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MIL Rant ChubbyCheekers 2 kids; New York 3117 posts
26th Dec '12

So, DD will be two weeks old tomorrow and we are EBF.



We are currently staying with my in-laws because DH lost his job shortly before DD was born and we can't afford rent while I am out on maternity leave...so we're here very temporarily until we can get back on our feet. I love my in-laws but currently MIL is driving me nuts. She's very helpful with the baby, which I appreciate but lately she keeps insisting that we wake her up during the night if the baby is up so that we can get some sleep, and she's bugging me to pump so that she can feed baby during the night and doesn't have to wake me up. DH and I have explained to her numerous times that we don't mind, that we have a newborn and we know what we signed up for. She usually gets up about 5:30 a.m. (she runs a daycare) and will relieve us then if the baby is awake, but I just can't bring myself to wake her during the night to get up with our baby.



Also, I've explained to her that I will pump for when I go back to work but that I don't want to give DD a bottle before I absolutely have to to avoid nipple confusion and whatnot. I also want to nurse as much as possible to keep my supply up, and I also love nursing because I get that closeness with baby. I've told her that if she insists on taking the baby during the night that's okay, but she doesn't need to feel bad about waking me up to feed her. Anyways, she just came in a little while ago and was bugging me to pump some milk so me and DH could go out for a while and spend some time together and DH finally snapped at her and told her to drop it. She got all upset and then a little while later FIL came in to have a talk with us about how she's just trying to help.



I feel bad because I know it's coming from a good place and I don't want to seem ungrateful, but it's really starting to get on mine and DH's nerves. Am I wrong?

Snow 1 child; Storybrooke, ME, United States 34011 posts
26th Dec '12

You are NOT wrong. Almost the same damn things happened to me last year. MIL insisted LB was weak and needed formula because my milk wasn't enough. :roll: In reality, she was just pissed because she couldn't help feed him since he was EBF. :?

ChubbyCheekers 2 kids; New York 3117 posts
26th Dec '12
Quoting Snotface♫[usmc]:" You are NOT wrong. Almost the same damn things happened to me last year. MIL insisted LB was weak and ... [snip!] ... because my milk wasn't enough. :roll: In reality, she was just pissed because she couldn't help feed him since he was EBF. :?"

Thank you! She is such a martyr sometimes...she keeps asking DH, "are you mad at me?" despite him telling her no, which is irritating him to no end. So she told FIL that he was mad at her for offering to help.



Also, DH isn't comfortable with her taking the baby at night because she takes pain meds (I'm not sure what exactly) and they make her a little loopy. I've seen her after she takes them, she looks stoned. But he won't say that to her...he just tells her our baby, our responsibility.

Andi+Andy=Marley+1 2 kids; Fredericksburg, Virginia 4564 posts
26th Dec '12

You are not wrong. Don't feel bad. Your MIL's heart is in a good place but she needs to realize that you are doing what needs to be done. I have a feeling my MIL will beg me to pump when she comes down to visit after our baby is here and I will have to be the bad guy ( again) and tell her no. Just stand your ground. Don't let her pressure you.