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Pregnancy Rant about Husband Jill Maddox Due December 20 (boy); 1 child; Dallas, Texas 16 posts
30th Nov '12

the other night, my DH and I got into an argument. He made several plans this weekend with his guy buddies to go over to one of their houses and play video games on Saturday, and then on Sunday, go shooting at the gun range with another buddy. He just went out for a guys night last week, drinking and playing video games!
I am 37 weeks pregnant, so I'm not doing a lot but resting at home these days. Is it too much to ask for him to be there with me? so I'm not lonely and by myself? Plus, his birthday is next week, and Christmas is right around the corner, as well as our due date, so I want him to be home with me to prepare for everything that's coming up.
When I brought the subject up after he made the gun range plans, he got mad at me for being "too needy" and "needing attention". I have told him this pregnancy was supposed to be a partnership, something we both wanted, and he hasn't done much to support that. (i.e. he drinks beer 4-5/week in front of me, knowing that I can't drink...not that its a huge deal, but its just a constant "throw it in your face" kinda thing). We are better now, a few days later...he has canceled the gun range, but it still upsets me that he doesn't think about this sort of thing until I have to point it out to him. Opinions please?

Phallus Cranium cocksuck, LA, Sri Lanka 108822 posts
status 30th Nov '12

Honestly, I think he should enjoy his "guy time" now while he can

It's not going to be the same once the baby comes.

and while misery loves company, I think it would be nice if you would not make a big deal about it.

katxo 18 kids; Florida 7270 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Jill Maddox:" the other night, my DH and I got into an argument. He made several plans this weekend with his guy buddies ... [snip!] ... but it still upsets me that he doesn't think about this sort of thing until I have to point it out to him. Opinions please?"


Maybe he wants some free time before the baby comes? When the baby comes you both are going to be consumed in taking care of LO and eachother, plus the whole not getting sleep and going out ever comes into play. I wouldn't be that upset about it. He's a guy, they definitely don't think the way we do

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
30th Nov '12

It's going to be really great when he is hammered and you go into labor.



My husband did the same thing when I was pregnant and then I went into labor when he was out with his buddies drinking.

bloopbloop♥ 1 child; Illinois 13887 posts
status 30th Nov '12

It sounds like you will just do nothing at home. Preparing is more for you than him. He doesn't see the need...:P



Let the dude breath, lol. Use his time out to hang out with friends or cousins...SO what if he drinks beer let him! He can...you will be able to eventually.

Amanda.M 2 kids; St Albans, Vermont 890 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" Honestly, I think he should enjoy his "guy time" now while he can It's not going to be the same once ... [snip!] ... once the baby comes. and while misery loves company, I think it would be nice if you would not make a big deal about it."


Agreed!! Even though I am prolly going to be saying the same thing about my SO in the future.

Disney Mamma Due June 2; 1 child; Wasilla, Alaska 415 posts
30th Nov '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jill Maddox:</b>" the other night, my DH and I got into an argument. He made several plans this weekend with his guy buddies ... [snip!] ... but it still upsets me that he doesn't think about this sort of thing until I have to point it out to him. Opinions please?"</blockquote>




Let him go. You don't want be miserable wishing he was with his friends the entire weekend.Also don't expect it to change when the baby gets here because it won't. My DH goes fishing every single weekend all summer long.

katxo 18 kids; Florida 7270 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Disney Mamma:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Jill Maddox:</b>" the other night, my DH and I got into an argument. ... [snip!] ... don't expect it to change when the baby gets here because it won't. My DH goes fishing every single weekend all summer long."


Not all husbands are the same, so who is to say he will do the same thing as your husband?

Jill Maddox Due December 20 (boy); 1 child; Dallas, Texas 16 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" Honestly, I think he should enjoy his "guy time" now while he can It's not going to be the same once ... [snip!] ... once the baby comes. and while misery loves company, I think it would be nice if you would not make a big deal about it."


wow...i thought i would get some sympathy being pregnant with OUR child...not told to just ignore it and let him do what he wants to do. I don't get to do what I want to do because I'm pregnant.

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Jill Maddox:" wow...i thought i would get some sympathy being pregnant with OUR child...not told to just ignore it and let him do what he wants to do. I don't get to do what I want to do because I'm pregnant."


Tell him you want a date night. He shouldn't be the only one going out and having fun before the baby is born.

katxo 18 kids; Florida 7270 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Jill Maddox:" wow...i thought i would get some sympathy being pregnant with OUR child...not told to just ignore it and let him do what he wants to do. I don't get to do what I want to do because I'm pregnant."


I didn't read anything where we said to ignore it, I just think you're being overly sensitive, since you're pregnant. You're the one that chose to be pregnant, and you knew the consequences before you got knocked up, so why are you complaining about it?

Brittanie Blokker-Brandt Due August 20 (girl); 2 kids; Oklahoma City, Oklahoma 324 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Jill Maddox:" wow...i thought i would get some sympathy being pregnant with OUR child...not told to just ignore it and let him do what he wants to do. I don't get to do what I want to do because I'm pregnant."


dont ignore it, I wouldnt. I did the first time and then it progressed into him not taking up his part of the responsibility with our son because he wanted to go and do whatever he wanted. It was "my" job to take care of him. It caused huge issues and we almost lost our marriage over it. Take care of it now or it can grow to something bigger. He can go out once in a while, thats fine, but it doesnt mean you need to be constantly stranded and alone.

Brittanie Blokker-Brandt Due August 20 (girl); 2 kids; Oklahoma City, Oklahoma 324 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting katxo:" I didn't read anything where we said to ignore it, I just think you're being overly sensitive, since ... [snip!] ... one that chose to be pregnant, and you knew the consequences before you got knocked up, so why are you complaining about it?"


she didnt choose to be pregnant on her own, its a joint thing, they're married and got into it together. Its not too much to ask to have someone that wants to be there for you when you're married to them, thats the whole point, its a partnership. Going out sometimes is great, get it out, but to do it all the time at this late in pregnancy, its not something Id be happy about either

Jill Maddox Due December 20 (boy); 1 child; Dallas, Texas 16 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting katxo:" I didn't read anything where we said to ignore it, I just think you're being overly sensitive, since ... [snip!] ... one that chose to be pregnant, and you knew the consequences before you got knocked up, so why are you complaining about it?"


no, actually we planned this pregnancy and chose TOGETHER to get pregnant. it was a joint decision, therefore it should be a continued partnership for the duration

katxo 18 kids; Florida 7270 posts
30th Nov '12
Quoting Brittanie Blokker-Brandt:" she didnt choose to be pregnant on her own, its a joint thing, they're married and got into it together. ... [snip!] ... sometimes is great, get it out, but to do it all the time at this late in pregnancy, its not something Id be happy about either"

Exactly, it's two people that made a baby and he should be able to do what he wants to do too. I'm sure he has his own side of the story as well. I still think he should be able to go out and hang with his friends, I mean she is due within the next month. I don't see it as a big deal, and neither did a majority of the other women who made comments on it.