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Does this bother you? K[♥ E&C] 2 kids; Nevada 25704 posts
31st Dec '12

So a little background.. my son is 4.5yrs, he isn't an angel all the time. DH and I will always correct him or say something to him when he's doing something he shouldn't be. Well my SIL ALWAYS talks/nitpicks to him to WHILE we're already talking to him. It drives me insane. It makes him feel like he's being ganged up on and she really has no place doing it if we were not talking to him about it, I could totally understand. But she's always chiming in when it's being handled. DH (her brother) and I have talked to her before about letting us talk to our child

So Saturday night, I blew up at her. My exact words were "S.. STOP! My child. I got it!" But it was loud and accelrated because lots of people were talking in the background. Now the entire family that was there saturday at dinner thinks I'm wrong for yelling at her (and wont shut up about it). It justs irritating that #1 people can't heed the warnings they're given and #2 she shouldn't be doing it in the first place! GAHH!!

Would it bother you? Am I being too harsh on her? I really don't see it that it's too harsh, especially since I've asked her in the past to quit.

ma ♥ 1 child; California 63053 posts
31st Dec '12

I don't think it's wrong of you to be upset, I would be too. But I do think you should apologize for yelling at her. Explain to her that you're sorry for snapping, but you do want to handle your child on your own without any outside help.

K[♥ E&C] 2 kids; Nevada 25704 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting ma ♥:" I don't think it's wrong of you to be upset, I would be too. But I do think you should apologize for ... [snip!] ... her. Explain to her that you're sorry for snapping, but you do want to handle your child on your own without any outside help."


I did say sorry after dinner, that I didn't mean to snap. It just doesn't seem like anything sinks in though. And now the whole family is in on it.. driving me nuts.

Bri + One ♥ Due October 19; 1 child; Florida 4316 posts
31st Dec '12

I would be furious if anyone besides me or SO got onto my child. You are not wrong. But like Ma said. To settle things down, appologize, but stand your ground. Tell her that you meant what you said, just not the tone you said it in.

ma ♥ 1 child; California 63053 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting K[♥ E&C]:" I did say sorry after dinner, that I didn't mean to snap. It just doesn't seem like anything sinks in though. And now the whole family is in on it.. driving me nuts."


Ohh well then if you already apologized, I would just let it be. She & the rest of your family will eventually get over it. If they keep it up, tell them you already apologized & there's not much else you can do.

Tracy B 1 child; Doncaster, United Kingdom 640 posts
31st Dec '12

I have had the same situation crop up just lately, everytime I started tell my LO 'no don't do that' my MIL would then over talk me by shouting 'ETHAN NO". I let it go for around 3 weeks and I mentioned it on Friday when she visited and did it again. I explained that when I am telling my son off, please do not butt in. I am his mummy not you, you keep over riding me and I am not having it.



She was a bit miffed with me but I stood my ground. I am hoping that she takes note and does not do it again but so far she is a law to herself. I have told her and each time she does it I will keep picking her up.



Personally I think you have done the right thing, she might get the message now. It does depend on how loud you shouted but then again I bet you were just miffed that she had done it again.

user banned 3 kids; Ontario 10942 posts
31st Dec '12

Idk. I don't really see the big deal. But I'm not you. So its based on how you feel. I would apologize for snapping, and explain your frustration in the moment since you have have told her not to before.



All my family nag each others kids lol weither we are all in the room or not. But if its something you don't want, then she should listen

Tracy B 1 child; Doncaster, United Kingdom 640 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting K[♥ E&C]:" I did say sorry after dinner, that I didn't mean to snap. It just doesn't seem like anything sinks in though. And now the whole family is in on it.. driving me nuts."


That's all you can do, the family will get over it. Does she have children? If yes how would she feel if you kept having a go at hers.

K[♥ E&C] 2 kids; Nevada 25704 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Tracy B:" That's all you can do, the family will get over it. Does she have children? If yes how would she feel if you kept having a go at hers."


She does not. Her best friend was a single mom and she was in her daughters life pretty much everyday. Her friend let my SIL pretty much talk to her daughter however she liked. Unfortunately a lot of it has carried on with her because she thinks that's okay to talk to my kid like that, but it's not.



Like I said earlier I would totally understand her talking to him if no one was, but if DH and I are handling it, she needs to shut up.



Thanks for the imput ladies. I said I was sorry for snapping, I'll just leave it at that.