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khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting HopingforaMiracle:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" I don't think she will have the option of not going. ... [snip!] ... Can I ask a question that is totally just something I'm curious about? Is she going with you on your one year trip overseas?"</blockquote>



No. She is staying with my parents because ex is deploying and I will be spending a lot of my schooling in the field in war torn provinces and Pakistan. That's not a safe place for children.

☆stumbleine ☆ 4 kids; d***o, 12138 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Tarynosaurus Rex:</b>" You seriously don't let your child speak ... [snip!] ... At dinner parties and weddings? She waits until someone acknowledges her. That's why we keep getting invited back."


Wow, my kids are the life of the party everywhere, and what do you know.... the masses love them. My kids range from 2 to 12, twins about to turn 13. I've never had to use soap or my hand to control them. I use to go to houses when I was little, some had that don't speak unless spoken to rule. It's absolutely degrading to a child, children are not below. They learn by speaking, and adult conversations have a big impact.

Mama Rice 34 kids; North Las Vegas, Nevada 11980 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" My daughter thinks the worst thing in the world is being sent to her room. She screams and cries and ... [snip!] ... will ask for a spanking instead because it is swift corporal punishment rather than a long, drawn out sentencing arrangement. "</blockquote>



OMG we just started making my DD write as a punishment. The way she sniffles and cries while she is doing it, the whining every 5 second (my favorite is "ow, ow, ow my hand. I think it is broken, I need to stop writing now")....you would think we beat her. I can't lie though, it is pretty funny how creative her excuses to stop writing get.

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting ☆stumbleine ☆:</b>" Wow, my kids are the life of the party everywhere, and what do you know.... the masses love them. My ... [snip!] ... absolutely degrading to a child, children are not below. They learn by speaking, and adult conversations have a big impact."</blockquote>



Like I said, homes are different than formal dinners. Would you let them run around and talk as much as they wanted at a military function or gala? And, dd has plenty of adult conversations. She is just supposed to have them when it is appropriate. The middle of a ceremony is not.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☆stumbleine ☆:</b>" Wow, my kids are the life ... [snip!] ... has plenty of adult conversations. She is just supposed to have them when it is appropriate. The middle of a ceremony is not."

I just wouldn't take a preschooler to a function like that. I could for sure get my kids to do what I needed them to do but I highly doubt at their age they would enjoy it & them not being there wouldn't IMO be "missing out" on anything. So I also think it differs for different families. it is in no way a priority to me to take my kids to those types of events. Especially now that I am a SAHM, I am thrilled for the chance to get out to adult based things without them. I'v enot taken them becuae I didn't think they could handle it - but I also don't try to take my kids places I don't think they will enjoy & I think we will enjoy it more without them there. I take them to church at times for family things (and my family is Catholic) and they set fine through an hour of service, but I do that because it is truly a family occasion...otherwise I wouldn't even do that to them. I know they are bored as all get out even if they do behave the way they are "supposed to". They have their whole lives for being bored in dull events...I don't try to throw more in there than I have to this early. If your child likes those things, then taking her is good. I also think it is different with many girls as they do tend to be able to set still earlier (not all, but most) and having one is different than 2 - because they feed off each other for sure. I watch a few girls & a few boys & I have 2 boys. I can tell you that 4 yr old girls function very differently than 4 yr old boys. Again not all of course, but most. And what they enjoy generally is very different.

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I just wouldn't take a preschooler to a function like that. I could for sure get my kids to do what I ... [snip!] ... very differently than 4 yr old boys. Again not all of course, but most. And what they enjoy generally is very different."</blockquote>




She loves military balls. The dancing and fancy dresses are her thing right now. She loves hanging with FIL and being his date at events which are all military. She and DH go to a local restaurant that is expensive as a treat for being miss manners. I can see it not working for other children.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I just wouldn't take a preschooler to ... [snip!] ... DH go to a local restaurant that is expensive as a treat for being miss manners. I can see it not working for other children."

Right, I think I would have loved it too. However my 5 yr old loves to get dressed up & look fancy (he always declares himself the handsomest boy ever & talks about how much the girls are going to LOVE what he is wearing) for all of 10 mins & then he asks how long he has to choke on his tie this time. LOL

khigh 1 child; Fort Sill, Oklahoma 8101 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:</b>" I think Novali would probably love that too... but, I still couldn't take her. Just like I'd love ... [snip!] ... kids to formal events, I'm just saying that in my family, it just isn't something we would do. Everyone parents differently.)"</blockquote>




When FIL was stationed here as the post command sergeant major, the whole family was expected to attend military functions. If he wasn't, we probably wouldn't have started taking her. Now that she has been to a few, she looks forward to going.

mamaluvsher4babies 36 kids; California 4230 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" Oh yeah, that's different, we don't have those things here! haha I'm just saying that it's not something ... [snip!] ... have enjoyed herself more if she were at the sitter's. She is well behaved in public.... at home, she is a little terror!! "

Arent they all LOL

Back to Noob Status Ohio 14048 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting Regina George:" What do you think? Is it a form of abuse to wash a child's mouth out with soap for talking back or using ... [snip!] ... curse words? Do you think it should be reportable to CPS? Do you think it would effective in cleaning up a child's vocabulary?"


I don't think it is abuse. It's very old school, and definitely not CPS worthy. :?

......... nowhere, NW, United States 25972 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☆stumbleine ☆:</b>" Wow, my kids are the life ... [snip!] ... has plenty of adult conversations. She is just supposed to have them when it is appropriate. The middle of a ceremony is not."</blockquote>




If they're not being rude? I sure would.

......... nowhere, NW, United States 25972 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I just wouldn't take a preschooler to a function like that. I could for sure get my kids to do what I ... [snip!] ... very differently than 4 yr old boys. Again not all of course, but most. And what they enjoy generally is very different."</blockquote>




I agree. When I have 1 child with me, they're perfect. But when there's two? All he'll breaks lose sometimes. And there's a definite difference in boys vs. girls.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 23057 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting HopingforaMiracle:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting khigh:</b>" ... [snip!] ... I will be spending a lot of my schooling in the field in war torn provinces and Pakistan. That's not a safe place for children."</blockquote>




Ok

Ryloonjimama Australia 18851 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting justanothamotha:</b>" I just wouldn't take a preschooler to a function like that. I could for sure get my kids to do what I ... [snip!] ... very differently than 4 yr old boys. Again not all of course, but most. And what they enjoy generally is very different."</blockquote>




I have to agree with this. 2 definitely feed off each other & boys for the most part are way rowdier than the girls.



I'm hoping for a girl this time to balance out this family, obviously if love my child no matter what but part of me dreads the fact that I could have 3 boys. lol.



Oh and definitely being a SAHM, you crave those adult event for your time!

. , Richmond, VA, United States 75063 posts
status 14th Dec '12
Quoting Not tellin:" What better place to let the frustration out? I am soooooo sorry you lost her. That T18 is nothing nice. ... [snip!] ... I am glad you both got a chance to hold her for a few hours. I am sure she knew how much she is loved. Thinking about you!!!!"

No joke. Sorry I'm late replying to this, I'm so sorry to hear that. :(