Cast Your Vote:

    • I've done both & SAHM is harder -- Votes: 26
    • I've done both & working is harder -- Votes: 27
    • I've done neither but I think SAHM is harder -- Votes: 1
    • I've done neither but I think working is harder -- Votes: 1
    • I'm a SAHM & I I think that is harder -- Votes: 2
    • I'm a SAHM & I I think working would be harder -- Votes: 5
    • I've always worked & I I think that is harder -- Votes: 5
    • I've always worked & I I think SAHM would be harder -- Votes: 1
Ryloonjimama Australia 18873 posts
Dec 12th '12

I have done both.

As much as I love my kids, being a SAHM has taken it's toll on my emotional wellbeing and that's been the hardest thing for me. Probably because I took on the role in a literal sense, being that we are home, like 90% of the time.

When I was working, it was hard but I was more stimulated by the world and adult conversation so I felt more sane. I also only worked when I had one baby.

I was going to go back to work because my oldest is starting big school next year & I decided to put my youngest in preschool (something my oldest didn't have)... Then I found out I was pregnant with #3, so I want to have that time at home with my new baby but I definitely need to put myself out there more, maybe join a mums group & I plan to pick up and further my studies because if I kept on keeping on the way I am, is probably go crazy.

Honestly I think it depends on so many factors, i.e: your ability to cope, how many children you have, their ages etc.

I think it'd be harder for a SAHM with like 2-3 kids, than it would with a working mum of 1 kid.... But if the working mum had 2-3 kids and the SAHM had only 1, it'd be harder for the working mum.

snglemama 4 kids; Georgia 11978 posts
Dec 12th '12

It's a given... working outside the home is more work. As a working mom.. I do everything I did as a sahm... plus work 40 hours per week outside the home.

however... being a sahm was not for me. It was more emotionally taxing than working outside the home. I get validation for what I do at work, I get a paycheck, reviews, adult interraction, friendships etc... when I was a sahm.. there were benefits... but I got depressed feeling like I had no friends, no structure, no immediate purpose, deadlines etc.

justanothamotha Due January 20; 130 kids; Climax, Michigan 5120 posts
Dec 12th '12
Quoting **Blessed Insanity **:" NEITHER, I repeat NEITHER is harder than the other, as soon as ppl realize this we can stop competing ... [snip!] ... has it hardest, FYI, if your a mom, a good one who cares and loves her children, WE ALL DO! ...end of story, end of arguement."

I think people have been very respectful & taking this in that light overall - I haven't seen what to me appears to be competing, just a discussion of what is easier/harder on lots of given situations with lots of personality types.

Leisurely Duchess 1 child; Monterey, California 25884 posts
Dec 12th '12

I think the average working mom has it physically harder just because the average woman with children is still doing the majority of domestic and parenting duties if she is living with a man, even if he is the father. So it's not like the average working mom can come home from a day of work and not have more work piled up for her at home. Single working moms, get the f**k out, that's probably the most difficult of all.

Housewives etc often have a different issue, and that is not getting enough interaction with peers or feeling like they don't have a life outside the bounds of the house. This can be difficult on the psyche. It's too easy and common for housewives to become isolated.

Leisurely Duchess 1 child; Monterey, California 25884 posts
Dec 12th '12

Obviously number of kids and parenting styles play significant roles.