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desperate need of advice Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12

I don't even know where to begin, basically last year in 2011 the father of my daughter abandoned us when she was 5 months old, than came back around when she turned 8 months old, he told me he changed, said he swears he will never do that to us again, well on the 23rd i found out i was pregnant again, he seemed fine, we both said that we are scared ect ect, but he never let it bother him, on the 25th our daughter woke up super sick we took her to the ER and spent Christmas sleeping all day than he went to work (btw we dont live with him he lives at his dads i only go over on the weekends sometimes) anyways later that night we got into a fight, 2 days later made up..well on the 28th we got into a very ugly fight, he got sick with my daughter (as did i) so he has been doing nothing but sleeping and working and thats it, but always called me before and after work...well our fight started because i got "bitchy" and told him how i'm upset because i need help, asked him if he could please bring me meds and ect...and it turned into a horrible fight with us getting into past issues how we hate this and this about each other how all i do is sit around and all i do is bitch, ect than he said "i gotta go bye" and hangs up the phone (because he had to leave for work) he gets off at 11 every night..so i wait up for him to call...anyways he never calls...than the next day...never calls...than the next day never calls...so i get in touch with his dads wife..tell her i am pregnant i am having a lot of brown discharge and i need him to take me to the ER...so his dad goes and wakes him up...he wakes up for 15-20 minutes and gets the phone and brings in downstairs..(his dads wife told me all of this) but never called, i called about 5 times...than i asked his dads wife whats going on and she said he came upstairs and put the phone on the charger and left for work....he didn't even bother calling me...i have no idea what to do, and now they know i am pregnant and no one is happy about it because literally the last think him and i need is a second baby...i feel lost..sad...alone..i have no idea why he is doing this to me.,...and as soon as my mom and dad find out im pregnant again they will be taking me and my daughter to a shelter to live....i'm scared...i am just in shock in how he is treating me over a fight that we have had before....i dont get why he is sleeping all day either..he gets home at 11 at night than sleeps until 6:00...this makes no sense..any help? :(

White Chocolate Milk 1 child; Chelsea, Alabama 12303 posts
31st Dec '12

Maybe you should consider getting an abortion. Obviously you are not in the position to have another child and can't count on the father for support. Especially if being pregnant means you and your child will have to go to a shelter.



As far as the guy I would just leave him alone for now. If he comes around then good if he doesn't then you obviously know you are better off.

GL♣PC♥BC 3 kids; Atlanta, GA, United States 9408 posts
31st Dec '12

Why would you t not live together if you are having a baby together?
This does not sound like an ideal situation for one baby, let alone two :(

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting White Chocolate Milk:" Maybe you should consider getting an abortion. Obviously you are not in the position to have another ... [snip!] ... I would just leave him alone for now. If he comes around then good if he doesn't then you obviously know you are better off."


I just had an abortion back in July, i cant handle another one, on top of it my last one my parents paid for and wont do it again...i was considering looking into adoption.

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting GL♣PB:" Why would you t not live together if you are having a baby together? This does not sound like an ideal situation for one baby, let alone two :("


Idk, my parents wont let him live here and his dad i don't think will let us live there.

GL♣PC♥BC 3 kids; Atlanta, GA, United States 9408 posts
31st Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lumpy space princess:</b>" Idk, my parents wont let him live here and his dad i don't think will let us live there."</blockquote>




Do you two work? sorry, I meant why don't you move in together
I can't believe your parents would rather put you in a shelter than pay for an abortion though..

White Chocolate Milk 1 child; Chelsea, Alabama 12303 posts
31st Dec '12

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lumpy space princess:</b>" I just had an abortion back in July, i cant handle another one, on top of it my last one my parents paid for and wont do it again...i was considering looking into adoption."</blockquote>



Adoption would probably be the next best option for you then. Once you completely decide that is what you want to do I would tell your parents and let them know right away you are planning adoption. Start looking into adoption agencies and get as much info as you can. The sooner you start the better.

Derp Due January 10; 1 child; Camp Lejeune, NC, United States 11610 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Lumpy space princess:" I just had an abortion back in July, i cant handle another one, on top of it my last one my parents paid for and wont do it again...i was considering looking into adoption."

Well it sounds like you can't handle another child either. Have you thought about adoption? And maybe your parents are just trying to scare you... Surely they wouldn't throw you into a shelter.



Whatever you do, for the love of god, start using birth control after this child is born.



Good luck.

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting GL♣PB:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Lumpy space princess:</b>" Idk, my parents wont let him live ... [snip!] ... why don't you move in together I can't believe your parents would rather put you in a shelter than pay for an abortion though.."


I don't work, but he does, he works part time at a gas station and barely brings home $200 a week, so idk how'd that work, but yeah that was what happened when i got pregnant back in July my parents said if you get an abortion you can stay here if you choose to keep the baby we will drive you to a shelter...I honestly cannot handle another abortion.

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Raptor Jesus:" Well it sounds like you can't handle another child either. Have you thought about adoption? And maybe ... [snip!] ... you into a shelter. Whatever you do, for the love of god, start using birth control after this child is born. Good luck."


Lol, i agree with everything you just typed thank you, and honestly i don't think they are kidding, they have even called ones for me before to see if they can bring me in.

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting White Chocolate Milk:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Lumpy space princess:</b>" I just had an abortion back in July, ... [snip!] ... are planning adoption. Start looking into adoption agencies and get as much info as you can. The sooner you start the better."


Yes, I agree, the sooner the better, I just am going to have the hardest time letting go of my own flesh and blood but i'd also be doing my little heart a huge favor.

Derp Due January 10; 1 child; Camp Lejeune, NC, United States 11610 posts
31st Dec '12

Also, this guy sounds like an asshole. If he wants to be involved he'll get involved. You shouldn't have to beg and plead with him to have anything to do with his own child(ren). Don't you think you deserve better than that? You sound really young... You need to realize there's so much more to life than this kind of crap. There's just so much more...



Value yourself. Do yourself a favor and get away from these negative people. There are plenty of people and organizations that can help you out. You're in Dallas, yeah? I grew up in Rome. If you want I can look up some places that might help you out.

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Raptor Jesus:" Also, this guy sounds like an asshole. If he wants to be involved he'll get involved. You shouldn't have ... [snip!] ... can help you out. You're in Dallas, yeah? I grew up in Rome. If you want I can look up some places that might help you out."


I'll be 21 on the 7th and YES PLEASE that would be amazing you have no idea how much i'd appreciate that!

Derp Due January 10; 1 child; Camp Lejeune, NC, United States 11610 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Lumpy space princess:" I'll be 21 on the 7th and YES PLEASE that would be amazing you have no idea how much i'd appreciate that!"

Is Dallas in Paulding or Douglas county? Or what county?

Mamiii 3 kids; Dallas, Georgia 824 posts
31st Dec '12
Quoting Raptor Jesus:" Is Dallas in Paulding or Douglas county? Or what county?"


I live in Paulding County, in Dallas ga, If that even makes sense, but i know you get it.