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Wierd...But how would you tell some one... Jessica Fili 1 child; Sanford, Maine 697 posts
6th Dec '12

Okay SO and I have an apartment in a two family home...we are in the upstairs apartment, and his aunt her boyfriend and his daughter live down stairs...The daughter just turned 16 and from time to time helps me out with baby sitting and I pay her and she is amazing with my son cause she has lots of little siblings and stuff...Well a few week back she had a "friend" over while baby sitting ( and did ask me but didn't tell me it was a boy) My SO was going to be home while the friend was there but most likely getting ready for work...well needless to say when i came home HE was still there with her and my SOs aunty and she was telling them that this could not happen again and when she is baby sitting she needs to baby sit and not have friends boy or girl over...so everyone is on the same page NO FRIENDS WITH OUT AND ADULT PRESENT...
Well she was at her moms and needed a ride home so i picked her up and she came up stairs to visit and hang so i took advantage of the help and got some dishes done while they played...there was a knock at the door and it was her friend...so of course i let him and and they hung out for a few mins and then said they had to leave..they were supose to be meeting a few friends at the park (which they do every day after school we live in a small town nothing better to do), so my SO comes home as they are leaving and lets the dogs out and stuff , they leave...Well they didn't shut my door all the way, and didn't shut HER door all the way either...so when my SO came in with the pups my pitbull ran out the front door and down stairs into the APT down stairs...My SO ran after him and was stopped dead in his tracks to see his cousin (just barely 16 ) and this guy having sex!!!!
Well...now after talking to me SO has decided its to weird to tell his aunt...but that someone has to and he has asked me to do it...I have no problems telling her but not really sure the best way...I'm not just telling her that the 16 year old is having sex, but completely dis obeying her rule of no friends over without an adult home or present...How would you break the news?

May♥ 1 child; Texas 9183 posts
6th Dec '12

Lol oh shit. Awkward.

Boobo&bugs 2 kids; Simpsonville, South Carolina 7727 posts
6th Dec '12

Oh dang I don't know if I could. I wouldn't tell her they were having sex. I'd talk to the niece about birth control and offer to help her get some if she needed me to though.

*J* 50 kids; 14412 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jessica Fili:</b>" Okay SO and I have an apartment in a two family home...we are in the upstairs apartment, and his aunt ... [snip!] ... sex, but completely dis obeying her rule of no friends over without an adult home or present...How would you break the news?"</blockquote>



Id be blunt.



Hey i need to let you know what happened today/yesterday/whenever. She needs to know. Now.

Nichole+3girls 3 kids; Dayton, Ohio 31307 posts
6th Dec '12

i would flat our say SO walked in on cousing and dude having sex in her room"




No reason to beat around the bush.. pretty sure the aunt will figure out shes disobeying her when she hears theyre humping in her house.

gonnneeeeee 1 child; Texas 1082 posts
6th Dec '12

I would say something if it were me and she got pregnant or something bad happened i would feel somewhat responsible.

Jessica Fili 1 child; Sanford, Maine 697 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting kate & tilly:" Oh dang I don't know if I could. I wouldn't tell her they were having sex. I'd talk to the niece about birth control and offer to help her get some if she needed me to though."


I wanted to do this...but seriously think that the birth control talk should come from a parent or loved one, we aren't related and stuff and i dont know if i would be a little outta line or not...I want to give SOs aunt a heads up at least that the guy was in the house, they don't trust people and worry constantly...but i kinda don't wanna mention what they were doing...

Jessica Fili 1 child; Sanford, Maine 697 posts
6th Dec '12
Quoting elainasmylove♥:" I would say something if it were me and she got pregnant or something bad happened i would feel somewhat responsible. "


Thats why i wanna know how someone would want the news broken to them..I mean personally for the reason alone of what you said I know i have to tell her something...but its just hard, I'm not that close with these people but i am in a way..plus if it was me i dont know how i'd wanna find that info out...i almost felt like txting her but then thought this was a little more personal...

user banned 3 kids; Washington 15083 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting *J*:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Jessica Fili:</b>" Okay SO and I have an apartment in a two ... [snip!] ... Id be blunt. Hey i need to let you know what happened today/yesterday/whenever. She needs to know. Now."</blockquote>




!

Boobo&bugs 2 kids; Simpsonville, South Carolina 7727 posts
6th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jessica Fili:</b>" I wanted to do this...but seriously think that the birth control talk should come from a parent or loved ... [snip!] ... guy was in the house, they don't trust people and worry constantly...but i kinda don't wanna mention what they were doing..."</blockquote>




I'd just tell her to be more careful and not do it in her mothers house and give her planned parenthoods number and some condoms. But explain that planned parenthood can give her birth control and offer to drive her if she needed me to. I'd just tell the aunt hey the guy friend was over yesterday they went to your house. Maybe she'll tell her mom. If she doesn't though I'd be worried I caused a huge family fight. But she's 16 she probably knows about stds and pregnancy I'd just be worried about her access to birth control.

{tamz} Due September 2; 1 child; Maryland 2534 posts
6th Dec '12

Does she know your SO saw them?



Is it out of the question to give her one chance to the Aunt? At least so she's not getting blindsided. I only say this because I'm assuming you still want a good relationship with her.

I'm His Amy He's My Rory 2 kids; Caldwell, Idaho 49343 posts
7th Dec '12

I agree, be blunt. Just be like "Sooo, the dog ran in and SO saw ____ in bed with a guy, and they most definitely were busy doing the deed."

Jessica Fili 1 child; Sanford, Maine 697 posts
7th Dec '12
Quoting {tamz}:" Does she know your SO saw them? Is it out of the question to give her one chance to the Aunt? At least ... [snip!] ... At least so she's not getting blindsided. I only say this because I'm assuming you still want a good relationship with her."


yes she knows he saw her she sent him a txt saying "sorry about that" and he wrote back "too wierded out dont txt me right now" i told him that wasn't the best way to handle that but ive never walked in on my kinda cousin having sex before... I def like the idea of talking to her and giving her a chance to say something first...thank you, i'm nervous about that too but at least it will prepare her...

Wildflower 🌈 1 child; Oregon 7067 posts
7th Dec '12

Honestly, I wouldn't tell her mom...
I would just talk to her myself and ask her if she already has birth control and tell her to be careful and to not let it happen again.



If you tell her mom, it's just gonna embarrass her and then she will just be mad at you.
Plus I guarantee she's not gonna stop having sex anyways.
And her mom will find out eventually.

{tamz} Due September 2; 1 child; Maryland 2534 posts
7th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Jessica Fili:</b>" yes she knows he saw her she sent him a txt saying "sorry about that" and he wrote back "too wierded ... [snip!] ... her and giving her a chance to say something first...thank you, i'm nervous about that too but at least it will prepare her..."</blockquote>




I can't imagine how weird it will be and how weird it was for him. but I definitely think it shows her that while you are the adult and will tell on her if you must, that you care about her feelings and should hopefully maintain a good relationship.
Good luck!