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Pointless Post... user banned
24th Nov '12

My adopted mom (my aunt, dad's sister) got temporary custody of me when I was two. Or so I thought. Apparently I was wrong, and I hadn't even turned a year old when my real mom left.



I know it shouldn't be a big deal, but for some reason, that year really makes a difference.



I've battled bipolar disorder, severe PPD, and fibromyalgia as a single mom, and still made it to a year with DD. She had a great husband (at the time anyway) who was working two jobs, and even paid a nanny to come in so that she didn't have to wake up early with me or my half brother.



Part of me says I should feel better about myself, but the other part of me says I should worse about my life.



I don't know what to think. This post means nothing to anyone that doesn't know me, so sorry for the randomness. It's just hitting me really hard for some reason, and I can't exactly post on FB.

I'm me 4 kids; Kentucky 3109 posts
24th Nov '12

was it your bio mom or adopted mom that had a nanny?

user banned 3 kids; Texas 26201 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" My adopted mom (my aunt, dad's sister) got temporary custody of me when I was two. Or so I thought. Apparently ... [snip!] ... know me, so sorry for the randomness. It's just hitting me really hard for some reason, and I can't exactly post on FB. "


Just think about how much greater of a mom you are and will be. I could never walk out on my kids... I made them, birthed them.. I want to watch them grow and learn. Life is full of lessons, easy and hard.. and kids will test you.



I know how the void feels of not having your mom there and im sure thats what you are feeling. Im sorry you have to go through this :(

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting I'm me:" was it your bio mom or adopted mom that had a nanny?"


Biomom. It's almost like a family gag that she never had to wake up before 12 while she was married to my dad. She had issues herself and "just couldn't do it".

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14109 posts
24th Nov '12

I don't know you, but I can understand why you'd be a little upset. It's never pleasant to think about your own mother not being able to take care of you. Maybe she had severe PPD as well? Some women with PPD don't want anything to do with their child until they get help.

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Living-Dead Girl:" Just think about how much greater of a mom you are and will be. I could never walk out on my kids... ... [snip!] ... how the void feels of not having your mom there and im sure thats what you are feeling. Im sorry you have to go through this :("


She's in my life now, but I didn't meet her until I was 17. She's not exactly a motherly figure, you know? And I know every mom's goal is to raise their kids a little better and a little happier, but f**k she set the bar really low.

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Supafly★:" I don't know you, but I can understand why you'd be a little upset. It's never pleasant to think about ... [snip!] ... of you. Maybe she had severe PPD as well? Some women with PPD don't want anything to do with their child until they get help. "


You're probably right. I just..Idk. I battle with some things myself, and my thoughts always go to "I don't want Addie to think she wasn't enough." and it's like...my childhood just hit me right smack in the face. I thought I was over this. Idk.

user banned 3 kids; Texas 26201 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" She's in my life now, but I didn't meet her until I was 17. She's not exactly a motherly figure, you ... [snip!] ... And I know every mom's goal is to raise their kids a little better and a little happier, but f**k she set the bar really low. "


Oh wow... :/ I dont think everyone can hack it. It takes a lot to be a mom and its very hard. I hear a lot from girls about how they wish they didnt have kids just yet... or how their kids put a kink in their plans. I think its awesome to spend time with my kids...



But PPD is serious and if you are having issues, get the help. Your mom may have been in denial that she had anything wrong with her when it was obvious. <3

user banned 33 kids; Blytheville, Arkansas 7534 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Living-Dead Girl:" Oh wow... :/ I dont think everyone can hack it. It takes a lot to be a mom and its very hard. I hear ... [snip!] ... having issues, get the help. Your mom may have been in denial that she had anything wrong with her when it was obvious. <3"


I wish I had had DD later and I feel guilty that we're in the situation we're in now, but only because I can't provide for her like I could if I'd done this, say, once I was married and out of school. She doesn't slow me down really. I was always a pretty boring person lol. My adopted mom doesn't mind watching her for a few hours a weekend either so if I want to go out to a show or something, I can go.

user banned 3 kids; Texas 26201 posts
24th Nov '12
Quoting Chroma Hex [+1]:" I wish I had had DD later and I feel guilty that we're in the situation we're in now, but only because ... [snip!] ... mom doesn't mind watching her for a few hours a weekend either so if I want to go out to a show or something, I can go. "



I know how that is. I had my first at 19 and never really got to be an adult or anything. I felt for the longest time that I was robbed of freedom. The older I got the more I realized going out and partying wasnt such a cool thing. Im glad I realized it :)




And thats awesome! Everyone needs a break! Im stuck in the hospital cause my water broke at 27 weeks (28 now) and my mother in law took our son for a few days. I felt lost the day he left because im so used to being around him 24/7 (Hubby is staying in the hospital with me)



I cant wait for tomorrow to get my pain in the butt back :)

Bangarang 10 kids; Muthafuckin, GA, United States 26658 posts
24th Nov '12

It's just all the more reason to feel better about yourself as a mother! Some women aren't cut out to be mothers. Yours wasn't, but you are. I'm sorry you found this out and I'm sorry your mom didn't stick around. Mine left not even a year after my dad got custody of us. I know it's nowhere near the same thing but that just made me want to be that much better when the time comes. You're doing a great job, especially under your circumstances, and you should be proud that you have been able to get this far. It has to be hard to have those issues and still be a single mom. I have bipolar and anxiety and I always worry about how I'll be as a parent. Being on here has shown that I can still be amazing.

⚓Misty⚓ 4 kids; Keenesburg, Colorado 7276 posts
1st Dec '12

Hey i havent seen u on in awhile. Hope everythings going good