Reply
THE Draco Malfoy 2 kids; Tennessee 20889 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Milk Monster:" Not at all.... DUH. I'm sorry, but a 3 year old CANNOT in any aspect raise another child. :roll:"

regardless of age. when i got pregnant, i thought, "well, i practically helped raise DH's cousin's kids. minus the financial part." but you aren't ever prepared for what your body goes through with labor and recovery. on top of being EXHAUSTED 24/7. the youngest was like 6-9 months when i started watching her. i didn't realize that younger is MUCH more difficult. newborns are harder.

mommytomel(: 1 child; California 1274 posts
16th Sep '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting BoogerBear's Momma:</b>" For one, your child isnt here yet....and two, babies are cheap compared to a child or even teenager. Not trying to shoot ya down, but it is true..."</blockquote>




We are at a good place right now and I know when my child is older we will be at an even better place .....

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting PooterButt'sMommy:" regardless of age. when i got pregnant, i thought, "well, i practically helped raise DH's cousin's kids. ... [snip!] ... was like 6-9 months when i started watching her. i didn't realize that younger is MUCH more difficult. newborns are harder."



Shit, my son had me fooled, he was the perfect newb. Thought my daughter would be the same... nope! Pretty sure she has colic and she is just.... a real baby. A slap in the face to the little fantasy I was living in when I had my son!



OP being a mother at any age is hard, but it is completely different than being around kids or baby sitting or whatever you are considering "raising" your siblings. I used to think oh, I've been arounds kids of all ages my entire life, I got this. Then reality hit me and it hit me hard. It is so hard being a mom in every aspect. Some people might say it's easy, hell I know I have, but it's hard for everyone. There is so much that comes a long with being a parent that I'm sure you don't want to give up just yet.



Small things like showering alone, peeing alone, eating a hot meal, not smelling like spit up, showering every day, going out with friends whenever you feel like it, etc. You wont be able to do that with a baby... Hell it's been two years and I still can't pee alone. :roll:

Regina Stevenson Due November 29 (twins); 1 child; Michigan 388 posts
16th Sep '12

Having a baby at any age is not easy. I got pregnant when I was 15 baby was due when I was 16 and unfortunatly I miscarried. But I look at it as a blessing because I know now what I didnt know then. Dad was and still is to this day an asshole!! I would have hated having to have him around to "help" with that child when he still hasnt grown up and he is now 27.
My first actual baby was at 21 and dad is alot older than me but we though who cares age is just a number you cant help who you love. Sure he was there we both worked in the same factory things were going well. Then one day 18 months after our son was here he accused me of cheating on with him with an exboyfriend (actually the same one as mentioned above) and seeing as the trailor and utilities are all in my name I told hihm to pack his shit and leave, because if he didnt beleive me when I swore on our sons head that I never cheated on him how could he ever trust me in the long haul??
And now I am pregnant with twins with a man I have known since first day of Highschool Freshman year and have had a crush on him ever since. We decided to finally try a relationship back in Jan and things were wonderful we did all the gooshy talk about one day getting married and having a baby and getting a house so that all of our children could have a bedroom to themselves. He has a dughter from a previous marriage and I have my son from the before relationship. We knew each other came as a package deal but in the end we got pregnant right away and I o mean right away. We started dating in Jan and were pregnant in Feb the twins are Due Nov 30th. So he got scared said I turned into a bitch and couldnt take it anymore and left me at 10 weeks pregnant. Hasnt done anything to help me provide for these twins and prepare for them. has only attened one appointment and that was the gender reveal and since has come by to visit but always ends up wanting sex and saying he loves me and everything. And come to find out he has started dating another woman and who knows if he has told her he is expecting ID Twin Boys in Nov and about his daughter from his first marriage.
So once Nov hits I will have 3 little boys who depend on me. A 4yr old and 2 newborn babes. And its gonna be harder then hell because their dads have both turned out to be complete assholes about everything. Thankfully I have my mom and step dad and the emotional support of some really good friends but what Iwouldnt give to have the father of the twins around and not be such an ass about things. But I know it is never going to happen and I have to find work and continue to provide for my family without their help. Because even though they will end up paying child support in the end it still will not be enough to make ends meet.
So my long winded story is just saying I hope you get the results you want because I thought I was ready at 16 but I wasnt. Because when my son was only a week old I looked at him at his 3am feeding and was in tears and jsut asked him "when is your mommy coming home? I want to go to bed and get some sleep." And as soon as those words came out of my mouth I remembered I am his mommy and he is dpeendant on me. Even though I was 21 it was still hard to wrap my brain around the fact that this new little life needed me for everything and he still does. I would never trade my kids for anything they are all precious in their own way but having a BD there full time is by far the best you are gonna get and to be able to afford that baby. So if you arent pregnant I so hope you wait awhile because it is hard. My bffl had her little girl when she wa 19 and said she wishes every day she would have waited longer so she could have experienced more of life and knew more about what to expect from being a mom, but that she would never trade her daughter for anything. She just wishes she would have given herself the time to do a bit more growing up and having her party days before she had a baby.
I wish you the best of luck no matter what the results turn out to be and I hope it is what you are looking for if it is truly what you want, Just know its alot harder than it seems.

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Isabel Avilez:" <blockquote><b>Quoting BoogerBear's Momma:</b>" For one, your child isnt here yet....and ... [snip!] ... We are at a good place right now and I know when my child is older we will be at an even better place ....."


I wish the two of you the best of luck with your little bundle! :)



Do you have a savings? (sorry if that's too personal)

mommytomel(: 1 child; California 1274 posts
16th Sep '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" I wish the two of you the best of luck with your little bundle! :) Do you have a savings? (sorry if that's too personal)"</blockquote>




Thanks and yup we have been saving since the day we found out we were expecting(:

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Isabel Avilez:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" I wish the two of you the best of luck ... [snip!] ... that's too personal)"</blockquote> Thanks and yup we have been saving since the day we found out we were expecting(:"


I so wish I would have done that with my first son! We didn't have a savings and when we brought him home we didn't have anywhere for him to sleep so we had to use his baby shower money to get him a bassinet. We were going to put the money in a savings account for him for when he turns 18 but nope, had to get him a bassinet.

mommytomel(: 1 child; California 1274 posts
16th Sep '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" I so wish I would have done that with my first son! We didn't have a savings and when we brought him ... [snip!] ... bassinet. We were going to put the money in a savings account for him for when he turns 18 but nope, had to get him a bassinet."</blockquote>



We plan to have everything by thanks giving just to be prepared if she decides she wants to be here early , I think we will be able to do it we already have everything picked out we might get the crib and bed set from babies r us next week .. We might not have a lot of extra money to go out to dinners or anything like that but having all these nice things for our little girl will be worth it... And did u guys have a job ? Sorry if too personal

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Isabel Avilez:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" I so wish I would have done that with my ... [snip!] ... that but having all these nice things for our little girl will be worth it... And did u guys have a job ? Sorry if too personal"

My husband did, I was going to school.

mommytomel(: 1 child; California 1274 posts
16th Sep '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" My husband did, I was going to school."</blockquote>




Same here! I want to keep going to school , I would sign her up for daycare while I'm at school but I think imma just have my mom watch her and pay her because she's going to be with someone I fully trust and my money is going to my mom...

ღ Ella&Noah ღ 2 kids; Aviemore, United Kingdom 249 posts
16th Sep '12

I had my Daughter at 20 and i was no where nea ready, and now im 28 and expecting again and im far from ready!!! Infact im worse this time then i was the first :( x

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Isabel Avilez:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" My husband did, I was going to school."</blockquote> ... [snip!] ... just have my mom watch her and pay her because she's going to be with someone I fully trust and my money is going to my mom..."



Ya, my husband wants me to keep going to school. For now I'm doing schooling online so I can be home with the kids since we don't want to pay for child care, but we're thinking of putting our 2 yr old in just 2 days a week for 3-6 hours a day just so he can interact with other kids his age and so I can focus a bit better on school. GL!



ETA: I PT'd you :)

mommytomel(: 1 child; California 1274 posts
16th Sep '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" Ya, my husband wants me to keep going to school. For now I'm doing schooling online so I can be home ... [snip!] ... hours a day just so he can interact with other kids his age and so I can focus a bit better on school. GL! ETA: I PT'd you :)"</blockquote>




I don't want to put her in a day care until she can talk and tell me if anyone is mistreating her , but I do want to put her in one at some point for your same reason! And thanks(:

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Isabel Avilez:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Milk Monster:</b>" Ya, my husband wants me to keep going ... [snip!] ... and tell me if anyone is mistreating her , but I do want to put her in one at some point for your same reason! And thanks(:"


I'm a little nervous, I'll probably cry like a baby! We go tomorrow to meet the lady and see how she is. She runs an out of home day care, she's licenced, DES certified, CPR and first aid certified as well so we think it might work for us. Just depends on how tomorrow goes! I'm not ready to let my baby go, but he needs to be around other kids so it'll be hard on both of us at first!

October2011 2 kids; Pennsylvania 6998 posts
16th Sep '12
Quoting Conway Kiddy