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greenmamabecky☮ TTC since Jul 2013; 18 kids; Enfield, Connecticut 20984 posts
3rd Dec '12
Quoting Penises 3:Vaginas 1:" That's not true. Without a legal custody agreement, with his name on the BC he has JOINT custody of said child and if he got a hold of him/her he doesn't legally have to give them back. "


This is not totally true. In MA it doesn't matter if he's on the birth certificate or not. Since we were not married when our son is born he has no rights until we establish them through court. If he tried to take our son it would be kidnapping.
It's like that in other states too although I don't know which ones.
OP you should talk to a lawyer and see what can be done.

1 child; Japan 482 posts
3rd Dec '12

If i dont have to let him see his son, and i have the texts of him saying that he doesnt want anything to do with him should i jst wait it out and see if files and show my texts in court?

greenmamabecky☮ TTC since Jul 2013; 18 kids; Enfield, Connecticut 20984 posts
3rd Dec '12
Quoting D.M:" If i dont have to let him see his son, and i have the texts of him saying that he doesnt want anything to do with him should i jst wait it out and see if files and show my texts in court?"


Does he do drugs? Have a record? What exactly do you have against him?
I think you should seriously call a lawyer and get a consultation with them. Mine did a 1 hr free consultation because SO took me to court for joint custody after we split up. He was on drugs though and failed his tests so he didnt get shit. He's clean now and when we go back this month he'll be getting joint custody which is fine by me at this point.
Either way, the lawyer will tell you what chances you have in court, what the laws are in your state, etc etc.

1 child; Japan 482 posts
3rd Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Will☮Creedence:</b>" Does he do drugs? Have a record? What exactly do you have against him? I think you should seriously ... [snip!] ... at this point. Either way, the lawyer will tell you what chances you have in court, what the laws are in your state, etc etc."</blockquote>




I think your right, i do need to talk to a lawyer before i do anything.

greenmamabecky☮ TTC since Jul 2013; 18 kids; Enfield, Connecticut 20984 posts
3rd Dec '12
Quoting D.M:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Will☮Creedence:</b>" Does he do drugs? Have a record? ... [snip!] ... are in your state, etc etc."</blockquote> I think your right, i do need to talk to a lawyer before i do anything."


Good luck!

baybe girl 3 kids; Mobile, Alabama 95 posts
3rd Dec '12

Yeah its always best to talk to a lawyer first .. find one that does a free consult.. but from personal experience if you end up going through with anything, get references and most times its worth the money to get a good one.. mine is horrible
If he is on the birth certificate then legally you cant keep him from the child unless there's a court order saying hes unfit.. that's what my lawyer told me..

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
3rd Dec '12

Wow.states is fucked up. My dds dad has no rights he gave them up I didn't have anyone adopt lo she was 2 and 10 now and iam still single. Lol



Court took them away then ordered him to pay child.support.



Can't you do shared custody with your mom? We can here. Lol just ask a lawyer about it.

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
3rd Dec '12

I was looking into terminating BDs rights even though I have sole custody. I think what the lawyer told me might be helpful to you, but keep in mind I live in Canada.



Basically everyone has a right to take you to to court for custody. His rights could be terminated an he could still take you. Whether he would win is a different story. So basically you could give custody to your mom and he could take your mom to court and still get split custody - then you lose because you have nothing.



My opinion is do not let your mom take custody, thats a bigger mistake than fighting for custody in court. I know it's scary but if he wants nothing to do with your child and is a crappy father, you have a good chance of getting full anyways (providing you can prove it). Don't panick and make a poor decision!