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HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 22501 posts
19th Nov '12

Do not force her into an abortion she will not like you for the rest of your life. As a daughter of a man that walked out on her your child will most likely resent your for the rest of their life. Hopefully your girlfriend will find a MAN that will step up and marry her and adopt your child.

veggie86 TTC since Mar 2014; Somewhere, CA, United States 73 posts
19th Nov '12

You're 17 years old, you shouldn't be getting drunk in the first place. You seem to make one mistake after another. You really need to start growing up, you have a big responsibility on the way.

*TaraT&3peas* Due March 31; 2 kids; Ohio 359 posts
19th Nov '12

Life really does not suck with kids, I mean I see that you are 17 and all you can think about right now is college and partying, and maybe ur even thinking about finances but its really not that bad!! There is assistance out there to help!!!but if you've been with this chick for 2 yrs I find it strange you'd just up and leave her.... If she was someone u just hooked up with at a party thatd be different but youve been with her for 2 yrs man come on....and trust me some girls look hotter after child birth, ive had 2 kids and one on the way and my tits and ass got bigger and my muscles are more tighter in my vagina from using them! but if u truly love a woman you shouldnt be with her for her body man come on..... not to mention you dont HAVE to be with this girl just because shes having your baby, its nice for families to stick together yes, but if you dont love them why stay??? You are perfectly capable of being a dad even if you arent with this girl.... think of how cool it would be to have a little mini-YOU!!! Dads these days are the new SEXY!!!! Trust me.... chicks love guys with kids ;)



What will happen is if you start dating someone in the future and they ask if u have kids, and u say yeah but i dont want that kid, ya know what the chick is gonna say??? Shes gonna say SEE YA LATER DUDE!!!!! And then eventually ur gonna feel guilty and want to be in ur childs life and someday it may be too late and ur child will hold hate for u for not being around!!!

Nanna Boo Boo's Mommy 2 kids; De Pere, Wisconsin 2616 posts
19th Nov '12
Quoting veggie86:" You took the words out of my mouth. EXACTLY what I was going to say."

"Great moms think alike" :)

Nanna Boo Boo's Mommy 2 kids; De Pere, Wisconsin 2616 posts
19th Nov '12
Quoting DeanJade&Maksims Momma:" To be honest, things will never be the way they were... so don't plan on it... I lost a pregnancy with ... [snip!] ... got that love for him back... *Man up and don't say anymore that will potentially hurt ur chances of being a good father later"

:!:

Nanna Boo Boo's Mommy 2 kids; De Pere, Wisconsin 2616 posts
19th Nov '12
Quoting veggie86:" Accident? You tripped, fell, and your p***s landed inside of her?"


:shock:

Katie[ღ]Siℓas 17 kids; Grand Haven, Michigan 2071 posts
19th Nov '12

This whole thread makes me so sad. OP don't make any decisions you're going to regret later. You've already made some obviously, like getting drunk at 17 and having unprotected sex, but now you have to deal with the consequences of those choices you made, and the consequence is a baby. You have a few options, they are:
1. Stay and support your girlfriend through her pregnancy and take care of the child you helped her create. Contrary to popular belief, your life doesn't end just because you have a baby. Your priorities become more important and defined is all, you can still have tons of fun on the side. Plus you will have a little adorable mini-you/girlfriend running around being adorable and hilarious [as most children are while growing up, even if they are a pain sometimes.] You will be there for everything, first crawl, first step, first tooth, first big-kid potty, all of that stuff that is irreplaceable and very special. You won't have to wonder "what if" because you'll know exactly just how special those moments were.




2. Leave and pay child support [that's a certain % of your check every month, gone. My father had to pay 600 a month and would have had to pay more if my mom would've gotten it upped after he got a better job.] have nothing to do with the kid. When you grow up, you will always wonder "what if" and your kid will probably hate your guts.



3. Leave, pay child support [see above.] but stay in the kids life and have limited visitation. You would probably pay less child support this way, but only because you would have the child some of the time so you'd be paying for some expenses out of pocket that wouldn't have gotten taken for child support. Your kid will probably like you a bit better this way but that's not always a guarantee either, and you will most likely always have problems with your [ex] girlfriend because she will hate your guts for abandoning her and your kid.

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
19th Nov '12

Does signing over your rights = you never have to pay child support?



If so, I will never understand why so many women are giving this advice. It takes TWO to make a baby. If abortion is not on the cards, the only thing left to do is stand up and take responsibility. End of a story.



She should've dumped your ass the moment you threatened to leave if she didn't abort. You're disgusting.

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
19th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Clk:</b>" I do wonder why everyone is so mad at a man for not wanting to be a father, most here are supportive in this situation if it was a woman who made the post."</blockquote>




If he doesn't want to be with the mother of the child, or even in the child's life, that's one thing... but to emotionally blackmail her into doing something that's going to stick to her the rest of her life. That's what is disgusting.



If she goes after him for child support, well too bad, that's just how the cookie crumbles.

Gemmas mommy! 1 child; Deposit, New York 1893 posts
19th Nov '12
Quoting Ryloonjimama:" Does signing over your rights = you never have to pay child support? If so, I will never understand ... [snip!] ... End of a story. She should've dumped your ass the moment you threatened to leave if she didn't abort. You're disgusting."


im pretty sure he will have to pay child support either way if she takes him to court for it.

Vivialopod 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42775 posts
19th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ryloonjimama:</b>" Does signing over your rights = you never have to pay child support? If so, I will never understand ... [snip!] ... End of a story. She should've dumped your ass the moment you threatened to leave if she didn't abort. You're disgusting."</blockquote>




no. he just has no say over anything and can't get visitation.

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
19th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Clk:</b>" Women do the exact same thing though without such anger against her on here. It's just sad yet funny to me the double standard. Not necessarily saying specifically you, but in general."</blockquote>




Honestly, people can jump all over me for this but I don't think it's fair that a woman can go and have an abortion without the father getting any say in the matter if he wants it, because while it may be "her body, her choice, it's THEIR baby.



But again, that's just how the cookie crumbles. Life isn't always fair.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 22501 posts
19th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ryloonjimama:</b>" Does signing over your rights = you never have to pay child support? If so, I will never understand ... [snip!] ... End of a story. She should've dumped your ass the moment you threatened to leave if she didn't abort. You're disgusting."</blockquote>




Nope until said child is adopted he is financially responsible.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 22501 posts
19th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Ryloonjimama:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Clk:</b>" Women do the exact same thing though without such ... [snip!] ... it may be "her body, her choice, it's THEIR baby. But again, that's just how the cookie crumbles. Life isn't always fair."</blockquote>




Just how it works.

MX23 Japan 674 posts
19th Nov '12
Quoting Gemmas mommy!:" yes it took both of you, shes stepping up. your not. if all you plan on doing is paying child support ... [snip!] ... dad, gone. thats what your doing to your child... can you imagine how painful thats going to be for your kid to go through... "


well actually my parents werent around much cause they were always busy working. they started a business and were always there and still work a ton of hours or travel alot. yeah they bought me tons of shit and i get whatever i ask for. they are even gone this week. i was gonna spend thanksgiving at my gfs house but i dont think i will now.