I've had sooo many issues with my mother and mother in law taking over. They buy so many things and do everything for me. For most people, this would be a blessing, but I've had such an easy pregnancy that it drives me crazy!! My husband recently deployed but before he left country, I got to travel down and see him. My mother has a key and went to my house and completely deep cleaned the entire house! While I was gone, my nesting REALLY kicked in but when I got home, I had absolutely nothing to do! My mother in law is a nurse and tries to give me all this ridiculous advice about pregnancy all the time. She had gestational diabetes with my husband, who ended up being a 10 pound baby, and had a c-section. She now tells me all of her horror stories about her terrible pregnancy and how terrifying having a c-section was. I understand they mean well, but in their own ways, it's almost like they're kind of making things harder on me. It doesn't help that they don't get along, at all. My baby shower was a disaster because my mother in law was upset that it wasn't at her house. Talk about drama!! Plus they both get upset with me anytime one gets something for the baby that the other didn't get a chance to get first. Does anyone else have these problems? I have no idea what to do about all this and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. My dad tells me all the time that my mom is going over board but neither of us want to say anything. Both sides are very, VERY sensitive....HELP!!!! :(
Quoting Brittney Fulbright:" I've had sooo many issues with my mother and mother in law taking over. They buy so many things and do ... [snip!] ... time that my mom is going over board but neither of us want to say anything. Both sides are very, VERY sensitive....HELP!!!! :("
Sorry, but I'd be a little grateful that they've helped you out. The nesting part, yeah, that sucks, but go clean out your car or something.
Tell them what you just wrote. It's not being mean, but its making things stressful.
Nip it now or it'll carry over w ur kid. Been there. My oldest is almost 4 n just recently my mom has stopped being super jealous of my mil having bought everything almost 4 yrs ago!!!!! I have major probs w mil overstepping boundaries w our kids. She bought dd 1s coming hm outfit w.o telling us. She tried it w dd 2 but hubby n I talked to her. I wanted to buy dd 1s 1st bday dress she knew I was ordering it n she bought one instead. Didn't give her chance to do it again w dd 2. Be gentle yet firm. It's ur pregnancy n ur baby. They had their turn now its urs.
Yeah, I had the exact same thing happen to me at the end of my pregnancy. It made me really bitter. But in the end, I told them how I felt, ignored their competitive bullshit and really enjoyed the nice things they were trying to do. Mostly.
But definitely stand up for yourself sooner rather than later. Or it will continue after your LO is born.
I would just tell them that there are some things you would like to do yourself. But, let them know you appreciate everything they are doing & your glad they are so excited.
I think (if they are anything like my mom) they would like to baby you, because here soon you are going to have to be taking care of a baby & won't have any time to yourself. I enjoy it most of the time, but I do see where them not letting you do anything gets aggravating.
shut up and be grateful! What you don't use, donate.
I'm not a confrontational person. I have donated a lot of things, and that just makes them upset because I didn't keep everything they got. If you feel like posting something rude, please just don't post at all. I didn't ask to be criticized. I just don't know how to approach them without them freaking out on me.
Quoting Brittney Fulbright:" I'm not a confrontational person. I have donated a lot of things, and that just makes them upset because ... [snip!] ... just don't post at all. I didn't ask to be criticized. I just don't know how to approach them without them freaking out on me."
if you can't take criticism for being ungrateful, don't post your dirty laundry.
You are completely ungrateful and need to just shut up and take what they give you. Not everyone has such generous people on their lives and would kill to be in your shoes.
My mother in law is like this, (even the nurse part, giving me advice ALL the time), but I guess I take what I can get, she even goes to the extent to clean my house, when it is already clean. I just told her that I appreciate the gifts, but do like to be somewhat independent, and If i ever need anything I will definately let her know. She took it pretty well