decent sense so do what you feel is best for you. If you want to keep your baby do it. You'll be almost finished with school by the time baby is here so hopefully you can graduate right on time :) Even if you want to continue and go to college you'll have the summer off, baby will be a few months old and you could even take online classes for your first year. You can get financial aid to help with college and child care even. You CAN do it if you want to! :)

Nicole Loach Due April 28 (boy); Bonita Springs, Florida 28 posts
26th Aug '12

Thank you so much, I've been reading online about abortions these last few days and it seems as if many people regret their decision. I feel as if I could be a great mom and I know that I would be giving up alot of the things girls my age do (partying and what not), for some reason I feel completely okay with that. Having a boyfriend for so long at such a young age you don't really go out much anyways!



Yes, I graduated Highschool in June and my boyfriend and I are both attending the same college. It is his sophomore year and my freshman year.

Baby B<3 1 angel baby; 16167 posts
26th Aug '12

If you think you can take care of a child then keep it don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you may or may not want to do. A good idea would be a pro and con listen of each option and deal with it that way or just think about what you would like to do because everyone is scared when they find out their pregnant especially for the first time so your nerves may be what is making you so ify on everything. Just think really hard before making a decision and don't stress too much its bad on you and the baby. Congrats on the pregnancy! Hope you make the right decision for you and your baby I know its going to be a hard decision to make!

Mrs. Conan O'Brien 2 kids; Colorado 20924 posts
26th Aug '12

I think there is a lot of propaganda online about abortions though, TBH. Most people I know that had abortions do not regret it at all.



Don't do it though, unless you're 100% sure it's what you want to do. I got pregnant at 18 & had my son @ 19. I wish I could have waited at least another few yrs, so there is that... but it all worked out for me in the end. Nobody pressured me to get an abortion though :? That's messed up

Nicole Loach Due April 28 (boy); Bonita Springs, Florida 28 posts
26th Aug '12

Wow I can honestly say that I am so happy I found out about this website, because you all are already making me feel so much better. Of course it is a hard decision, but I feel as if I know what the right one is. I shouldn't let people try to talk me out of this any longer, and you are right...it is messed up. I'm just excited for others to adjust and be excited with me.

Baby B<3 1 angel baby; 16167 posts
26th Aug '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Nicole Loach:</b>" Wow I can honestly say that I am so happy I found out about this website, because you all are already ... [snip!] ... me out of this any longer, and you are right...it is messed up. I'm just excited for others to adjust and be excited with me. "</blockquote>




It will be hard for the people to get use to, but they will come around, if you ever need anyone to talk to you can PM me.

1 child; United Kingdom 1719 posts
26th Aug '12

Good luck :)
Just know that you're making the right decision as long as its a decision that you made and are sure about!
My son wasn't planned and he is the best thing that ever happened to me, you don't know what love is until you look into your child's eyes.
No mum will yell you they knew everything when they had their child, its a steep learning curve and you learn new thongs everyday.
Please make sure you don't let anyone pressure you!

Nicole Loach Due April 28 (boy); Bonita Springs, Florida 28 posts
26th Aug '12

Thank you, I will :) and thanks for the advice Becky!

October2011 2 kids; Pennsylvania 6926 posts
26th Aug '12

Good luck and congrats!
dont worry about dissapointing anyone but yourself.

♥MomToSilas+1♥ Due December 9; 1 child; ., IL, United States 11490 posts
26th Aug '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Nicole Loach:</b>" Wow I can honestly say that I am so happy I found out about this website, because you all are already ... [snip!] ... me out of this any longer, and you are right...it is messed up. I'm just excited for others to adjust and be excited with me. "</blockquote>



Glad we could help you. I came to BG for similar reason. I wanted to communicate with other mamas that may know what I was going through. If you ever need someone to talk to I'm always available to talk :) don't hesitate to PM me.



I wish you the best and hope others come around to support your decision. No matter what it is :)