Reply
Need opinions and advice please! Kelly+Brandon=Blake 1 child; Maryland 1260 posts
27th Dec '12

Okay so last week, my mom and I got into a fight about her not giving my son his gas medicine. She didn't see that he needed it because he would get it all night so he was fine all during the day. (My mom was our full time babysitter) She's always paranoid about medicine, but he's MY son and I know what's best for him. Anyways, I wasn't being respected as a parent or an adult and I told her if she couldn't handle it then I could find someone else. Well she didn't answer me last Friday morning when I called twice so I assumed that she wasn't going to watch him so my SO's grandmother gladly took him so I could go to work. My mom never called back so I wasn't going to stress it (I'm used to her pulling things like this with me). Anyways, luckily a few people in SO's family were off the next week (this week), I didn't have to go back to work until yesterday so Wed, Thurs + Friday was all set up for babysitters. I asked my mom if she would mind helping us out until we found a permanent sitter and she pretty much said no. I said it's fine, I understand. Actually, I was hurt and irritated because this is affecting all of us but it's whatever, can't do anything about it. We're trying to see about daycare vouchers but they're closed until Jan 1st soo that sucks! I'm not freaking out yet though lol. Anyways, how would you feel? I'm trying to not let this get in the way of our relationship but honestly it seems like she started these stupid fights just to get out of it. I called her today and she was sitting at home....doesn't make any sense.


Another topic I want opinions on, (don't want to make multiple posts lol)

Christmas was very hectic for us this year, everything was pretty much last minute and we forgot to get SO's 14 yr old brother a present and I already told SO's mom that we didn't get to her nail place in time to get her a gift card, said we would get it after Christmas. Well, when I picked up LO from SO's aunt's last night after work, she pulled me aside to inform me that SO's mom was very, very upset with us that we didn't get anything for his brother. She's been going through some stuff with the family fighting and what else I'm not sure. But, I told his aunt that we didn't do it on purpose and I was kinda getting irritated because she told me that in order to fix it we needed to get his brother something and definitely do NOT forget their birthdays coming up in Jan and Feb. Said that if we wanted to skip the gift card for his mom and get her the remote start for her vehicle in a couple weeks then that would be great. SO's family is great, they're so generous and supportful with everyone including me. I'm just having a hard time understanding the fact that we NEED to buy a gifts when 1) we're rushing to figure out daycare for our 4 month old 2) SO's car just stopped working this morning and had to borrow his moms truck 3) I don't think Christmas should be about presents, he knows we love him. I'm stressed and I can't help to feel bad but now we have to spend money on things that aren't needed at this moment? We NEED to save because we don't know if we will qualify for the daycare vouchers and if not...we won't be able to afford food for ourselves. Ugh. Please tell me I'm not crazy. Idk what to do.... :cry:

Kimber-lily Due September 27 (girl); 4 kids; Nova Scotia 28962 posts
27th Dec '12

Your mom isn't obligated to babysit. I hope you find someone soon.

Kelly+Brandon=Blake 1 child; Maryland 1260 posts
27th Dec '12
Quoting Kimber-lily:" Your mom isn't obligated to babysit. I hope you find someone soon."


I didn't say she was obligated, but I was hurt that we left us hanging not caring if I lose my job over this. Thanks though.

Veronica m6 Due February 25 (boy); Fort Richardson, Alaska 1514 posts
27th Dec '12

Like the other female said, you mother is not obligated to babysit for you but I hope you find somebody.
Also you mother has a point about the gas meds... If you always use it, he will become dependent on it. Try to find more natural ways to relieve his gas.. certain foods and drinks can do that w/o using meds. Als,o if he does go to a daycare..they will not give meds unless a doctor says and you must have a note.
Good luck and best wishes.

WV Momma+2 girls :) Due February 8 (boy); 2 kids; Reigelwood, NC, United States 2190 posts
27th Dec '12

I would probably be pretty irritated if you got everyone else something and forgot my 14 year old son. And then said, oh well he knows we love him. You can get something cool for 10 or 15 dollars, especially since everything is on sale because its after Christmas. I would just get him something and avoid family drama.

Veronica m6 Due February 25 (boy); Fort Richardson, Alaska 1514 posts
27th Dec '12
Quoting WV momma:" I would probably be pretty irritated if you got everyone else something and forgot my 14 year old son. ... [snip!] ... especially since everything is on sale because its after Christmas. I would just get him something and avoid family drama."


Yeah most def.... Heck, even a card w/20 bucks in it wont hurt or a cool shirt from Burlington Coat Factory. :wink:

Mommie Dearest. Due September 17 (boy); 17 kids; Mississippi 1902 posts
27th Dec '12

If your mom is generous enough to watch your child, I would trust her. She did raise her own babies too. It may have benefited you to have someone working with him to start handling gas instead of depending on something to always take it away. If I were you , I'd apologize. Moms can be very controlling and intrusive at times, but you have to realize they love that baby as much as they love you and they don't ever want to see harm come to them. It's not disrespect in anyway , but you are their baby with a baby and they've helped us through everything else in our lives. You never know what they'll do in a daycare ... but you know your mom is dedicating 100% to that baby with love.

On the present , just buy something inexpensive and nice. It's your DH's brother? It probably means a lot to him to get something from his older brother. I would be upset too!