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j0des(+2) 18 kids; Virginia 5095 posts
3rd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting the grace life:</b>" Well, our 4 year old has to earn cartoon time...so bad behavior = no earned cartoon time. We are also a spanking family when needed. "</blockquote>




Thats similar to what we are doing.



We are doing a reward chart for time intervals.. 1 sticker=5 minutes. We give stickers for him doing things without us asking him, using manners, sharing with his brother, cleaning up after himself or his brother, eating all of his dinner(he is a crazy picky eater), and whatever else we find to be good behavior.



We let him trade it in for the kindle or the psp usually..

*NicoleAmber* 3 kids; Bourbon, Missouri 792 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting j0des(+2):" <blockquote><b>Quoting the grace life:</b>" Well, our 4 year old has to earn cartoon ... [snip!] ... crazy picky eater), and whatever else we find to be good behavior. We let him trade it in for the kindle or the psp usually.."


I actually think I'm going to try doing that. My kids think that if they want to watch t.v. they get to watch it now, then it goes downhill until I give in. DH hates that I give in so easily which probably is a lot of the problem.

homes cool 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 60891 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting BareFootBabyMaker:" I understand completely, Sorry that I have no advice I even spank them sometimes and they get upset for ... [snip!] ... yesterday to clean his room with no luck...then DH comes home and is all "go clean your room NOW" 10 mins later its spotless "


That would infuriate me, and my husband. Both of you deserve to be respected.

BareFootBabyMaker Due May 30; 2 kids; Springfield, Missouri 850 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting the grace life:" That would infuriate me, and my husband. Both of you deserve to be respected. "



Oh, we don't like it but....idk what else to do
I try the reward system and this is how it goes
"I want to watch cartoons"
"ok, well, go clean your room and we'll watch cartoons"
"but, I don't want to watch cartoons now"
"go clean your room anyways"
then he goes to his room and plays :(

homes cool 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 60891 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting BareFootBabyMaker:" Oh, we don't like it but....idk what else to do I try the reward system and this is how it goes "I ... [snip!] ... watch cartoons" "but, I don't want to watch cartoons now" "go clean your room anyways" then he goes to his room and plays :("


Have you ever taken away everything? That's exactly what I'd do, and have done. I stripped my daughter's room of everything...and she got no cartoon time until she had earned her things back. Momma don't play. :wink:

j0des(+2) 18 kids; Virginia 5095 posts
3rd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting *NicoleAmber*:</b>" I actually think I'm going to try doing that. My kids think that if they want to watch t.v. they get ... [snip!] ... watch it now, then it goes downhill until I give in. DH hates that I give in so easily which probably is a lot of the problem. "</blockquote>



Seriously..whatever they LOVE..take it. Make them earn it. If they make bad choices, they live with them. If they make good choices..they get rewarded. I tell my son.."thats your choice, but you dont get any stickers."



It doesnt hurt that he loves stickers lol I let him pick out which ones he gets too. I get special ones sometimes(batman, spiderman,angrybirds)..but I usually get the teacher sticker sheets that cost a buck ha!



If they keep being super defiant though, Id go with your first initial reaction..taking toys and making them earn them back.



In a way its bribery..but its also structure.

j0des(+2) 18 kids; Virginia 5095 posts
3rd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting the grace life:</b>" Have you ever taken away everything? That's exactly what I'd do, and have done. I stripped my daughter's ... [snip!] ... my daughter's room of everything...and she got no cartoon time until she had earned her things back. Momma don't play. :wink:"</blockquote>



Me either! Kudos!

BareFootBabyMaker Due May 30; 2 kids; Springfield, Missouri 850 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting the grace life:" Have you ever taken away everything? That's exactly what I'd do, and have done. I stripped my daughter's ... [snip!] ... my daughter's room of everything...and she got no cartoon time until she had earned her things back. Momma don't play. :wink:"


NO, but I'm going to do that at nap time...he's gonna wake up to nothing lol.

homes cool 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 60891 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting BareFootBabyMaker:" NO, but I'm going to do that at nap time...he's gonna wake up to nothing lol."


I made my daughter help me pack it up. Oh my gosh, I'm mean. :D

homes cool 2 kids; 2 angel babies; Indiana 60891 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting j0des(+2):" <blockquote><b>Quoting the grace life:</b>" Have you ever taken away everything? ... [snip!] ... she got no cartoon time until she had earned her things back. Momma don't play. :wink:"</blockquote> Me either! Kudos!"


I mean, I don't want to raise little entitled brats...these cute little kids turn into adults who need to know how to behave.

*NicoleAmber* 3 kids; Bourbon, Missouri 792 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting j0des(+2):" <blockquote><b>Quoting *NicoleAmber*:</b>" I actually think I'm going to try doing ... [snip!] ... go with your first initial reaction..taking toys and making them earn them back. In a way its bribery..but its also structure."


I'm going to start doing that, they love their toys, so I gotta start being serious mean mommy from now on and showing them I'm the boss. I'll have them get their favorite ones at first to give to me and so on. Possibly be toyless by the time daddy gets home lol.

j0des(+2) 18 kids; Virginia 5095 posts
3rd Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting the grace life:</b>" I mean, I don't want to raise little entitled brats...these cute little kids turn into adults who need to know how to behave. "</blockquote>



So true. I mean, when you walk into our house you look around and its like disneyland threw up in here or something..but that would/will quickly change if these kids act like turds. My oldest was pretty much an angel his entire life..then, he turned 3. He became a defiant, bossy, crabby turd. lol You have to do something about it. While it is a "phase" its also an age they push all their limits to see what they can get away with. They are ridiculously smart, and evil.lol



Im scared of my youngest turning 3..he is already throwing tantrums at 11 months.. Im like WTH?

BareFootBabyMaker Due May 30; 2 kids; Springfield, Missouri 850 posts
3rd Jan '13

He just realized his Leappad is gone....his world has ended lol

Kenzie Doll. Due August 13; 1 child; Westerly, Rhode Island 11727 posts
3rd Jan '13

I put my almost four year old girl in the corner. I have her face the corner for 2 minutes. when it's over, she walks over, i tell her again why she was in a timeout, tell her i love her, and hug her. it usually works.

Diana plus 2 2 kids; Norfolk, Virginia 3576 posts
3rd Jan '13
Quoting BareFootBabyMaker:" I make him have 5 minutes of quiet time...but he gets happy and plays. Nothing works for me, My husband ... [snip!] ... can just have a "mean" voice and the kids jump and do whatever he says...with me they act like I'm joking all the time :("


omg, us too.
I was just telling my friend this tonight. When my their dad has them, they listen to him, goes to bed, clean up...no issues. He seriously does not know why I have such a hard time. :(