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Is this considered cool in a "relationship"? Thalamus Nut Sack Japan 22 posts
20th Oct '12

This question is to the mamas who have/are dating or have had a friends with benefits in the past... (or please try to be understanding as different people have different preferences for the "rules" of their relationship)



Is it RUDE if the person you've been seeing since beginning of June, on and off, but still pretty much regular -- though not official, goes camping without telling you, doesn't respond back for 3 days? Shouldn't he have told me first he was going to be camping and out of reception? He was just sleeping in my bed the day or two before that. He's always telling me he loves me, even though I never said it back (lol) We're also on an exclusive kind of terms in that if we start seeing someone else, we both do not want to continue seeing each other. I mean, don't I have the right to text him that I'm dumping him because it looked like he was dumping me but being too p***y to say so? Considering he got back with his ex for a month, without telling me, a couple months ago.....even THOUGH he left her and got back with me after, the way he dumped me was uncool. It was just one of those ignore each other kind of ways to dump somebody. He said he wouldn't do something like that again.



I'm not psycho for thinking after not hearing from him for three days that the same thing was happening over again..... am I?



We're not official. We both have kids, and don't want it to get too complicated. Even considering that fact, he should have still told me that he was going to be out for a few days knowing we normally talk almost everyday.




Would you all consider that rude of him or psycho of me? Somewhere in between, like we're both wrong?

user banned 2 kids; Georgia 24891 posts
20th Oct '12

Psycho.

~~My Pet Wussy~~ 3 kids; USA 23722 posts
20th Oct '12

Meh, you aren't together. You are just some p***y to him.

Frankie-marie 18 kids; Texas 887 posts
20th Oct '12

Not rude of him. With my friends with benefits we didn't keep emotions just sex. I didn't care what he did with his life.

♥Mama Constantine 2 kids; 3 angel babies; Texas 5806 posts
20th Oct '12

He has to obligation to you.
So, not rude.

Aribean 1 child; California 11400 posts
20th Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Thalamus Nut Sack:</b>" This question is to the mamas who have/are dating or have had a friends with benefits in the past... ... [snip!] ... talk almost everyday. Would you all consider that rude of him or psycho of me? Somewhere in between, like we're both wrong?"</blockquote>




Psycho lol

Ravey Candyass 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Boston, Massachusetts 103960 posts
status 20th Oct '12

you just said at the beginning. not official. If you're not official he doesn't need to update you on his life.



and I think you already know the answer. why would you stay with someone like that

Thalamus Nut Sack Japan 22 posts
20th Oct '12
Quoting ~~My Pet Wussy~~:" Meh, you aren't together. You are just some p***y to him."


So is that how it works then... you're either with someone completely or you're just some p***y? Legit question, I am curious what the general consensus is on that. Especially when he goes out of his way to try and make me feel like I'm more than that.... although, I tend to actually agree with you where I feel like he is just using me, and trying to do all of that to make me keep hooking up with him.

Thalamus Nut Sack Japan 22 posts
20th Oct '12

I kind of feel like he can just go f**k himself then. Good luck finding someone else like me!

~Ba.zin.ga~ Due December 4 (girl); 1 child; Under your bed, OO, United States 3969 posts
20th Oct '12

Hm...I was kinda sorta in a situation like that a long time ago. I got angry when I saw him and he had hickies all over his neck and I knew they were not from me. But then I realized that we weren't even in a relationship so I had no reason to be mad at him. We were just friends with benefits and that's all it was. It ended and now we are just friends. Because it wasn't meant to be :)



So I don't think you should be angry at all. If you were never boyfriend/girlfriend then it shouldn't matter.

♥Mama Constantine 2 kids; 3 angel babies; Texas 5806 posts
20th Oct '12
Quoting Thalamus Nut Sack:" So is that how it works then... you're either with someone completely or you're just some p***y? Legit ... [snip!] ... agree with you where I feel like he is just using me, and trying to do all of that to make me keep hooking up with him."

To me, yes.

Tash+1 1 child; Canton, Ohio 7839 posts
20th Oct '12

You don't want it to be complicated but you're freaking out cuz he went camping and didn't tell you? Are you his mother? If not then just chill out. You aren't official, he coulda been banging some other b***h the entire time, and it isn't any of your business. FWB typically don't let emotions in, its just sex. If you're that freaked, make it official, if not, AGAIN, chill out.

~~My Pet Wussy~~ 3 kids; USA 23722 posts
20th Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Thalamus Nut Sack:</b>" So is that how it works then... you're either with someone completely or you're just some p***y? Legit ... [snip!] ... agree with you where I feel like he is just using me, and trying to do all of that to make me keep hooking up with him."</blockquote>




You aren't in a relationship, he has made it clear that he doesn't want one. He lays in your bed and says that he loves you but what he really means is that he loves laying in your bed and sleeping with you.

Katie ♥ Eli 1 child; California 2259 posts
20th Oct '12

If you're not in a relationship, I don't really feel either of you owe each other any explanations for what you do.



With that being said, I would be a little upset too... Which is why I never do friends with benefits relationships.

Ecstasy 18 kids; Cuba 7748 posts
20th Oct '12
Quoting Frankie-marie:" Not rude of him. With my friends with benefits we didn't keep emotions just sex. I didn't care what he did with his life."


This!



It was exactly the same for me when i was single.