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whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting Destinite:" Gotcha. I hope you didn't take offense. "


No not at all. It was just a rough night, I'd been off my meds, and work was stressful.

Donna Jo Tanner 1 child; Beach Haven, New Jersey 6440 posts
2nd Jan '13

Whenever the order is either completed and they feel the terms and consequences have been met or its just dropped all together you can be with him and there is nothing the social worker can do. But if you get with him while the order is still in place they can take action. Also if you trying to get the order dropped but are still holding to it she can't do anything. They can only do anything if you violate a CURRENT and IN PLACE order.



And I do believe that ppl make mistakes and sometimes the court gets involved when they shouldn't. I don't think just because you guys have made mistakes means you can't start over and donut better.



Good luck OP.

[JadeLee] 1 child; Minnesota 12190 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" She's saying after the court date we can't even get back together. I'm not going to change it to that, I want to get it dropped completely. "

Regardless you need to follow anything that is court ordered. They are trying to protect you and your daughter. Have you not ever seen Teen Mom where Catelyn's mom and butch end up in jail for violating their DO NOT CONTACT order. It is very serious and he can get more time if you do not follow it, and you ending up in jail can equal your child getting taken away because you are breakin the law and having her break the law at the same time.

whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting Jenna+1:" Whenever the order is either completed and they feel the terms and consequences have been met or its ... [snip!] ... shouldn't. I don't think just because you guys have made mistakes means you can't start over and donut better. Good luck OP."


Thank you. We're not violating anything, because I don't want him to get in more trouble. The way the lady made it sound on the phone is at any time if we decide to be together she'll take her away.

Donna Jo Tanner 1 child; Beach Haven, New Jersey 6440 posts
2nd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:</b>" Thank you. We're not violating anything, because I don't want him to get in more trouble. The way the lady made it sound on the phone is at any time if we decide to be together she'll take her away. "</blockquote>




Yeah no, if at any time the order is completed, dismissed/dropped you have every right to be together. She could try to make it hard on you like random CPS visits but if nothing is found and your LO is happy/ healthy they wouldn't do anything.

whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting [JadeLee]:" Regardless you need to follow anything that is court ordered. They are trying to protect you and your ... [snip!] ... in jail can equal your child getting taken away because you are breakin the law and having her break the law at the same time."


Neither one of us are speaking to the other.

InkDMomma 35 kids; Clinton Township, Michigan 27418 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" Thank you. We're not violating anything, because I don't want him to get in more trouble. The way the lady made it sound on the phone is at any time if we decide to be together she'll take her away. "


No it's only when you have a court order in place. You must have just misunderstood or she just might have been a b***h considering the situation.



You should be able to work on thing after everything has been dropped, just be careful the next time because that social worker might be out for your ass.

Destinite 1 child; 2 angel babies; Paradise, FL, United States 31442 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" No not at all. It was just a rough night, I'd been off my meds, and work was stressful. "


Shit happens and sometimes the people we love the most we lash out toward.



[JadeLee] 1 child; Minnesota 12190 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" Neither one of us are speaking to the other. "

Well you obviously want to. But they can keep no contact orders in place for years, as long as it is in place (look for an expiration date following the hearing) they can have just cause to take your child out of the harmful situation (regardless of weather she was there or not when it happened, they have to assume it could happen when she is there too. ) Like the above poster said CPS can get involved, and they will make it harder but eventually when there is no order then you can. She can't keep you from him for life.

whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting InkDMomma:" No it's only when you have a court order in place. You must have just misunderstood or she just might ... [snip!] ... on thing after everything has been dropped, just be careful the next time because that social worker might be out for your ass."


She is a b***h. She called me back to tell me not to be upset at her because she's telling me the truth. :roll:

Mrs Mia Wallace 33 kids; Georgia 2858 posts
2nd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:</b>" She didn't see or hear anything, she wasn't even here."</blockquote>
I'm not saying she was but it's something they may bring up in cases of future abuse. Kwim?
I do understand where you're coming from and that's something you need to address, if and when it arises.
If it does, I would get an excellent lawyer too.
Good luck!

Kelly+Brandon=Blake 1 child; Maryland 1260 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" I was really drunk, and so was he, we got into a fight, he fell out of the bed and thought I pushed ... [snip!] ... and thought I pushed him, and was screaming at me. Me being off my meds, and way too drunk, got scared and called the cops. "


Gotcha. Well IMO, if you truly knew he wouldn't of hurt you then you wouldn't have called the cops. You shouldn't be in a relationship if you're scared of the person you're in it with, IMO. I hope you guys work things out, sounds to me like you guys should stay seperated until this is over with and in the meantime...work on yourselves, both of you fix your personal issues to make sure nothing like this happens again. For youselves and your child, teach her that is not how relationships should be. Good luck!

whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting Kelly+Brandon=Blake:" Gotcha. Well IMO, if you truly knew he wouldn't of hurt you then you wouldn't have called the cops. ... [snip!] ... nothing like this happens again. For youselves and your child, teach her that is not how relationships should be. Good luck!"


After being off my meds for a week (which caused bigger issues than all this) and being so drunk I could barely stand, obviously I wasn't in my right mind when I called the cops. I was drunk and scared and obviously not thinking clearly. Otherwise I wouldn't have called.
Thank you.

Kelly+Brandon=Blake 1 child; Maryland 1260 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting whitney ♥ ainsley:" After being off my meds for a week (which caused bigger issues than all this) and being so drunk I could ... [snip!] ... I called the cops. I was drunk and scared and obviously not thinking clearly. Otherwise I wouldn't have called. Thank you. "


Sorry, your'e story just sounds like my old relationship...very unhealthy. Luckily, we didn't have any kids together. Idk if you're in denial or not but drunk or no meds is not an excuse. First of all, if you knew you weren't on your meds then you probably shouldn't have drank, dumb decision. Everyone is responsible for their own actions. If you guys have a great relationship that got out of hand, once, great! Think before you drink and if really have issues where you need to be on medication, get the shit taken care of. Put your daughter FIRST. Everything you guys do affects HER! So maybe you should reevaluate your relationship. And good thing she wasn't there, what would you have done if she WAS there?

whitney ♥ ainsley 1 child; New Hampshire 16454 posts
2nd Jan '13
Quoting Kelly+Brandon=Blake:" Sorry, your'e story just sounds like my old relationship...very unhealthy. Luckily, we didn't have any ... [snip!] ... So maybe you should reevaluate your relationship. And good thing she wasn't there, what would you have done if she WAS there?"


The pharmacy ran out of my meds, and I couldn't pick them up till the next day, and I should be allowed to drink once in 2 years, I'm an adult, and legally allowed to, I was responsible about it so it shouldn't matter.
My meds cause psych issues if I go off them, as in I attempted to kill myself because I was off them, and didn't know what I was doing.
I never drink, and I always stay on my meds, you can stop criticizing me like you know my life. My daughter always comes first.