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lolajessup Due July 25; 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Beaverton, Michigan 44057 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" Well, the weight was an issue for a LONNNNG time up until I started losing it with baby #2 and then ... [snip!] ... something, but obviously seeing the porn I know he's wanting something sexually, and obviously I'm not providing enough of it. "</blockquote>



I'm convinced now he really needs help. Bring up the pron and he might agree to go with you to counseling. You do not deserve to be treated that way hun :(

.:ANIMAL:. California 740 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" Have you looked around to any support groups for your illness to see if others have experienced the same with their partners?"


I asked last week when I went in for Chemo again...I had a few friends that were there, and we were all talking. They're all older and said they hadn't had that problem because they're both too busy or distracted to worry about sex, they really couldn't give me any advice, and the only other person my age there, isn't married.

W.W. 3 kids; Arkansas 7743 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" Well, the weight was an issue for a LONNNNG time up until I started losing it with baby #2 and then ... [snip!] ... something, but obviously seeing the porn I know he's wanting something sexually, and obviously I'm not providing enough of it. "</blockquote>
I felt like a burden as well and I felt like it was because of my weight. Its a terrible feeling and you don't deserve to feel that way. He needs to address his problem..

Just Ames 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Montego Bay, Jamaica 114793 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" Have you looked around to any support groups for your illness to see if others have experienced the same with their partners?"

:!:
I'm wondering if he's scared.

Phallus Cranium fuknutz, NM, Togo 103283 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting Just Ames:" :!: I'm wondering if he's scared."

thats what I was thinking, like emotionally disconnected due to fear

Just Ames 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Montego Bay, Jamaica 114793 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" thats what I was thinking, like emotionally disconnected due to fear"

Mmhmm

.:ANIMAL:. California 740 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" thats what I was thinking, like emotionally disconnected due to fear"


Fear of me being sick and dying? I mean at the very least he could bring those fears to me, I've told him that I am here no matter what, and I am...tears, anger, whatever...

_______Nope_________ 23772 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" thats what I was thinking, like emotionally disconnected due to fear"


Yeah, this. And probably not wanting to talk about it so he doesn't put those pressures and problems on her. Feeling selfish too for being upset, you know? Like, knowing she's having a hard time so feeling like crap for having problems as well.

Phallus Cranium fuknutz, NM, Togo 103283 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:" Fear of me being sick and dying? I mean at the very least he could bring those fears to me, I've told him that I am here no matter what, and I am...tears, anger, whatever..."


Yes, that was my line of thought.

If I were him and feeling that way, I would probably not want to put that on my partner that is sick, you know?

tonys_mama(army wife) 4 kids; 1 angel baby; Fort Irwin, California 15522 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" Fear of me being sick and dying? I mean at the very least he could bring those fears to me, I've told him that I am here no matter what, and I am...tears, anger, whatever..."</blockquote>




Make him sit sown and talk to you about it. I honestly have no idea how I would react if I found out my husband had cancer. He could just be feeling overwhelmed and stressed and is just pushing you away because he doesn't know how to express what he's feeling.

.:ANIMAL:. California 740 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting .Colleen.:" Yes, that was my line of thought. If I were him and feeling that way, I would probably not want to put that on my partner that is sick, you know?"


But there-in lies the problem, if he can't come to me for anything, and can't be affectionate. Then he's emotionally disconnecting himself from me completely and plugging in to something else, not only is that selfish, but that's also ignorant on his part if that is the case. I get he has stresses, and issues, and problems. But not being affectionate, and then on top of that not talking to me about these issues and problems doesn't solve anything and drives a wedge further between us.

lolajessup Due July 25; 2 kids; 1 angel baby; Beaverton, Michigan 44057 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" But there-in lies the problem, if he can't come to me for anything, and can't be affectionate. Then ... [snip!] ... on top of that not talking to me about these issues and problems doesn't solve anything and drives a wedge further between us."</blockquote>



You guys definitely need to talk this out and get some professional help. Please keep us updated how it goes when you Guys talk.

Miss. Tiff Due November 20; 33 kids; Odessa, Missouri 2874 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Crystal Marie S.:</b>" I don't normally have issues with porn. But, when it's affecting your relationship, it has to be addressed. ... [snip!] ... then he has a problem and needs to work on it. A lot of the dating sites are pop ups, though. I would still ask, to be sure."</blockquote>




I agree if it's affecting your relationship negatively it's a problem. If want to cry too.
Hang in there maybe try to talk to him.
good luck!

.:ANIMAL:. California 740 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting lolajessup:" <blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" But there-in lies the problem, if he can't ... [snip!] ... guys definitely need to talk this out and get some professional help. Please keep us updated how it goes when you Guys talk."


Well, we talked, and basically he was like "I won't do it if you don't like it, but I don't really care if you're upset about it or not, I have my right to do what I want, and watch what I want." then he threw it out there that at least he's not f**king someone else. like that makes me feel a WHOLE lot better...So now I'm sitting in a huge comforter crying on my couch....I feel un-loved and completely crap at this moment.

W.W. 3 kids; Arkansas 7743 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:ANIMAL:.:</b>" Well, we talked, and basically he was like "I won't do it if you don't like it, but I don't really care ... [snip!] ... lot better...So now I'm sitting in a huge comforter crying on my couch....I feel un-loved and completely crap at this moment."</blockquote>
Wow, wtf...I'm so sorry hun :( . I wonder how he would react if you stopped giving a shit about his feelings.