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Terrible 3's? Need advice Lucy♥Benji 2 kids; California 25026 posts
17th Dec '12

My daughter turned 3 in October. She's extremely smart, very outgoing, funny, sweet....But she loves to push buttons and boundaries. I'm currently living with my parents and my two kids do not see their father. My daughter really doesn't listen to my mother. She'll blatantly try to make my mom mad and then laugh. She pretty much only listens to me.



At school she had been really good but recently she started misbehaving in church (it's a catholic school and they go to church once a week). At first it was like, well they're three and it's an hour of sitting but she did pretty good considering. Well now it's like shes doing it on purpose. They've had to take her out twice now because she won't listen. And then today one of the teachers took her to the bathroom and Lucy kept trying to touch her chest (WTF) and the teacher told her not to and put her arm up to cover her chest and she was trying to pull her arm down! I dont know whats going on with her. My mom (she works at the school in the office) ending up bringing her home early which means she also missed out on part of her school party.



I do discipline her at home and I know that at school she loses privileges if she's really bad. I don't quite know what to do and I could really use some advice. I was thinking of doing a sticker chart and involving the teachers in it (like giving them a sheet of stickers and they get to decide whether she gets a sticker for the day) and then having some kind of prize/treat if she gets stickers for like a whole week or something. I don't know.

Blythe. 1 child; Indiana 22109 posts
17th Dec '12

3 year olds can be pretty big a*****es. When you find the trick let me know. I would probably talk to her about the way you are supposed to behave while in public

Lucy♥Benji 2 kids; California 25026 posts
17th Dec '12
Quoting Blythe.:" 3 year olds can be pretty big a*****es. When you find the trick let me know. I would probably talk to her about the way you are supposed to behave while in public "


See and I don't know why she only listens to me. Maybe it's an attention thing? Yesterday I took her out alone to a very crowded mall and then the craft store. She was amazing. Held my hand the whole time and had a nice conversation with me. Never asked for anything, never ran off. She was freaking great.

Leslie Graham-Newton Due April 16 (girl); 2 kids; Rolla, Missouri 193 posts
17th Dec '12

My son just turned 4 and he never went through that stage. THANK GOD! But he was pushing buttons to see how much he could get away with we sat down had a talk about how he is being rude and disrespectful and it isnt right to be that way and ask them if they have a friend if how they would feel if there friend treated them that way my son quickly learned not to be rude or talk out of turn or even interrupt me or daddy when we are talking to adults he gets his mouth smacked not hard or anything but when he talks back and such like he has a fascination with saying what are you a tardo or something? just gotta break it down to them how would they feel if someone treated them how they are treating us and other adults.

Civchic 2 kids; Ontario 204 posts
17th Dec '12

My son also just turned 3 in October and went from super polite and well-behaved (and I will admit, making me pat myself on the back a little bit about how awesome of a parent I am) to an absolute little monster in about 2 days flat. Listening, agression, not eating his dinner, EVERYTHING. I started to watch the clock for bedtime.



He's coming back to his normal sweet self and all I can say is that I maintained the discipline, mostly didn't lose my cool, and rode it out. Tons of timeouts, lost privileges, a couple of changed rules, and it looks like we are past the worst for now. It ends. And makes me fear for his teen years!

Kristin Oldach Due February 18 (boy); 1 child; Monroe, Georgia 5 posts
17th Dec '12

I too have a 3 year old, he turned 3 in Oct as well and has been a major handful, its causing my husband and i to fight more than usual latly bc we both get on to him dif. My husband has no patients AT ALL so it doesnt help at all.. he snaps and will yell at our son and give him spankings alot... i myself try to talk calm to him and dont always spank him. I tried talking to my husband abt this lastnight and telling him that i think we need to try talking more calm to him and not spanking or yelling so much.. and all he does it take what i say the wrong way, like im saying hes a bad parent or abusive, which isnt at all what im trying to say. I just dont see the yellinfg back and hitting helping the situation at all. My son will cry and then my husband yells at him for crying and tells him he needs to stop... im a very emotional person so i know what its like to be told to stop crying when im upset, all it does is upset me more. I know my husband means well, but what can we do to make this situation better? my son has been hiting and yelling alot. they say he is good at school but at home or when we are with friends or family, hes not so good. Im also 31 weeks preg, my son will go from being sweet and kissing my belly to smacking it real hard or he will push real hard on it.. and he knows its bad... he looks at me with that look like hes just doing it to get the reaction out of me... i dont get it.... please help me as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Smokey_Taboo Due April 22; 1 child; California 5480 posts
17th Dec '12

ughhh right there with yah mama, my kid turned 3 in october too.. its been a whirled wind every since :shock:
We did sticker chart for sitting down during circle time at school we only had to do it for about 2 weeks. she has school twice a week if she got two stickers she got to go get a sweet treat the stickers with treat themed it worked for her now she is sitting better during circle time, but she is still a terror all the other times. :evil:

Smokey_Taboo Due April 22; 1 child; California 5480 posts
17th Dec '12
Quoting Kristin Oldach:" I too have a 3 year old, he turned 3 in Oct as well and has been a major handful, its causing my husband ... [snip!] ... look like hes just doing it to get the reaction out of me... i dont get it.... please help me as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


aww hun im so sorry, but know you are soo not alone.. I wish there was a magic fix it button but there isnt.. Me and my BD have been fighting alot too about money and because my daughter has been acting out and in return its only making her act out more and she yells at us more. but in the last week we have taken a step back talked more with compassion and well I hope its setting a better explain for her... I dont know only time will tell... I bet with the new baby on the way and being 3 and testing boundaries its alot of change for him, you will get threw it <3

Lucy♥Benji 2 kids; California 25026 posts
17th Dec '12
Quoting Kristin Oldach:" I too have a 3 year old, he turned 3 in Oct as well and has been a major handful, its causing my husband ... [snip!] ... look like hes just doing it to get the reaction out of me... i dont get it.... please help me as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


This is the one thing I have to remind myself when I miss their dad. My kids are probably much better off without him right now. He has a very short temper, no patience, etc. He spanked our daughter (over nothing really) right before we split and left a welt on her bottom. I couldn't imagine having him around right now and I'm actually a little happy he chooses not to be.