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Is it inappropriate to write down wants/needs on birthday in Dude, you Fugly! 18 kids; Winston-Salem, North Carolina 19869 posts
1st Nov '12

Being a mommy to a school kid is pretty new to me. I'm use to knowing who my kids play with and being friends with their parents first.. with that being said, the child/parent knows my child's interest and I know their child's interest. With Krysten in school now, I don't know hardly any of the kids nor the parents and vise versa for us.



So, as the subject line says; would it be inappropriate to write down wants/needs on birthday invites? But clearly state a gift is NOT necessary?



I'm asking this because Krysten got her first birthday invite from one of her classmates last week. I know the child a little, but only because SO's sons' play football and Krysten's little friend, her sister is a cheerleader for one of the teams. So me and her mom have briefly talked this season. BUT, I still really don't know her daughters likes and dislikes lol. So I'm clueless on what to get her. And it's making me think how's it going to be when Krysten's party comes around? I know parents have other stresses and worries to think about, so I'm just trying to make the party easy for anyone. But I don't want to come off rude or inappropriate.

☮[The Mrs.] FJB Due December 4; 3 kids; North Carolina 14335 posts
1st Nov '12

I think it's inappropriate, mainly because I think it would be kind of like implying that the gift is required, maybe do a theme for something she is into on the invite and then they will catch on?

Autumnal 17 kids; Weeki Wachee, Florida 785 posts
1st Nov '12

In my past experience, I've always phoned and asked the parent what their child likes or their child's clothing sizes. I assume they will call you if they don't know what to get her :) Just be sure to include you phone number on the invites. Maybe add "If you have any questions, feel free to call."



Although, I do think it's more common nowadays to make a wishlist on a website as well, so maybe you could do that?

*mommy to 3* Due March 7 (girl); 2 kids; Virginia 1167 posts
1st Nov '12

I wouldn't put it on the invite. When parents don't know what to get other children they usually just give a little money or a gift card to a toy store (in my experience). If the parent wants to know what to buy your child they can ask when they call or email to RSVP.

Jae- DJ Jordyn & Cams Mom 3 kids; San Diego, California 5928 posts
1st Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Autumnal:</b>" In my past experience, I've always phoned and asked the parent what their child likes or their child's ... [snip!] ... to call." Although, I do think it's more common nowadays to make a wishlist on a website as well, so maybe you could do that?"</blockquote>




Yea! I was gonna say you can do a wish list at Toy R Us that's simple but gives an idea of what the kids into.

mamaluvsher4babies 36 kids; California 4230 posts
1st Nov '12

I am old..so I am old school lol...My daughter in law does this and it annoys the hell out of me. I am just one of those that appreciate any gift.

MommyingWithGrace Beverly Hills, California 2427 posts
1st Nov '12

I think it's inappropriate. Sorry.
If you choose a birthday invite with a certain theme...such as Barbie, Lalaloopsey, etc...that child then already knows "Hey, this kid actually like Barbie, so lets look in the Barbie section for a gift". That could help some.

Bon QuiQui 18 kids; Princeton, New Jersey 348 posts
1st Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting test.my.gangsta!:</b>" I think it's inappropriate, mainly because I think it would be kind of like implying that the gift is required, maybe do a theme for something she is into on the invite and then they will catch on?"</blockquote>




Usually if the invites have a theme, if parents don't know what the get, they usually stick to the theme.

~*~ Nichole ~*~ 4 kids; Vancouver, Washington 11261 posts
1st Nov '12

We just stick to asking what the child likes when we RSVP if we don't know them that well.

Mommy of a giggler! 2 kids; Edmonton, Alberta 9017 posts
1st Nov '12

If your child is being invited, I would think they might know what thier friend would like, so I would ask them.

I usually just do invites on FB, and I do include clothing sizes and likes on there. Our situation is a little different though, my son has autism and gets very overwhelmed with to many toys so I actually ask people NOT to bring a gift or only something very small (like this year, I said if they HAD to bring a gift, because some of them feel guilty if they dont, to just bring one or two lego men). My kids have enough toys and clothes, what they want is to spend time with everyone :)

3 little monsters 3 kids; Olathe, Colorado 50990 posts
1st Nov '12

I think it is. I think part of the fun is letting the kid pick out a gift for their friend. He can get specific things he wants from you and surprise gifts that his friends picked out especially for him.

Destinite 1 child; 2 angel babies; Paradise, FL, United States 31666 posts
1st Nov '12

I do find it inapporpriate/bad etiquette to put gift requests on any invitation. I know it is tempting, but most people who are stumped will most likely call you for suggestions.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
1st Nov '12

I always send the receipt with the gift so they can return it of they have it or don't like the gift.



I usually always write on the invitation that its a Justin bieber themed Barbie etc......



My dd's first bday is Minnie mouse themed and I told everyone to get Minnie mouse gifts for her. Lol but its all family coming. To strangers I wouldn't lol