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What would you do? Maria + Cory = Alexis 17 kids; Middleport, Ohio 1075 posts
16th Dec '12

Me and Cory have been together for 2 1/2 years. When I was about 3 months pregnant we broke up. He had lost his job (AGAIN) and we were just having some major issues. He went back to his dad's house because I owned our place before we had even gotten together. I tried to be on friendly terms with him, give him updates on the baby and get him involved. Then out of the blue he makes a statement that he doesn't believe our baby is his. This comment went straight through me. He is the only man I have ever been with and there was never a question of infidelity in our relationship. I believe this comment was made to hurt me. He was very hurt at the time, he was not the one to end the relationship I was. And he had already lost his first two children to his ex-wife during their divorce.



Finally we started working things out. I would call his dad's house to give him updates and his father said that the baby wasn't Cory's and would not give Cory the messages I left in regards to health concerns with me and the baby. Finally Cory and I got to the point where we work everything out. He moved back in and got a job. He really step up his game. He is a good parent to Lexi, he reads to her every night and does all the household chords to keep me off my feet. He gives me nightly foot rubs and is always concerned about Lexi.



But even though we have worked things out I can't forgive his father for his words against my daughter. She isn't even here yet, due next month. And he denied her without any proof or reason. I know if Cory's mother was still alive she would have ripped him a new one for denying their grandchild. But after she died last year his father rushed off to marry another lady who I believe is behind all of this. Anyway neither of them are allowed to see my daughter once she is here. Even Cory agrees to that.



But what do you guys think? Do you think I over reacted by refusing him access to his grandchild? He already has lost contact with his other two grandchildren, and Cory is his only child. Should I let him be part of her life? I really do hate Cory's step-mother as does Cory. His father announced that they were getting married a month after Cory's mother died and I just never agreed with that. Cory and his mother were extremely close and his father's new wife is Cory's best friend's mother. Or use to be friend. What are your thoughts?

Colt's mommy 1 child; Moore, Oklahoma 21465 posts
16th Dec '12

Sounds like Cory's dad was just trying to protect his son. I don't think you should keep the grandparents from their grandchild.

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14109 posts
16th Dec '12

I think you'd be causing unnecessary drama by denying them their grandchild. Let them see her and be civil. You don't have to take her over all the time. Just for holidays or whatever.

Maria + Cory = Alexis 17 kids; Middleport, Ohio 1075 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting Colt's mommy:" Sounds like Cory's dad was just trying to protect his son. I don't think you should keep the grandparents from their grandchild. "

I don't want them to deny her in front of her. I know it will effect her the rest of her life and I just want her to be happy and healthy.

ChubbyCheekers 2 kids; New York 3117 posts
16th Dec '12

Yeah. Whatever has happened between you and his father, I don't believe you should let that affect your daughter or use her against them.

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
16th Dec '12

You're overreacting. If his father said anything about the baby not being Cory's that is because Cory obviously expressed his concerns about it. I actually think you were out of line to call his dad and ask him to relay messages when you could have called Cory yourself and told him.

Maria + Cory = Alexis 17 kids; Middleport, Ohio 1075 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting Supafly★:" I think you'd be causing unnecessary drama by denying them their grandchild. Let them see her and be civil. You don't have to take her over all the time. Just for holidays or whatever. "

He did come here last week and I left so Cory could have time with his father and show him Lexi's nursery. But there are other concerns for keeping him away. His father is an alcoholic and I believe there to be drugs in there house. I do not drink and have never done drugs in my life. I don't want that around Lexi. I never grew up around that, my parents don't drink or do drugs. Neither does Cory.

Colt's mommy 1 child; Moore, Oklahoma 21465 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting Maria + Cory = Alexis Mar:" I don't want them to deny her in front of her. I know it will effect her the rest of her life and I just want her to be happy and healthy."


well...the first year you're not going to have to worry about her knowing anything is going on. If they still deny her after she's born, then tell them you're more than willing to get a paternity test (if they will pay for it of course). Then you can go from there. Don't make any dicisions right now, a lot of things can change once the baby's born.

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
16th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Maria + Cory = Alexis Mar:</b>" He did come here last week and I left so Cory could have time with his father and show him Lexi's nursery. ... [snip!] ... in my life. I don't want that around Lexi. I never grew up around that, my parents don't drink or do drugs. Neither does Cory."</blockquote>




There's always more to the story when people don't agree...



Accusing someone of having drugs without proof is ridiculous. You didn't like it when he accused you of things that aren't true.

Maria + Cory = Alexis 17 kids; Middleport, Ohio 1075 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting JiLLiAN.:" You're overreacting. If his father said anything about the baby not being Cory's that is because Cory ... [snip!] ... think you were out of line to call his dad and ask him to relay messages when you could have called Cory yourself and told him."

Cory lived there. Every time I called I asked for Cory and they would always say he wasn't there. So I left messages. I had no other way of contacting him.

ChubbyCheekers 2 kids; New York 3117 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting JiLLiAN.:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Maria + Cory = Alexis Mar:</b>" He did come here last week and ... [snip!] ... someone of having drugs without proof is ridiculous. You didn't like it when he accused you of things that aren't true."


Lol I was thinking the same thing. It seems like whenever people don't get the answer they want in regards to keeping their baby from someone, they throw in the "but there's drugs and alcohol" argument out of nowhere.

Andi+Andy=Marley+1 2 kids; Fredericksburg, Virginia 4564 posts
16th Dec '12

It's not like you have to leave your DD alone with him. He should be able to see his grandchild

Supafly★ 2 kids; Poland 14109 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting JiLLiAN.:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Maria + Cory = Alexis Mar:</b>" He did come here last week and ... [snip!] ... someone of having drugs without proof is ridiculous. You didn't like it when he accused you of things that aren't true."


Agreed. You don't have to let them keep her overnight OP but there is no reason you can't take the baby over there and have a day visit once in awhile for family's sake.

Maria + Cory = Alexis 17 kids; Middleport, Ohio 1075 posts
16th Dec '12
Quoting Lizplustwo:" Lol I was thinking the same thing. It seems like whenever people don't get the answer they want in regards ... [snip!] ... want in regards to keeping their baby from someone, they throw in the "but there's drugs and alcohol" argument out of nowhere. "

Well I don't know for sure about the drugs, it is just a guess, but the alcohol is there.

user banned 2 kids; New York 34017 posts
16th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lizplustwo:</b>" Lol I was thinking the same thing. It seems like whenever people don't get the answer they want in regards ... [snip!] ... want in regards to keeping their baby from someone, they throw in the "but there's drugs and alcohol" argument out of nowhere. "</blockquote>




EVERY. TIME. :)