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Cast Your Vote:

    • Tell the father -- Votes: 32
    • Don't tell the father -- Votes: 57
drunk faith1 1 child; Alabama 10081 posts
16th Nov '12

I wouldn't tell him. Even if we were friends, unless we were dating, I wouldn't tell him. That is something that I wouldn't tell anyone, except maybe my mom.

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" The wife one.... I absolutely agree that was ... [snip!] ... Yes, but I believe that because the woman is going to have her life changed through pregnancy, the onus is hers."


His life was not changed through the abortions?



Obviously, the women were not ready for children, and they did the responsible thing by NOT bringing those children into the world that they could not yet care for, whatever your moral feelings are on abortion.



Both your husband and the women are equally responsible for the pregnancy, and if your husband wanted a child and was completely pro-life, why not discuss that before engaging in sex with a woman that may get pregnant and abort?

Ellie. 34 kids; Arizona 25368 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting [JadeLee]:" Maybe your SO should have used a condom if he did not want his fetuses terminated. Three times he knocked people up, you would think he would have learned."


You're a c**k.

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
16th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" His life was not changed through the abortions? Obviously, the women were not ready for children, ... [snip!] ... a child and was completely pro-life, why not discuss that before engaging in sex with a woman that may get pregnant and abort?"</blockquote>




SO. And, yes his life was effected.



And, prolife/prochoice is not usually a conversation you have with some one you are going to sleep with one or two times. It's not usually the first thing you are thinking about.

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" His life was not changed through the abortions? ... [snip!] ... you have with some one you are going to sleep with one or two times. It's not usually the first thing you are thinking about."


I absolutely agree that it's not generally the first conversation that you have with someone.



That's why, if a woman should "think ahead" about birth control if they aren't ready for a child, then a man should "think ahead" about birth control if he doesn't want a woman to have an abortion after he comes inside her with no protection. IMO, of course.

Ellie. 34 kids; Arizona 25368 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting The Doctor:" I absolutely agree that it's not generally the first conversation that you have with someone. That's ... [snip!] ... birth control if he doesn't want a woman to have an abortion after he comes inside her with no protection. IMO, of course."



Both parties need to be responsible... especially if they are engaging in recreational sex.

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
16th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" I absolutely agree that it's not generally the first conversation that you have with someone. That's ... [snip!] ... birth control if he doesn't want a woman to have an abortion after he comes inside her with no protection. IMO, of course."</blockquote>




I get that and I take precautions because I don't want more children. SO knows my stance but that's because we are both members of NRCL. So, pretty much any guy I date will know because of my affiliations. Not many women are that out.

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting Man. Bear. Pig.:" Both parties need to be responsible... especially if they are engaging in recreational sex."


I agree. No matter whether you're pro choice or pro life... responsibility is important, I think.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 21556 posts
16th Nov '12

Now if I was in a relationship I would tell my SO

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" I absolutely agree that it's not generally ... [snip!] ... we are both members of NRCL. So, pretty much any guy I date will know because of my affiliations. Not many women are that out."


Okay. But, again, I think the question being posed here is why he was irresponsible on multiple occasions, and then blames the women for breaking his heart (sorry, "killing him"). Just as many people ask the same of women who didn't use protection and ended up pregnant, and then are upset that their child(ren)'s father is not around.

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
16th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" Okay. But, again, I think the question being posed here is why he was irresponsible on multiple occasions, ... [snip!] ... same of women who didn't use protection and ended up pregnant, and then are upset that their child(ren)'s father is not around."</blockquote>




I think the only reasonable answer I can give is he was in high school. His wife was the one thatreally hurt.

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" Okay. But, again, I think the question being ... [snip!] ... I think the only reasonable answer I can give is he was in high school. His wife was the one thatreally hurt."


Yeah, and I absolutely understand that. Dishonesty is absolutely unacceptable to me in a relationship, I would rather know the truth, even if the truth hurts.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 21556 posts
16th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" Okay. But, again, I think the question being ... [snip!] ... I think the only reasonable answer I can give is he was in high school. His wife was the one thatreally hurt."</blockquote>



And your SO's situation is the reason I won't sleep with a pro-lifer because I don't want the potential sex partner to be hurt by my decision

Nathan Young 2 kids; Syracuse, New York 57578 posts
16th Nov '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The Doctor:</b>" Okay. But, again, I think the question being ... [snip!] ... I think the only reasonable answer I can give is he was in high school. His wife was the one thatreally hurt."


Oh! And can I ask you a kinda personal question that I've been wondering about? This seems like the opportune moment. haha

Milk Monster 2 kids; Arizona 9089 posts
16th Nov '12


I wouldn't tell him. Of course I'm biased. This is kind of similar to what happened to my uncle, only difference is he was in a relationship. She aborted and told him. He was so hurt by it...