Reply
Children who have FAS ......................... Oregon 14226 posts
22nd Oct '12

Fetal Alcohol Syndrome that is.



Does anyone know a child who has it?



I've been worried that my niece has it. Last time I saw her was at a year and I was hoping it was just me and that she would out grow it. However, now, 2 years later, she's back in our lives, and it hasn't change. Upon first glance she looks like a child with FAS, she's very withdrawn, you can tell she doesn't understand half of the words that you say to her. She has her own agenda, and runs away often. When she does speak, it's frustrating to her and she often shouts things out or else whispers incoherent things. When my brother and I try to reprimand her, she doesn't understand. I can see she doesn't understand, she reminds me so much of my son when he was that age(he's autistic).



However, on the flip side, she's very smart, very on top of things academically.



I brought it up to my brother's girlfriend yesterday without mentioning FAS, just asked if they thought she was "off" and my brother's girlfriend immediately said, "I think she has FAS" and I called to have my mother put my niece on her prayer list and I didn't even have time to suggest what I thought it was before she said, "I think she has FAS" and my mother has a degree that specializes in alcohol and substance abuse.



We don't know for sure if her mother drank during pregnancy. My brother has confirmed that he saw her drink 3 times during pregnancy. And we also found a study that babies that were exposed to marijuana smoke during pregnancy could have symptoms of FAS. Which we have no proof of but wonder if she smoked pot too during pregnancy. I do know that she gave up breastfeeding because she couldn't drink excessively while breastfeeding.



Anyways. For those that know babies who have had this? What are their signs and symptoms? My nieces face is what shows the first sign. Her eyes are unusually small, close together, and turn downward.



We're trying to get my brother on board to have her evaluated but we don't know how to break it to him. He loves his daughter so much and she means the world to him. He would be heartbroken if she was "special" in any way.



Any tips on this would be greatly appreciated.

Melissa + 2 :) 2 kids; Traverse City, Michigan 3069 posts
22nd Oct '12

We have two at the preschool I work at. Withdrawn, facial features including small upper lip and eyes, hearing problems, small head, poor coordination and delayed development

......................... Oregon 14226 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting Melissa :) 7 weeks!:" We have two at the preschool I work at. Withdrawn, facial features including small upper lip and eyes, hearing problems, small head, poor coordination and delayed development"


can i send you a picture of her? See what you think?

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
22nd Oct '12

Well, if everything you're saying is true (I'm not doubting you), then I'm sure he knows she's special.



I would probably bring it up in a somewhat unrelated conversation... Just be like, I have a friend that is pregnant and still drinking. Feel out his response and mention you never drank during it and ask if his wife did?



I'd do something like that, lol

Melissa + 2 :) 2 kids; Traverse City, Michigan 3069 posts
22nd Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting TheCoopersKnitWitch:</b>" can i send you a picture of her? See what you think?"</blockquote>



Of course :)

That girl Amber +2 2 kids; California 6981 posts
22nd Oct '12

My mom smoked weed when she was pregnant with me and both of my siblings and we have had zero negative affects from it.

......................... Oregon 14226 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting Rd.:" Well, if everything you're saying is true (I'm not doubting you), then I'm sure he knows she's special. ... [snip!] ... drinking. Feel out his response and mention you never drank during it and ask if his wife did? I'd do something like that, lol"


I think he knows, but I don't think he wants to admit it. I don't think he wants to admit that his ex would hurt their child. I think we're in the denial phase.

......................... Oregon 14226 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting Amberchik78:" My mom smoked weed when she was pregnant with me and both of my siblings and we have had zero negative affects from it."


I'm sure that's true too. I was just stating we found a study on it. And we're wondering if that combined with the drinking might of done something

Melissa + 2 :) 2 kids; Traverse City, Michigan 3069 posts
22nd Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting TheCoopersKnitWitch:</b>" I think he knows, but I don't think he wants to admit it. I don't think he wants to admit that his ex would hurt their child. I think we're in the denial phase. "</blockquote>



We had a single father at the preschool who we thought was ignoring it. Finally we got him to have a meeting to okay that a referral be made. Before walking out he said about his ex, "If she broke something I can't fix, so help her god." His ex ran away while pregnant and dropped the baby off few months after she was born.

Lupin 2 kids; Edmonton, Alberta 10451 posts
22nd Oct '12

Some FAS kids do Not have any of the Physical Markers, But all of the Mental/Cognitive ones, & Other's have All of the Physical yet None of the Mental/Cognitive ones, But Most Kids have a Mix of the 2, & in different severeties. The only way to know for sure (Since both Physical & Mental/Cognitive ones can also just be flukes) is to have her tested. There are Multiple Tests including a DNA Test(Pretty New), & even then it's not a guarantee one way or another, just means, if they DO accept/say she has FAS, she is more likely to get help.



I know a kid who I am Pretty damn sure is actually a Crack-Baby, but how to say it with out Offending My actual family, & Not just Him & His Mom.
I also suspect My Husband has FAS, & if you look at one of His Nephews I'll be Damned if he Doesn't have Many of the Obvious Facial Traits of FAS, & there are a Few Mental/Cognitive issues he has cropping up that makes me even More Certain that the Poor Boy has it, but his parent's(My BIL & SIL) are trying to deny He has ANY issue at all, far less ones that aren't going to "Just Clear up with Time".
To me if that many people around her have the Same Suspicion he probably is in Denial, &/or already knows it, may even had her tested with out telling anyone.

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting Amberchik78:" My mom smoked weed when she was pregnant with me and both of my siblings and we have had zero negative affects from it."

I hate when people say that. There's a statistic to everything... not everyone in head on collisions die, so should she smash her car into someone elses? Not everyone overdoses on meth so should she start smoking it? Etc. That is NEVER a valid reason to do anything.

That girl Amber +2 2 kids; California 6981 posts
22nd Oct '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Rd.:</b>" I hate when people say that. There's a statistic to everything... not everyone in head on collisions ... [snip!] ... someone elses? Not everyone overdoses on meth so should she start smoking it? Etc. That is NEVER a valid reason to do anything."</blockquote>




Of course there is a statistic for everything. If you dont like what i have to say feel free to hit ignore.

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting Amberchik78:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Rd.:</b>" I hate when people say that. There's a statistic to ... [snip!] ... Of course there is a statistic for everything. If you dont like what i have to say feel free to hit ignore."

Actually, I believe if you don't like what I'm saying you can hit ignore. You posted in a public forum and I have the right to respond.

wyatt.earp. 2 kids; Tacoma, Washington 2166 posts
status 22nd Oct '12

one of my second cousin's has FAS.

......................... Oregon 14226 posts
22nd Oct '12
Quoting buzz killington:" one of my second cousin's has FAS."



So when I post the pictures on FB let me know what you think ok?