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Who's allowed in the delivery room? SunshineDay Due May 3; Illinois 2 posts
11th Dec '12

My mother-in-law "announced" that she was going to be in the delivery room with me because she was there for the birth of her first grandchild (mine is her third). Needless to say, I was a little upset because that's a special, delicate time and she didn't even ask me. I've already decided who I wanted to be there with me, and I refuse to let her be one of them. Don't get me wrong, I love her and we get along great, but she can be demanding and overbearing - something I don't need at that time. How do I tell her that I don't want her there without causing tension?

Amy {OneGirl, TwoBoys} 3 kids; Cincinnati, Oh, United States 24247 posts
11th Dec '12

just tell her that you only want your SO in there with you. if she doesnt listen, tell a nurse and they wont let her in, lol

Chellie Due September 19; 2 kids; Vegas, Nv, United States 4204 posts
11th Dec '12

Tell her you can only have a limited number of people and you have already decided who is going to be there. That is how it was with both my deliveries. I could have two people aside from DH. I had my parents but my dad stepped out seeing as I am his daughter and he doesn't like blood let alone seeing a kid come out of me :D



Say she is welcome to wait in the waiting room and she can come see the baby after it is born:)

♥Love♥ TTC since Jun 2013; 2 angel babies; California 5134 posts
11th Dec '12
Quoting Amy {OneGirl, TwoBoys}:" just tell her that you only want your SO in there with you. if she doesnt listen, tell a nurse and they wont let her in, lol"

:!:
or tell her she isnt allowed in there. Let her assume you mean the hospital wont allow her :lol:

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 21595 posts
11th Dec '12

Some hospitals only let one to two people in the delivery room. It should be up to you who is in there

Kimber-lily Due September 27; 4 kids; Nova Scotia 28962 posts
11th Dec '12

Lol, you getting along great is going to end as soon as you stand up for yourself.
Just tell her no, and let your nurse know only your SO is allowed in the room.

UhmAmber 1 child; Texas 2415 posts
11th Dec '12

Ugh. My MIL is the same way. I just said, "I don't really want a ton of people in the room with me while I'm laboring..."



I'm a pretty shy person, so it worked out I think.

Jennybananna 2 kids; Gilbert, AZ, United States 25079 posts
11th Dec '12

If you are comfortable with it tell her she can be at the hospital but for delivery you would only like the following people there with you as thats what you're most comfortable with.

The Bear and The Bird 2 kids; Vantaa, Finland 42577 posts
11th Dec '12

Ew I'd say no if she just announced it like that.



I'm going to have my mom, the baby's dad, and his mom in the room. Because that's what /I/ want. If his mom just TOLD me she'd be there I'd shut that shit down.

S♡J=Malachi Due January 8; 3 angel babies; Florida 3278 posts
11th Dec '12

Just tell her you only want your mom & SO in the room.

UhmAmber 1 child; Texas 2415 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Viv, Ev & Gwen ♥:</b>" Ew I'd say no if she just announced it like that. I'm going to have my mom, the baby's dad, and his ... [snip!] ... dad, and his mom in the room. Because that's what /I/ want. If his mom just TOLD me she'd be there I'd shut that shit down."</blockquote>




:!: this. I hate when people think they can just SAY what part they're having in something that is MINE, which usually makes me more willing to tell them "uhhh... No." :D

J+K= Bri&Colton:) 2 kids; Windsor, PA, United States 8479 posts
11th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting True Diva:</b>" Just tell her you only want your mom & SO in the room."</blockquote>




:!: it's your choice she can't demand shit! If she's pushy tell the nurses and they will not let her in.

SunshineDay Due May 3; Illinois 2 posts
15th Dec '12

Thanks for all the advice! She caught me so off guard when she said it, I didn't know what to say, but I'm going to make sure there are no unwanted/uninvited guests during the delivery. It's gonna be bad enough having a medical staff looking up where the sun don't shine, I don't need family doing the same thing...lol

Elysia Skye 1 child; Adelaide, Australia 160 posts
15th Dec '12

My mil wanted to be in the room, but I just told her im only allowed 2 people in the room & it was going to be my mum & my her son. I wouldn't of gotten through my labour without my mum, she stayed til I got stitched up & I was stable then she left so we could bond as a family. then I had visitors a few hours later.
I didn't invite her & I let the hospital and my midwives know who was allowed in the room. Lol
It's your birth & your choice do what's best for you (-: