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I'm probably stupid The Bear and The Bird 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42577 posts
27th Nov '12

But I just can't quit things with my ex without more effort.



I have been a f**king mess the past two days, crying and barely sleeping and not having much appetite. Last night I decided to talk to Michael on Friday and discuss a "do-over". I want to see if we can put everything aside and focus on building a foundation for our relationship. I think things moved too fast and too much fear, anger, resentment, and miscommunication built up for us to get over.



I want us to stay separated, but start casually dating again. Just a few hours every other weekend to reconnect as adults and friends, and see where it goes from there. At the very least I want to feel closer with him so we make a better team as parents when the baby comes.



My friends think I should let it go because there's nothing worth salvaging, but I remember how he acted before and just after we found out I was pregnant and I think THAT relationship is worth fighting for. I'm hoping with his new job that has better pay, less stress, and less hours, and less stress about our relationship will allow him to ease up, relax, and be willing to work on things with me.



And if not at least I will KNOW he's no good for me and I can move on without constantly wondering if I gave up to soon on a good thing. And my appetite is back and I slept peacefully last night now that I have a plan.

wannaknow 2 kids; California 475 posts
27th Nov '12
Quoting dat uterus tho:" But I just can't quit things with my ex without more effort. I have been a f**king mess the past two ... [snip!] ... if I gave up to soon on a good thing. And my appetite is back and I slept peacefully last night now that I have a plan."


That is something only you can decide, and it sounds like you have. Good luck!!

Mother of One plus One 2 kids; Ware Shoals, South Carolina 4418 posts
27th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting dat uterus tho:</b>" But I just can't quit things with my ex without more effort. I have been a f**king mess the past two ... [snip!] ... if I gave up to soon on a good thing. And my appetite is back and I slept peacefully last night now that I have a plan."</blockquote>




No one can tell you what to do. They were not in the relationship and sometimes people on the outside only see the bad. If YOU want to fight for the relationship and so does he,you are doing the right thing for you. And if it doesn't work out atleast you know you tried and gave it every option to succeed. Good Luck. O)

Wife and Mommy of 4 4 kids; California 804 posts
27th Nov '12

Good luck, and I hope everything works out for you.

Hairspray 18 kids; Ohio 7391 posts
27th Nov '12

I'm in the same situation right now. I'm head over heels for my ex and want to give it another shot. He's a little against it but said he's open to the idea.

Hope for the best for you guys.

Noah and Baby J's mommy 50 kids; Oregon 3446 posts
27th Nov '12

This is exactly what I'm going thought. Is it worth the fight and will things ever change.

♥cuppycake♥ 4 kids; Jacksonville, Florida 446 posts
27th Nov '12

i was in the same situation, we separated for a while and during we slowly started to date and get close again.we both needed space to figure out what we wanted and we realized that our marriage was worth a second shot.now we communicate better and our relationship is a lot stronger.good luck i hope it goes well for you.

Emily Thorne 2 kids; Quetzaltenango, Guatemala 26302 posts
27th Nov '12

i think you are doing the right thing. If you don't do this you'll always wonder "what if", right?



You need to try. I hope things work out!

Back to Noob Status Ohio 14048 posts
27th Nov '12

It is worth a shot, but I don't want you to get your hopes up so high only for them to crash, ykwim? Hopefully, once the baby is born, things will change for the positive.

The Bear and The Bird 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42577 posts
27th Nov '12

I have no idea if he'll even go for it, I don't see him pretty much at all during the days he works and I want to set aside a good chunk of time to work things through, so I may very well be back to square one by Saturday. But we'll see.



I definitely want to stay separated until after the baby is born and he has confirmation that it's his, since that lack of trust is still a huge issue. But I hope we can work things out as roommates because honestly if we're not living together he's never going to see this kid. He just works too much.