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premarital counseling KelseyLynn 1 child; Douglasville, Georgia 555 posts
11th Nov '12

did you do it? How was it? Do you feel it made a difference? How long did it take to complete?

Devil's Advocate Beverly Hills, California 18191 posts
11th Nov '12

We did. It was one night a month for 6 months. It was nice to get our problems out in the open before saying our vows. I think it helped a lot because we were both young. I was 18, he was 20. We've been married for 7 years.

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
11th Nov '12
Quoting KelseyLynn4446:" did you do it? How was it? Do you feel it made a difference? How long did it take to complete?"


We did it. It was great. We took the "compatibility" test and it gave us an idea of what we differ on and how to compliment rather than conflict. The priest then walked us thru the majors in a marriage. Where to live, finances, children religion, ect.... I can't remember how long it was (it was nearly 8 years ago). I know it wasn't the full year like the Catholic Church wanted. We were married in an Episcopal church. I am catholic, he is luthern so we split the difference! lol




Make no mistakes, we still have issues from time to time. That is typical. You just have to remember that any good relationship takes work.

Klaus 2 kids; Mississippi 23764 posts
status 11th Nov '12

We didn't, but I think it would have been nice to. We don't have any major issues or anything, but sometimes I think maybe we still should. There are times when we just don't get each other lol

KelseyLynn 1 child; Douglasville, Georgia 555 posts
11th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Chuck Bass:</b>" We didn't, but I think it would have been nice to. We don't have any major issues or anything, but sometimes I think maybe we still should. There are times when we just don't get each other lol"</blockquote>




I think i should do it & SO doesn't really care if we do or don't. Lol i figure it could be a REALLY good thing. & i totally understand the not getting each other thing. It drives me nuts sometimes.

KelseyLynn 1 child; Douglasville, Georgia 555 posts
11th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Not tellin:</b>" We did it. It was great. We took the "compatibility" test and it gave us an idea of what we differ ... [snip!] ... we still have issues from time to time. That is typical. You just have to remember that any good relationship takes work."</blockquote>




The last part is so so true. I appreciate you answering my questions :)

KelseyLynn 1 child; Douglasville, Georgia 555 posts
11th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Devil's Advocate:</b>" We did. It was one night a month for 6 months. It was nice to get our problems out in the open before ... [snip!] ... saying our vows. I think it helped a lot because we were both young. I was 18, he was 20. We've been married for 7 years. "</blockquote>




I wanna do it mainly cause we both are young. Thank you!

Devil's Advocate Beverly Hills, California 18191 posts
11th Nov '12
Quoting KelseyLynn4446:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Devil's Advocate:</b>" We did. It was one night a month for ... [snip!] ... he was 20. We've been married for 7 years. "</blockquote> I wanna do it mainly cause we both are young. Thank you!"


No problem. We still keep in touch with our counselors and have sat down with them from time to time when things just aren't going right. It is definitely very helpful when you're starting out.

Devil's Advocate Beverly Hills, California 18191 posts
11th Nov '12

And best of luck to you :)

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
11th Nov '12
Quoting KelseyLynn4446:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Not tellin:</b>" We did it. It was great. We took the "compatibility" ... [snip!] ... good relationship takes work."</blockquote> The last part is so so true. I appreciate you answering my questions :)"



Anytime. It was well worth it for us. We have a marriage counselor as well. It never hurts to "refresh" especially when the stresses of the world are getting too heavy!



Congratulations!

*mommy to 3* Due March 7 (girl); 2 kids; Virginia 1167 posts
11th Nov '12
Quoting Not tellin:" Anytime. It was well worth it for us. We have a marriage counselor as well. It never hurts to "refresh" especially when the stresses of the world are getting too heavy! Congratulations!"


What kinds of things do you talk about at your marriage counseling? I would love to go to that with my DH. Not that our marriage is awful or anything but after adding 2 more kids in a year and a half time frame, our relationship has definitely changed. I think itd be great for us to have a safe place to talk about our needs and communication and have someone that can offer perspective for both of us. Does your insurance cover marital counseling?

Not tellin 3 kids; Montana 55983 posts
11th Nov '12
Quoting *mommy to 3*:" What kinds of things do you talk about at your marriage counseling? I would love to go to that with ... [snip!] ... and communication and have someone that can offer perspective for both of us. Does your insurance cover marital counseling?"


Our insurance covers it. Believe it or not, just because you aren't fighting doesn't mean there aren't "issues". lol Basically we do individual apointments to start. I talk about what is on my plate, what bothers me, what I wish for the future ect... Hubby does the same. Then the counselor brings us together and we just talk about basically the same stuff we did privately but he helps us word it so the other can understand. When you are frustrated with someone and they are calling you out on something (say you don't keep up on the household duties) it is easy to miss the real message. Our counselor will also help us find compromises and has no problem saying when something is unacceptable.