Reply
I need advice Carter Wesley's Mommy Due September 19 (girl); 1 child; Cleveland, TX, United States 15 posts
2nd Nov '12

I have a 19 month old boy. He's getting into everything hitting me my mom and the dogs. Nothing seems to break this bad habit. I have tried popping his hands, popping his butt or thigh...even timeout. I understand he's going through the terrible twos but is there anything that could help him before he gets violent with another kid.



He wasn't this bad until a few months ago. This little girl was hitting him all the time but now its gotten so bad that my son has sat on the little girl and pulled her hair (weeks before this same little girl had her little fingers around my son's throat).



Idk what to do about him. I feel as if he's an outta control 1 1/2 year old. Please doesn't any body have any type of advice?

Kelly&Coralie 1 child; Rochester, NY, United States 56008 posts
2nd Nov '12

First off, how does hitting him teach him not to hit?



Redirection, positive reinforcement, rewards for good bahviour, ignoring the bad behaviour.

Smitten Kitten. 4 kids; Florida 155 posts
2nd Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Carter Wesley's Mommy:</b>" I have a 19 month old boy. He's getting into everything hitting me my mom and the dogs. Nothing seems ... [snip!] ... Idk what to do about him. I feel as if he's an outta control 1 1/2 year old. Please doesn't any body have any type of advice?"</blockquote>




My middle child for a while was getting very sassy with EVERYONE. I came across a idea on Pinterest for a glitter time out (where you shake water and glitter and when it settle time out is over) it works and makes her calm and after a couple months she grew out of it (assuming watching the glitter became boring to her).

SavageDarling 3 kids; Webster, Massachusetts 10381 posts
2nd Nov '12

Well common sense says that hitting, or "popping" as you called it, to teach not to hit is pretty counterintuitive. Don't you think? I think time-out would be your first option, not hitting.
And why does he have to be around this little girl?

animaLibera_ 1 child; Ohio 7933 posts
2nd Nov '12

Whenever my daughter hits me I either grab her hands and hold them together and say firmly no hitting looking her straight in the eyes, or I will start fake crying and put my hands on my face and ask her why she hit mommy and tell her she hurt me.



Seems to work pretty well when she realizes that I'm "crying" or if I get mad about her hitting me my tone gets her attention.

Amy {OneGirl, TwoBoys} 3 kids; Cincinnati, Oh, United States 24256 posts
2nd Nov '12

so, you hit him when he hits you? obviously thats not working out.



start time outs, have him sit still for 2 minutes and when its over with, explain "we dont hit mommy because it hurts and makes mommy sad" explain what he is doing

Chellie Due September 19 (boy); 2 kids; Vegas, Nv, United States 4706 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" First off, how does hitting him teach him not to hit? Redirection, positive reinforcement, rewards for good bahviour, ignoring the bad behaviour."


:!:



Hitting a child for hitting does not teach them anything. However with the other girl starting it, is this in day care? If so why have they not taken action against the other child? I would take it up with the teacher/ care provider and demand action be taken.



If this is on supervised visits where you and the other mom are present, talk to the other mom. Or dad if that is the case.



He is only fighting back for what she has done/is doing to him which I can understand and with that being the situation it makes it hard to punish because he thinks he is doing the right thing (especially when you "pop" him for that behavior). At 19 months they do not have a true concept of bad and good yet and are still learning. If he gets punished after the fact he will correlate it with him getting punished for no reason so that will not help the behavior at all either.

Jillian Lindsey 2 kids; Mosheim, Tennessee 2354 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting Carter Wesley's Mommy:" I have a 19 month old boy. He's getting into everything hitting me my mom and the dogs. Nothing seems ... [snip!] ... Idk what to do about him. I feel as if he's an outta control 1 1/2 year old. Please doesn't any body have any type of advice?"

dont listen to people saying not to spank what ever he does to you you do back to him he doesnt realize it hurts if he scatches you do it back same with biting ect you have to stay consistent if he doesnt want to be scatched or biten he will stop doing it to you and other people

Kelly&Coralie 1 child; Rochester, NY, United States 56008 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting Jillian Lindsey:" dont listen to people saying not to spank what ever he does to you you do back to him he doesnt realize ... [snip!] ... biting ect you have to stay consistent if he doesnt want to be scatched or biten he will stop doing it to you and other people"


Um no. It's been proven that that "method" doesn't work.

Jillian Lindsey 2 kids; Mosheim, Tennessee 2354 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting Carter Wesley's Mommy:" I have a 19 month old boy. He's getting into everything hitting me my mom and the dogs. Nothing seems ... [snip!] ... Idk what to do about him. I feel as if he's an outta control 1 1/2 year old. Please doesn't any body have any type of advice?"

pop him on the butt or leg look him in the eyes and firmly say no hitting

SavageDarling 3 kids; Webster, Massachusetts 10381 posts
2nd Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jillian Lindsey:</b>" dont listen to people saying not to spank what ever he does to you you do back to him he doesnt realize ... [snip!] ... biting ect you have to stay consistent if he doesnt want to be scatched or biten he will stop doing it to you and other people"</blockquote>




God i hope ou are trying to be sarcastic. That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my life. Not to mention that it is contradicted by every single child growth and development and child psychology class I have ever taken. Children learn by modeling the behavior they witness. You cannot be serious with this trash advice. You actually bite your children?! What the ever loving f**k?!

SavageDarling 3 kids; Webster, Massachusetts 10381 posts
2nd Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jillian Lindsey:</b>" pop him on the butt or leg look him in the eyes and firmly say no hitting"</blockquote>




You really think the best way to teach a child not to hit is to hit them? Does common sense no longer exist?

animaLibera_ 1 child; Ohio 7933 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting MommaSav2:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Jillian Lindsey:</b>" dont listen to people saying not to spank ... [snip!] ... they witness. You cannot be serious with this trash advice. You actually bite your children?! What the ever loving f**k?!"


:!:

Jillian Lindsey 2 kids; Mosheim, Tennessee 2354 posts
2nd Nov '12
Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" Um no. It's been proven that that "method" doesn't work."

it works for me my nephew used to hit i spanked him maybe 3times hes never raised a hand to anyone again redirection is a bunch of crap yes for a 8month old thats crawling and getting into stuff redirectionis what you need to do but when a child is misbehaving other steps have to be taken and for MommaSav2 yes and i dont give a crap what some phsychologist says i discipline i dont abuse

Carter Wesley's Mommy Due September 19 (girl); 1 child; Cleveland, TX, United States 15 posts
2nd Nov '12

Timeout is always the first action. He doesn't wanna stay there so I pop his thigh and tell him no you're in trouble you gotta stay right there til mommy says its ok. And that little girl is his cousin by marriage. He goes over there with my hubby while Im in school. I have tried covering my face and "crying" telling him he hurt me. Sometimes it works other times it doesn't. Most of the time he laughs and hits me again.