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user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12

This might help...some messages I've gotten from guys on POF:



hey how old is ur baby? i hav a 2 yr old do u have any pics of yu 2 together? text me mike (and then his phone number)



I bet your daughter is as lovely as yuo are. I know I'm probably older than you are into but I have a house I have my own car I have my kids every other weekend, you wouldn't have to worry about anything. You could even bring her if you wanted to come up to the city for a good time. Hope to hear from you soon.



hey ! :) i'm greg. i have a baby 2 months old recently single....is your baby daddy still around?




Stuff like this just isn't okay with me. I can't help it if it creeps me out, but it does, and I think I'm allowed to be selective. =/

Emily Thorne 2 kids; Quetzaltenango, Guatemala 26302 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" It wasn't even a date. That was the first message he sent me. "


It would turn me off too, to be honest.... but, you also have to remember that men are stupid and most the times insecure, he is probably looking for a way to compliment you and break the ice.



Like I said, I understand both sides of it, I have guy friends and most are pretty stupid when it comes to picking girls up, and I have met some dumbass single dads!



And my ex also used Novali to pick women up. :(

LolaMcKitten Due May 30 (girl); 27 kids; Beverly Hills, California 15496 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" I think she means that's all they would talk about is her being a mom and stuff. Being complimented ... [snip!] ... complimented on being a parent is great, but if all your date talks about is that you're both parents it would get annoying."


DING DING DING



That right there is what would irk me. I am in no way saying my son and I are not a package deal but I AM a person outside of my life as a mother and if you want to get to know ME, then you should say so other than just pointing out that we are both parents. Thats great, now why else should we get to know each other? And if we're on a DATE or the only thing you can manage to find to talk about is parenting, then maybe we can be friends, but I don't want to date someone who can't be bothered to find out if we're even compatible before saying very forward things like "my kid would love you!".

Emily Thorne 2 kids; Quetzaltenango, Guatemala 26302 posts
15th Nov '12

Blah, this is why I used to pick up guys in bars instead of online! :D:D:D:D

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting she nan igans:" Sure, obviously. But it sounds like she's annoyed that they point that out as as similarity in a message, ... [snip!] ... I mean, what would you prefer OP? They say "hey, your picture makes it look like you have nice tits. Want to go on a date?""


This is the message that I got from the guy I'm talking to right now.



Hey, I'm Jake/Jacob. But my group of friends call me "Swarley". (From a how I met your mother episode) >.
Nice to meet you!
I like your definition of nerdy. My definition is a love or passion to be yourself, and do things that other people mock that you enjoy without a care about what they think or say. By my definition, I'm a huge nerd. I read comic books, play music, build/repair computers, play magic, play WoW and Diablo :P I'm not ashamed of any of it either. I believe everyone needs hobbies to pass time and to keep them sane. (Out of trouble too). I'm working two jobs right now, so when I have time off I'm usually with my son, but you seem really nice. What kind of games are you into? Hope your day is going well!



I really appreciated the time he took to make a thoughtful message, and he let me know he had a kid in a not so in-your-face way. He's really nice and we've been messaging back and forth for a few days now. I don't know why something like this is too much to ask for over one sentence saying "Hey we both have kids let's talk."

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" This is the message that I got from the guy I'm talking to right now. Hey, I'm Jake/Jacob. But my group ... [snip!] ... now. I don't know why something like this is too much to ask for over one sentence saying "Hey we both have kids let's talk.""


Guys are lazy? *shrugs.* They're not women. You can't expect every guy to be ready to sit down and write a novel in the first message they ever send you. And a lot don't want to take the time to write all of that out just to have you snub them like you already seem to be doing. So they send out a feeler message before they go into any more detail.



But that dude sounds nice.

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting LolaMcKitten:" DING DING DING That right there is what would irk me. I am in no way saying my son and I are not a ... [snip!] ... who can't be bothered to find out if we're even compatible before saying very forward things like "my kid would love you!". "


:!:



Also, what would you guys say to "Hey I have a kid, we have a lot in common!" if you went to their profile and honestly, that was the only thing you had to talk about?

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" Guys are lazy? *shrugs.* They're not women. You can't expect every guy to be ready to sit down and write ... [snip!] ... already seem to be doing. So they send out a feeler message before they go into any more detail. But that dude sounds nice."


Once again, I never said I wasn't messaging these guys back. I've actually tried to talk to most of them. The fact that I have absolutely nothing in common with them besides having kids comes from the fact that I have talked to most of them, and I read a profile before I message back.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" :!: Also, what would you guys say to "Hey I have a kid, we have a lot in common!" if you went to their profile and honestly, that was the only thing you had to talk about?"


I would ask them deeper questions about stuff on their profile and possibly stuff that wasn't listed on their profiles that was listed on mine. Like "Hey so I don't see anything about video games or music on your profile. Are you into video games? What kind of music do you listen to? What do you spend your free time doing? If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?" Stuff to find out if you really only have kids in common or if they liked what they read on your profile and agreed with a lot of it.

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" I would ask them deeper questions about stuff on their profile and possibly stuff that wasn't listed ... [snip!] ... to find out if you really only have kids in common or if they liked what they read on your profile and agreed with a lot of it."


I've tried that, and a lot of them stick with it. Like, I'm fine with dating a guy with a kid, but most of them on here just act desperate and it's sad. I don't want them to go out with me because they think I'm all they can get. I deserve a guy regardless of if they have a child the same way they deserve a woman regardless of if they have a child.

JΔS Georgia 70894 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" You have no idea whether I've messaged them or not. You're the one who's making assumptions, now. Did ... [snip!] ... that led to nothing but "You sound like a great mom, my son would love you." etc and red flags like that? I'm guessing not. "


Of course not. Not my fault that you were vague in your OP and didn't think to explain yourself until PAGES into the thread. Aka "I'm making that part up." :lol:

JΔS Georgia 70894 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" This might help...some messages I've gotten from guys on POF: hey how old is ur baby? i hav a 2 yr old ... [snip!] ... this just isn't okay with me. I can't help it if it creeps me out, but it does, and I think I'm allowed to be selective. =/"


That horrid, immature spelling is enough to be selective.

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Jas ♥:" Of course not. Not my fault that you were vague in your OP and didn't think to explain yourself until PAGES into the thread. Aka "I'm making that part up." :lol:"


This was just a rant. I didn't expect people to get so into it that they needed explanations from me. I can't really change your mind if you think I'm making it up, so oh well. Lol.

Drunk Blair Waldorf 2 kids; Alpharetta, Georgia 19208 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Jas ♥:" That horrid, immature spelling is enough to be selective."


:lol:

JΔS Georgia 70894 posts
15th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" This was just a rant. I didn't expect people to get so into it that they needed explanations from me. I can't really change your mind if you think I'm making it up, so oh well. Lol. "


Come on, its BG. You know how we get when we're bored. We pick shit apart :lol: