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Body Type/Size mehhhhh Minnesota 368 posts
26th Nov '12

This is a topic I've been trying my damnedest to avoid making, but jeez, I just can't help my self.



Pre-pregnancy, I was a relatively small person. I'm not going to put my weight or anything, because someone might be triggered by it, nor will I include pictures like I originally planned.



Anyways, this is kind of a "where is the middle ground" debate.
I'm always seeing quotes about how men like curves and only dogs like bones, or other "skinny-shaming" posts.



But on the same note, there are a lot of people who put down "curvy" women, insisting they must be lazy overeaters to be the size that they are. Even if that was the case, I don't understand why it's anyone's business.



Either way, food for though;



Where is the middle-ground? When does body-shaming stop?

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
26th Nov '12
Quoting Monika Dawn:" This is a topic I've been trying my damnedest to avoid making, but jeez, I just can't help my self. ... [snip!] ... understand why it's anyone's business. Either way, food for though; Where is the middle-ground? When does body-shaming stop?"



Yep, there is a lot of size shaming in both directions. It's very sad and shouldn't happen either way. I wish women would stop trying to make themselves feel better by putting down others. Instead of trying to make other peopel "worse" why not just work on accepting YOU. Everyone doesn't have to look the same or weigh the same for it all to be okay.

Ronnie RadKat 4 kids; Arizona 21899 posts
26th Nov '12

Never... People will always cut down others to try to raise their own self esteem.

Ellie. 34 kids; Arizona 25371 posts
26th Nov '12

I think it's sick when bigger women try to say that skinnier women aren't beautiful because they're too small or skin and bones. I've been fat and I know what that feels like to be thought of negatively. Both sides need to knock it off and worry about themselves and making sure they're as healthy as they can be.

mehhhhh Minnesota 368 posts
26th Nov '12

It's tragic, honestly.



I've been in all three categories of the weight spectrum. I've been overweight, underweight and the recommended weight for my height. When I was overweight, I was disgusting and needed to lose weight. So I went down to the recommended weight for my height and build. Was told I either needed to lose or gain weight. In confusion, I forced myself to lose more weight and got to the point of needing hospitalization.



In my opinion, everyone should be happy with how they are, or if they aren't, do something (healthy) to get to where they would love themselves if they can't do it just the way they are.



I keep hoping enough will be enough one day, and weight/size won't play a factor into how people judge someone else. Judgement will always fall, or at least I assume so.
But weight shouldn't be anyone's business but that person and, if need be, their doctor.

user banned 1 child; New Orleans, Louisiana 18159 posts
26th Nov '12

There's no middle ground. Skinny to one person could be average or overweight to another. Instead of body shaming women should either embrace what they have or work to better themselves.

Perfectly Imperfect :P 1 child; California 146 posts
26th Nov '12
Quoting Man. Bear. Pig.:" I think it's sick when bigger women try to say that skinnier women aren't beautiful because they're too ... [snip!] ... of negatively. Both sides need to knock it off and worry about themselves and making sure they're as healthy as they can be."

This is so true! I'm very petite and I've been through that being called skinny and nmes like that, I honestly believe every woman is beautiful as long as their healthy and happy with themselves it should not matter, but there will always be those mean people who put down others :/

EnnaBennaBanana Due February 2; 2 kids; Maryland 6195 posts
26th Nov '12
Quoting Monika Dawn:" This is a topic I've been trying my damnedest to avoid making, but jeez, I just can't help my self. ... [snip!] ... understand why it's anyone's business. Either way, food for though; Where is the middle-ground? When does body-shaming stop?"


I've always been very small and I've had people call me "skelator" or just "bones" It really would hurt my feelings. I was about 90 pounds in highschool and couldn't gain. Now normally I'm around 105 and find that seems to be a better average for me. I think making fun of people big or small is not good...if you feel someone is to big or to small leave them alone..don't make people feel bad about themselves. If there is a health concern talk to them in a loving manner about it.

mamaluvsher4babies 36 kids; California 4230 posts
26th Nov '12

I never want to be the size I was in high school..I was wayyy to skinny. I look at pics and think :damn looked like I was on drugs" I was a size 0-3. I am happy at a size 7. I like curves. I could careless what men like.If a man doesnt like you for you then screw him. I met my husband when I was in my jammies LOL..which at the time consist of short shorts and a tank top. Those shorts couldnt go over my knees now :(

brooke_x 1 child; Australia 144 posts
26th Nov '12

Ughhh I hate this! If I see a good looking woman or slimmer girl then myself, I say to myself "wow, I can appreciate her good looks", instead of shaming her to make myself feel better. Women need to stick together instead of just being rude because of being self conscious about themselves.

Fat-and-Happy TTC since Mar 2008; 1 child; Texas 13915 posts
27th Nov '12

The middle ground is where we all decide to appreciate all body types for the unique beauty they hold.



I can't stand the things putting down skinny people are the vice versa.



A lot of the sayings like the one you mentioned and those like them come from a place of deep resentment towards thinner girls for the fat stigma that fat people live under. It is probably also rooted in some jealousy.

DisneyMommy 34 kids; Florida 6301 posts
27th Nov '12

I hate body shaming.....and being fat, i loathe when other big women put down skinny women. I dont like putting down women for anything, period.



And as for what men love, men love it ALL. SOme men like curves, some men like slender, some men like super size BBW, some men like athletic, some men have preferences that have nothing to do with size, some men like anyone who likes them, some men care more about other attributes and dont give a damn about size,
saying men only like this or that is ridiculous, and shows you dont know men very well, lol.

Ellie. 34 kids; Arizona 25371 posts
27th Nov '12
Quoting Fat-and-Happy:" The middle ground is where we all decide to appreciate all body types for the unique beauty they hold. ... [snip!] ... resentment towards thinner girls for the fat stigma that fat people live under. It is probably also rooted in some jealousy."


I couldn't agree more with that. When larger or normal sized women put down "skinny" girls, I fully believe it's from jealousy.

GTFOGTFO 6 kids; Italy 5611 posts
27th Nov '12

I have been on both sides of extremes and everywhere in between. I went from chubby through my school years, then I went through a disorder and was sickly thin. By my second pregnancy, I gained a lot of weight and kept it on after. Now I am 25 pounds down from losing weight in a healthy way, and yesterday (I even made a post about this) my aunt's boyfriend came up to me and said, "Wow, you've gotten fat!" :roll:



I don't think there is ever a middle ground. It seems like the majority of people are unhappy with where there body is, whether too big or too small. Media and marketing has shoved it down our throats, seeing things growing up that "Thin was in", then there was, "Curvy is more desirable" hype. Remember when huge fake b**bs were "in" and now a lot of people want the "perfect" ass? Women have been convinced that we are sex objects and our bodies need to be shaped in a way that is most desirable to our partners.