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Rafael's Mommy ♥ Texas 764 posts
26th Nov '12

Where I live, you can be on home bound for a lot of things - if you're in the hospital for a long time or something like that. It's not like its a special privilege for pregnant teens.

Fatty McRunnerPants 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Clearlake, California 59390 posts
26th Nov '12
Quoting justanothamotha:" I am baffled by those who think newborns are a breeze & that school is so easy. You all must have ... [snip!] ... but the fact is, NO ONE benefits from separating a newborn from mom at 2 weeks old...no one - so there is no sense in doing it."



Eh, I finished college with a newborn in tow... twice (once for my AA, once for my BA). I had my daughter a month before I should have, fucked up everything. So inbetween walking 2 miles to the NICU after a csection, beginning the day after she was born, and taking care of a 3 year old I finished my schoolwork as well. It's really not that hard.



It's not about "punishing" the teenager. It's about not allowing them to skate. We give teenagers so much leeway already. But, IMO, once they decide to be adults and do adult things they should be treated like adults. Finishing HS, keeping up with class with a newborn is the least of what they should be doing.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
26th Nov '12

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Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" "So I suppose I think we should find a way to help young moms finish their schooling while not trying ... [snip!] ... of today's society. People like you think they shouldn't be held accountable for their actions. I find THAT disgusting. "


I said " NO ONE benefits from separating a newborn from mom at 2 weeks old...no one - so there is no sense in doing it."



So show me the benefit.



I never said no should be held accountable - but early separation of mother & newborn is not about accountability & having NO sense of compassion about it IS trying to punish someone.



Explain how giving 4 more weeks of time with the baby is NOT being "held accountable"?



I had 6 weeks off with my 1st (I was working then) - I certainly don't feel like anyone else has ever had to pick up slack for me...nor do I think my employer should have "held me accountable" for my choice to have a baby by requiring I return to work in 2 weeks or loose my job.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
26th Nov '12
Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" Eh, I finished college with a newborn in tow... twice (once for my AA, once for my BA). I had my daughter ... [snip!] ... should be treated like adults. Finishing HS, keeping up with class with a newborn is the least of what they should be doing."

It is a fact of life that all people have varying degrees of abilities (mental, emotional, physical). If you think yours are at the bare minimum - what does that say about what you think of yourself? If you believe yourself more capable than others, then you should understand not everyone could do what you did. You can't have it both ways. If what you did is something to be proud of - that implies it is above & beyond. if it is just standard & to be expected - then it's nothing to be proud of.

Fatty McRunnerPants 2 kids; 4 angel babies; Clearlake, California 59390 posts
27th Nov '12
Quoting justanothamotha:" It is a fact of life that all people have varying degrees of abilities (mental, emotional, physical). ... [snip!] ... of - that implies it is above & beyond. if it is just standard & to be expected - then it's nothing to be proud of."


You were saying that you're baffled by those who feel newborns are a breeze and that HS is just sooo easy. I was explaining why I feel that keeping up with HIGH SCHOOL schoolwork with a child shouldn't be too far fetched. Because I feel that what I did after I had my daughter was what I had to do (although, I conceed I am one tough b***h). I feel that every parent should do what they have to do. It's to be expected. People get into the mindset of "oh woe is me, poor me, had a baby at 16 and can't get my pre algebra homework done booo whooo whooo". Yeah, sorry. No sympathy. Keeping up with High School homework is the least of what should be expected of a teen parent.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
27th Nov '12
Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" You were saying that you're baffled by those who feel newborns are a breeze and that HS is just sooo ... [snip!] ... Yeah, sorry. No sympathy. Keeping up with High School homework is the least of what should be expected of a teen parent."

That is assuming a high schooler has "pre-algebra". I am not sure what you classes took in high school - but pre-algebra is a grade 7 where I am from & that isn't considered advanced - that's pretty average. They call it "college prep" here - so taking anything lesser is pretty much considered for kids with learning difficulties. It is quite possible though that different school systems set very different expectations.



When I went to college I actually had more free time than in high school - because mt college classes ate up much less of my day & had less homework required. Part of perception here may be what each person's high school experience was. My experience in high school was working much harder for lesser grades & acing college while taking full time classes & holding down a full time job. To me it would have been much easier to juggle a baby in college than high school.



I also think that despite the whole "suck it up" idea, we, as a society, should care about whether or not something "works". Ideally you want any parent to bond with their child & to raise emotionally & mentally healthy children as well as maintaining emotional health themselves. There is far too much evidence that early mother infant bonding is important to ignore it as a matter of the *mother* needing to do what she needs to do. What about what an infant needs for optimal growth & development? Do you really mean to say you think it is in the best interest of any infant to start separations from mom as early as 2 weeks or sooner? That is what I don't get - I dont' see who exactly is supposed to be seeing a benefit from such as short maternity leave. Is it society? The mother "learning her lesson" about what it means to be a mother? Is it the baby? Who is to gain from such a short time to spend bonding?



THAT is why I see it as a punishment attitude. If no one is to gain & the only point is she doesn't "deserve" time to recover & bond, then it is not done at all for any of the "right" reasons & boils down to judgement & just being mean because we can.

κατι 1 child; Memphis, Tennessee 3143 posts
27th Nov '12

Yes they should get a break from school,they need to be home with their lo for atleast 2 weeks bonding.