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Yeah.. single mom problems. brittanyy [+M] 1 child; Henderson, TX, United States 4021 posts
20th Dec '12

So.. my daughter's dad has another kid. This kid is about 1.5yrs younger than ours. That kid's momma has kept him away from her and their kid for two years (stemming from a Domestic Violence charge against him back before their kid was born.)



She decided this past summer to pursue him for CS, and visitations.
She now gets $194 a month.
I get $50 a month.
I've asked him about increasing our support order, getting it modified and such, and his reaction was "GET A JOB. It's not that hard."
I requested a modification anyway.



Recently, the visitations started. The visitation schedule with his other kid is the exact same as ours.
Meaning, on the days when he's supposed to be visiting ours, he's also supposed to see this other kid. So, who does he pick?
Not ours.



I've been told for a couple of months that he's "working late", and couldn't make it to visit our kid (we live 30min apart)
I found out today that he's actually getting off work at a decent hour, but chooses to visit his other kid.
I asked his dad why he couldn't arrange a different day to visit with her, and he said, "Their visitation schedule says it HAS to be on Thursdays."
SO DOES OURS.



Like.. ugh. He hasn't seen our kid in like... 2 months (except for this weekend, when he, without letting me know at all, thrust both his kids together, and then bragged about it on Facebook)
My kid's grandpa (paternal) is the one who visits when he's supposed to.
Her grandpa is the one who picks up our daughter to go visit him.
Her grandpa even pays his child support, for our kid.



Like.. IDK what to do, about visitations. I don't even know if it's worth going to court over.
I've tried talking to him, and he just yells at me and tells me I'm being "a diva" and "too needy."
Like really?



(IDK if I actually made some sense. I'm quite irritated at him right now)



/end vent.

Dr. Angelface 2 kids; California 8236 posts
20th Dec '12

i don't understand . how fucked up with the court system that they don't realize he has two scheduled visitations on the SAME DAY??? can't u have it changed.



he sounds like a piece of shit. i say get your support raised and be happy his sorry ass isn't visiting.
you don't want a negative person around ur kid anyway right?

miss.Amandalyn ; 3 kids; Saskatchewan 1279 posts
20th Dec '12

Maybe he's trying to make up for lost time or parking the mommy

Cocaine 1 child; Texas 7740 posts
20th Dec '12

That's really shitty :( Have you considered asking him to sign his rights over?



Btw I had to do a doubletake at your location, I'm in Kilgore :D

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
status 20th Dec '12

A lot of the time courts will schedule visits for siblings on the same day so that they get to spend time together as well.



I've seen several cases where this has been the case.



Also, I would revisit the child support order...that seems quite low.

Grniz 2 kids; Illinois 45669 posts
20th Dec '12

meh. my sons father has his first child few days a week and every other weekend I think.



prbably pays for things for her
..



he's never met our son who is 15 months. and hasn't paid a dime.



he sounds like a shit

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 23029 posts
20th Dec '12

I say this as a single mom as well. Just accept the child support and don't worry about the visitations. It'll all come out eventually. And definitely file for an increase

MamaTiffy Due August 2 (girl); 2 kids; Sunnyvale, CA, United States 8740 posts
20th Dec '12

From what I understand the oldest child is supposed to get the most and subsequent children get less.

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
status 20th Dec '12
Quoting Alyssa's mommy [EBFT]:" From what I understand the oldest child is supposed to get the most and subsequent children get less."


It's usually whoever files first, gets the most.

HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 23029 posts
20th Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting speaktruth2powr:</b>" It's usually whoever files first, gets the most."</blockquote>




This is what I was under the impression it was. Because I know my aunt gets the same amount from their dad for each one

mom2andrew&carter 18 kids; Leesburg, Florida 2159 posts
21st Dec '12

i dont understand why she gets more child support than you in the first place and how could the court system make the vistations the same day. Is that his only day of? I would definitly be fighting the courts with both of them

brittanyy [+M] 1 child; Henderson, TX, United States 4021 posts
22nd Dec '12

Like.. I understand his wanting to catch up with his other kid... but don't leave my kid out because of it.



I think what makes me maddest is how he's not even trying to work out an alternate schedule with either of us. He just does what he wants, and to hell with anyone else.



He and his dad are supposed to be coming over Christmas morning. I'm gonna be super pissed if his dad shows up, but not him.



I've asked them if they even brought up in court the fact that he has another child support/visitation order, and they just shrug and say, "It'll get worked out."
Uhm, yeah. Because I'm gonna go back to court with it.



(Sorry I had to post and run.. I have no internet and I have to piggy back off someone else)

brittanyy [+M] 1 child; Henderson, TX, United States 4021 posts
22nd Dec '12

And I totally just realized... he stopped coming to see our daughter when his other kid's mama started her divorce process from her husband..



-sigh- :(

Good Queen Bess 2 kids; Ontario 46826 posts
status 22nd Dec '12
Quoting Kahleesi:" Like.. I understand his wanting to catch up with his other kid... but don't leave my kid out because ... [snip!] ... gonna go back to court with it. (Sorry I had to post and run.. I have no internet and I have to piggy back off someone else)"


So, do you not want your daughter to get to know their sibling?