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a weird family arrangement? deannawi 2 kids; Lewisville, North Carolina 46 posts
20th Dec '12

One of my co workers has two daughters by two different dads. She's still with the youngest's dad. They have lived together for years and he treats the oldest daughter like his own. Thats not weird at all. Here is the weird part.
The father of the oldest babysits both girls really often....at their house even....and the youngest daughter calls him daddy, just like the oldest calls her stepfather daddy. I mean......both dads treat both girls like their own.
I'm not saying this is BAD....i think its great because it seems to work for them. The girls get two dads i guess....and my coworker friend and her bf get a babysitter whenever they want. everyone wins

But isnt it a little weird? Or....rare maybe is a better word to use. I've seen my friend and her ex interact a number of times...i don't detect any sort of body lanugauge that would imply they are more than just 'ex's' .....i could be wrong., not that its any of my business anyways, in that respect.

Also another ahem...rare thing. is that for the holidays, the ex is usually invited over...like this past thanksgiving, and apparently for this christmas and so on. Another good example is this past fourth of july, i ran into them at the park where they were having fireworks....mother, father, two girls and the first babydaddy

i just don't hear much about mothers getting along so well and being so buddy buddy with their ex's....and even less often about the current babydaddy and the old babydaddy being so buddy buddy.

Just wondering about others thoughts on it.

Blythe. 1 child; Indiana 22567 posts
20th Dec '12

I think all that sounds great. They call all be a family together, most kids don't get that.

user banned 1 child; Germany 12377 posts
20th Dec '12

I always wanted that if BD and I split, but I ended up having to get a restraining order on him lol. Kudos to them! It is weird/rare, I don't know a good word either lol but I'm jealous baha

tooodles 240 kids; Thailand 5075 posts
20th Dec '12

Eh like you said its just rare to see exs coparent that closely nowadays. However I think it is strange as hell that they both call both guys dad. To me that's weird.

Momma +2 Girls 2 kids; Indiana 3612 posts
20th Dec '12

That IS rare but i dont think its weird at all. Its nice that they can all be adults about it and get along well for the children.

Ella Minnow Pea Delight, Arkansas 3914 posts
20th Dec '12

It is unusual, that's for sure. Although if I'd ever had a kid with my one ex, I think we would be able to be that way. I was really good friends with him before we dated, and then we've stayed friends afterwards. I really care about him as a friend, but I know we could never make a relationship work together--so there's no threat to my DH or ex' gf that there'd be any cheating involved or anything. It wouldn't work so well with my other exes though, because those didn't end so friendly. haha

It's so Fluffayy! Due March 17 (girl); 19 kids; Texas 4279 posts
20th Dec '12

I call two guys dad, shit I called 3 dad at a time. My bio and the man who raised me. I stopped of course calling my mom's ex husband dad when he left her.



I think that's awesome. I sure would have loved for everyone to be civil then to constantly fight and use me so no I don't find it weird. I find it amazing.

DeanJade&Mak's Mom 3 kids; Covina, CA, United States 8822 posts
20th Dec '12

My ex and husbnd are cool now...



Like for Maks bday this sept. It was Davids turn to have Dean, but we decided last min to have a party at chuckie cheese fo Maks, David bought Dean and a gift for Maks, so Dean wouldn't miss his 1st bday party...



For back to school night, me my husband, david, and dean went...



When we had to sign up to do hours at the festival for deans school, my ex and husband signed up to do the beer booth at same time :roll:



When ex picks up dean from school on fridays, he brings him home to change clothes, leave bag and get his meds, me and his dad will go thru his school work, he kinda plays around with Maks and we chit chat...till his highness is ready...

deannawi 2 kids; Lewisville, North Carolina 46 posts
20th Dec '12
Quoting :*:CHRiSTiNe:*::" Eh like you said its just rare to see exs coparent that closely nowadays. However I think it is strange as hell that they both call both guys dad. To me that's weird."


Yah...that kind of struck me as odd too, but now that i know the family better, i can understand it. The ex babysits them like two or three times a week, every week, because of the parents work schedules so i think him and his ex's youngest daughter have a close bond. Lol my friend told me that she actualy doesn't call him daddy when her actual dad is around though, just when her bio dad is at work. Not true of the oldest daughter though. I've heard her call both of them dad.

deannawi 2 kids; Lewisville, North Carolina 46 posts
20th Dec '12
Quoting DeanJade&Maksims Momma:" My ex and husbnd are cool now... Like for Maks bday this sept. It was Davids turn to have Dean, but ... [snip!] ... me and his dad will go thru his school work, he kinda plays around with Maks and we chit chat...till his highness is ready..."


Wow....well yah it sounds like you guys have a similar type of deal. So you said they are cool now....so they weren't originally? what made them finally get along?

DeanJade&Mak's Mom 3 kids; Covina, CA, United States 8822 posts
20th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting deannawi:</b>" Wow....well yah it sounds like you guys have a similar type of deal. So you said they are cool now....so they weren't originally? what made them finally get along?"</blockquote>




They never didn't get along, but when david (bd) got out of prison he was a pain, for 1 year, till he took me to court for custody, so Jessie my husband *still dating at time b4 our 1st baby*
Went thru everything with me, lawyer fees, court dates, just a lot of ugly drama...
Me and david had to have police mediate drop offs/pick ups because me and him would fist fight if we didn't think we'd catch a case,



This past year and half I noticed david grew up, he kinda got over
whatever he had against me... I kinda forgave him for what he did in court...
We all finally realized even if we didn't love each other, we all loved Dean... Plus Dean got diagnosed with adhd and odd, he got kicked ou
t of a private school, they called cps on us so we kinda stuck together
like, if any funny shit starts to happen, were outta here... Lol



My ex even helped my husband get med cards cuz they both weren't passing drug tests :roll:

babydelicious 2 kids; Connecticut 168 posts
20th Dec '12

i wouldnt let my ex near any of my kids.. hes a drug addict and low life who uses people.

£iones§ 1 child; Saint Albans, WV, United States 145 posts
20th Dec '12

Hah This is my aunts life. My aunt left my uncle for his best friend J. My aunt and uncle had 2 daughters. Well Then to find out she was cheating with J. After my uncle found out It was a little dramatic, but things settled to the point that its exactly like this situation. My aunt got pregnant acouple months after leaving my uncle. Eventually my uncle and J were best friends again. My cousins call both of them daddy, and my uncle pretty much lives there. To me my aunts situation is great, but its strange and not a common situation that's for sure lol

deannawi 2 kids; Lewisville, North Carolina 46 posts
20th Dec '12
Quoting
Lulafortune 4 kids; Illinois 172 posts
20th Dec '12

I have a similar situation with my kids. I was with my two oldest kids' dad since we were 14 till our mid 20's. Our kids are now 18 and 20 (we even have a grandbaby) but he acts as an "uncle" figure to my two youngest boys. We still do birthdays and holidays together. If my boys need anything he is there for them. They are 12 and 3. I know it is unusual but this is our family and I wouldn't have it any other way.