Quoting JessieLeeAnne:" :/ Have you ever went through not having your child latch and wanting soo bad for them to be EBF? If not, no wonder you think this article is stupid. "
no I haven't...but I can imagine how much it would hurt. I know people try to shame other parents for giving their babies formula but it shouldn't be like that..as long as their baby is getting fed that is all that matters.
having a newborn baby in the first place is hard.
I think its odd that a Dad wrote it...but that's just me. Personally I feel that connection between Mom and baby during breastfeeding can be personal and intimate as well as important nutrition/ immunity wise.
I think like you said- its nice because the Dad did it to try and make his wife feel better...but what if she wanted to try with the next baby or something? Yeah its obvious it wasnt super important to him- what about her? Breastfeeding can also be important to the Mom....in my situation it was the main thing that bonded us...I had bad PPD and it helped me too.
I almost had to give up in the beginning...if my guy wrote something like that it would drag the issue to me
I think it's great. This woman is very lucky to have such a supportive man who looks out for her. Breastfeeding has to work for mom and the baby. If it's not working for one, the other WILL NOT benefit from it. They tried and it didn't work, so they took the alternative. My daughter was formula fed after I failed at breastfeeding. There is nothing wrong with her. I never was made to feel like a horrible person for quitting. I wish I had a supportive partner in those stages, though.
Quoting TantricLemons:" It sounds to me like this mama has a great partner. He is working hard to give her a positive feeling ... [snip!] ... is to provide better support. And make breastfeeding possible for everyone, instead of this whole breast vs formula distraction"
You hit the nail on the head.
Countless times, I have been made to feel guily because of my choice to ff. My son was bf for a week. PPD, pain, exhaustion, and lack of support caused me to mix up that first bottle. Who knows, maybe if I would have stuck it out for another week, I would have a happy, healthy bf son. But it doesn't really matter to me because right now I have a happy, healthy ff son.
I loved breastfeeding. I worked so hard to relactate, and I feel so passionate about it.
However, I think that it's all up to the individual family what really works best. I think it is so heartless & foolish to say that there is only one "right" way in terms of how to feed a child - same goes for cosleeping/etc.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again, "A mother's love runs much deeper than how she feeds her child."
When i exclusiley BF for a full year, I felt like a prisoner and so alone. It always seemed to be me alone in a separate room, Bfing every hr while everyone else ate/talked/ventured out into the world. I feared being out somewhere and having to sit in a bathroom to feed, or go home with an angry infant. I always envied FF moms who could go about life as normal. Plus every hr feedings at night were exhausting. I want to FF this baby, but I cant afford it :( BF is wonderful, but its not so easy for everyone. Although I produced and physically BF with no issue, I think it took an emotional toll on me.
Quoting BryarWoods:" When i exclusiley BF for a full year, I felt like a prisoner and so alone. It always seemed to be me ... [snip!] ... but its not so easy for everyone. Although I produced and physically BF with no issue, I think it took an emotional toll on me."
do you go in another room when you are just at home?? and you can feed in public...just wear a cover up or something (though i understand if you aren't comfortable with that....I'm not really...i've only done it a couple times)
what about pumping too....
Quoting Christina Getty:" do you go in another room when you are just at home?? and you can feed in public...just wear a cover ... [snip!] ... if you aren't comfortable with that....I'm not really...i've only done it a couple times) what about pumping too...."
Well I was a teenager living at home, I would go into my/baby room to feed. House was always busy with people. I've never felt comfortable BF in public, just personal reasons. I did pump, but baby REFUSED to take a bottle, every bottle I tried.
Now married and in my twenties, hopefully im a little wiser this time and can make it work.
<blockquote><b>Quoting BryarWoods:</b>" When i exclusiley BF for a full year, I felt like a prisoner and so alone. It always seemed to be me ... [snip!] ... but its not so easy for everyone. Although I produced and physically BF with no issue, I think it took an emotional toll on me."</blockquote>
I seriously hate how our society makes BF women feel uncomfortable doing it in public...I was very nervous and felt isolated at first too...after like 4-5 months I was like f**k it and started BFing everywhere....it was surprising how easy it became and I got so good at being discreet...I just wear a tank under a loose shirt...you can't see anything
My first son would not latch and I ended up exclusivly pumping, which was very tough. I cried for 2 weeks trying to get him to latch, but was not successful. Pumping was hard because it is something you have to stay on top of and do every 2 hours. I would get up and pump while my husband fed him the last bottle I pumped. I had to suppliment and it killed me, but we did it.
By the time he was a year I was able to donate to 3 other momma's who could not produce.
With my second, he latched right away and we nurse just fine. His appetite is very large and I really do not want to suppliment so I am trying to pump when possible.
BF'ing is not always easy...but as long as the child is being fed, what does it matter.
Quoting TantricLemons:" What do you think about this article? *************************************************************** ... [snip!] ... to feed a baby, people should be talking about the healthiest option for the family. That's in the best interest of the child."
I didnt read the entire post.
My husband was very glad i gave up BFing as it was a painful struggle. Being honest with myself, it was WAY too difficult from the start and i should have given up sooner.
I personally loved it. I just went through the same thing. I wanted so badly to bf my LO and it took a lot for me to be able to feel comfortable with that decision and with the act as well due to deeply personal reasons. When LO just screamed at the breast 99% of the time and wasn't getting nearly enough when she did latch and getting next to no breast milk from pumping, she had lost almost a pound by the time she was 10 days old. Since I've reluctantly started her on formula she's above her birth weight now and is much happier. I felt like a giant failure though. I still do honestly. I'm trying not to feel that way but it's hard when everywhere I look I feel like I'm being told I am indeed a failure. It also makes me feel incredibly guilty that I didn't try to bf my DD even though it truly was the best decision at the time for many reasons. Reading this makes me feel a little better about the situation because he's right. Women shouldn't be made to feel badly because they can't breast feed, no matter what the reason.
I really feel the opposite about this article. Particularly because I was the only one out of all of my friends and family that breastfed. I feel like there is much more support for formula feeding moms.
One thing that irks me by the article was the father listing all of these things that are great about their lives now that they FF.. All of which equaled being away from the baby more.
Though after reading your comment, that is awesome that he is being so supportive towards his wife in saying breast feeding is the best option, but she did TRY.. I felt like a failure for only making it to six months and barely..most of those months were spent trying to get my supply back, it was the most emotionally exhausting thing I have ever dealt with, a year later I still felt like a failure. But through all of that I had an amazingly supportive husband constantly reminding me that I can never say I didn't try.
It kind of shocks me every time to see the defensiveness people feel about switching to or using formula. Formula feeding isn't failure. They are right, it's just a choice and mental health is most important when both options are acceptable.