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Non-custodial parent refusing visitation? Thirteen and Boo 1 child; California 6087 posts
18th Oct '12

The court order we have in place has my daughter spending two days, one night a week with her dad. For the past two weeks now, he has called me an hour AFTER he was supposed to pick her up to say that he is very busy and can I please keep her?



He says he's busy with school, but he's taking one class at the local community college. I'm in school full-time, AND I work over 40 hours a week. Not claiming to be a better parent, just saying that if I still have time to spend with her, he definitely does.



She's been crying and begging to spend time with him.... if we have a court order in place, can I force him to spend time with her?



I know that sounds stupid, but I'm pretty sure he's only doing it because he stopped taking his medication and he thinks 'she's better off.' She's not. She wants her daddy.

breathingchaos 1 child; Tennessee 882 posts
18th Oct '12

Unfortunately, you can't force him. :/ But after a certain time they can say it's child abandonment...

O ♥ G 2 kids; Pride, Louisiana 10723 posts
18th Oct '12

You can't force him to take her but you can record how many visits he misses and they will probably just want you guys to go back to court and they will either cut down or revoke his visitation.

Thirteen and Boo 1 child; California 6087 posts
18th Oct '12
Quoting breathingchaos:" Unfortunately, you can't force him. :/ But after a certain time they can say it's child abandonment..."


I don't want to take her from him, though. Whatever problems he and I had, he's her dad, and a good one at that.



He's just a fucking idiot sometimes, and when he stops his anti-depressants he gets all self-sacrificing and shit. Ugh.



Uuuuuugh.



He gives me a headache.

That girl Amber +2 2 kids; California 6981 posts
18th Oct '12

Why would you want to force visitation if you think hes off his meds? That doesnt sound like a stable environment for a child. How old is your daughter?

O ♥ G 2 kids; Pride, Louisiana 10723 posts
18th Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Amberchik78:</b>" Why would you want to force visitation if you think hes off his meds? That doesnt sound like a stable environment for a child. How old is your daughter?"</blockquote>




I agree with this. I wouldn't hand over my child to someone who is unstable at the moment....no matter how good of a dad he CAN be.

Thirteen and Boo 1 child; California 6087 posts
18th Oct '12
Quoting Amberchik78:" Why would you want to force visitation if you think hes off his meds? That doesnt sound like a stable environment for a child. How old is your daughter?"


He's not unstable, he's just an idiot.



I wouldn't send my child anywhere I didn't believe she was entirely safe and happy.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
18th Oct '12

My ex hasn't exercised his court ordered access in 3 years.



You can't make someone be a parent.

Thirteen and Boo 1 child; California 6087 posts
18th Oct '12

But if he continues to not see her, would the court take away what visitation he has?



I mean, I don't want to ruin it for him if he's just going through a down period and gets his shit together in a month or two.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
18th Oct '12
Quoting The Goddamn Batman:" But if he continues to not see her, would the court take away what visitation he has? I mean, I don't ... [snip!] ... I mean, I don't want to ruin it for him if he's just going through a down period and gets his shit together in a month or two."


You'd have to take it to court to try and have them taken away.

JessicaMatlock:) Due May 7 (boy); 1 child; Modesto, California 1337 posts
19th Oct '12

as long as he contacts her atleast once ina 12 month period at least here in ca its not child abandonment.. and with it only being 2 weeks.,.. judges will tell you to give it time.. 6 months to a year from now if its still happening take it to court..

mamaluvsher4babies 36 kids; California 4230 posts
19th Oct '12

I wouldnt force him Maybe they can talk on the phone? I think its awesome your being so nice about it, most would be jerks. If he is having a hard time maybe talk to him about it?

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
19th Oct '12
Quoting mamaluvsher4babies:" I wouldnt force him Maybe they can talk on the phone? I think its awesome your being so nice about it, most would be jerks. If he is having a hard time maybe talk to him about it?"


I agree.



What about trying Skype?