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relationship advice for friend? The One You've Missed 16 kids; Texas 32426 posts
10th Nov '12

This was taken off my friends facebook, and I want to tell her better advice then whats she's getting.. like seriously, she has the stupidest advice ever on there..

Give me some advice mamas, you guys are so much better at this than me!



I truly don't know what to do... I am more in love now than I have ever been in my life and I don't want to lose my man! I've gained weight and it's caused some strain in my relationship because I've been insecure and also I know my man wants me to lose weight and sometimes we fight about it. My insecurity has caused me to feel that he is talking to other women... I messed up and hacked his FB and my insecurities turned out to be true! It hasn't gone as far as physical contact with another woman yet but talking to other women under false pretenses of being single and talking about hooking up is cheating to me! Yes I am very wrong for invading his privacy and I regret that but I did it and yes I confronted him about it. I am in serious pain right now and not knowing what I should do. We both have said that we want to make things work and get through this; but how do we do that when we have both lost the trust we had??? Those of you that know me know that I am not the one to put up with BS but I've never loved like this before either so I find myself in unfamiliar territory. I hate having all my business on FB but I need someone to talk to... Help!

Black Cat 1 child; Marvel, PA, United States 3827 posts
10th Nov '12

My advice is if a man can't love you for who you are, not what you look like, he is not worth it.

Chick+6.5! Due October 18; 6 kids; 1 angel baby; Colorado 7766 posts
10th Nov '12

My advice? If he can't love her at her "worst", he sure as hell doesn't deserve her at her best. Tell her to lose weight for herself, and to start with losing 150+ pounds of idiot.

The One You've Missed 16 kids; Texas 32426 posts
10th Nov '12

Not sure if it matters, but holy crap did she really gain weight..

I don't know why I didn't notice it before, but I just clicked her pictures...

Maybe he should be motivating her in a better way?

Buckeye Due August 13; 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Mt Gilead, Ohio 882 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Miss Brittany:" My advice is if a man can't love you for who you are, not what you look like, he is not worth it."

Totally agree. Heck with the talking to other girls. That at this point is the least of your issues. If he does not love you for who you are then this problem of him looking elsewhere is going to keep popping up.

~The Lunar Flower~ 2 kids; Alabama 6748 posts
10th Nov '12

He needs to decide what he wants & if he wants her then he shouldn't care what she looks like let alone fight with her about her weight! He sounds shallow & he was already looking for other people on facebook of all places. I'd dump him. She may have hacked into his FB but hell he gave her reason to be suspicious. They'll both have to get over the trust issue or try rebuilding it & if he can't keep it in his pants then she doesn't need him

Mrs cree Due November 23; 33 kids; Ontario 1907 posts
10th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Miss Brittany:</b>" My advice is if a man can't love you for who you are, not what you look like, he is not worth it."</blockquote>




This he's an asshole. What would he do if she became ill or disfigured, paralyzed she should leave him

The One You've Missed 16 kids; Texas 32426 posts
10th Nov '12

ok ladies this is what I wrote her: I took bits and pieces of what you ladies said.



Him using your weight gain as an excuse to talk to other girls is inexcusable.. and if he can't love you at your worst, then he shouldnt get you at your best.. it would be really hard to gain that trust back from either of you,and if you lose weight it should be for you.. and no one else.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Chick+6!:" My advice? If he can't love her at her "worst", he sure as hell doesn't deserve her at her best. Tell her to lose weight for herself, and to start with losing 150+ pounds of idiot."


:!:

Black Cat 1 child; Marvel, PA, United States 3827 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Ur Local Frnt Desk Clrk:" Not sure if it matters, but holy crap did she really gain weight.. I don't know why I didn't notice ... [snip!] ... know why I didn't notice it before, but I just clicked her pictures... Maybe he should be motivating her in a better way?"


IMHO, if he really does love her, her weight gain would not cause him to look for "comfort" in other girls.
If he loves her and thinks that maybe her health is at risk because of her weight gain, then maybe he should say something. Talking to other girls is just downright wrong.

Black Cat 1 child; Marvel, PA, United States 3827 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Ur Local Frnt Desk Clrk:" ok ladies this is what I wrote her: I took bits and pieces of what you ladies said. Him using your ... [snip!] ... would be really hard to gain that trust back from either of you,and if you lose weight it should be for you.. and no one else."

Good response!

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Ur Local Frnt Desk Clrk:" ok ladies this is what I wrote her: I took bits and pieces of what you ladies said. Him using your ... [snip!] ... would be really hard to gain that trust back from either of you,and if you lose weight it should be for you.. and no one else."


Fantastic. Perfectly worded. Great job!

MamaCass{+JOE} 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Pennsylvania 42360 posts
10th Nov '12

My advice: Ditch that zero and get with a hero!



Breaks my hearts when women let their insecurities get in the way of being truly happy :(

MamaCass{+JOE} 3 kids; 1 angel baby; Pennsylvania 42360 posts
10th Nov '12
Quoting Ur Local Frnt Desk Clrk:" ok ladies this is what I wrote her: I took bits and pieces of what you ladies said. Him using your ... [snip!] ... would be really hard to gain that trust back from either of you,and if you lose weight it should be for you.. and no one else."


<3

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang 2 kids; Toronto, Ontario 1984 posts
10th Nov '12

What an asshole.
Honestly I get were her insecurities are coming from but he's a douche. I weigh 40lbs more than what I used to when SO and I got together, he has never told me once to lose the weight or has he ever showed me he was disgusted and didn't want to touch me. He loves and accepts me in whatever form I am and he should do that aswell. I would dump his ass and start working out for myself. Nothing is better motivation than to get fit and look better than you ever did in your life to show your douche bag ex what he can no longer have :wink: