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Cast Your Vote:

    • Very very weird -- Votes: 103
    • Perfectly ok, she's trying to grieve -- Votes: 26
HopingforaMiracle 1 child; USA 22783 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Wolf Spirit:</b>" mmhmm exactly totally agree, it helps you move on to the next phase of grief its going to be hard regardless ... [snip!] ... things and not dwell not a day goes by I don't think of the ones I lost and thats ok because I know they are in a better place."</blockquote>




Exactly

Bettinas 2 kids; Australia 2204 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Kimber-lily:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Bettinas:</b>" I'm all for taking photos and being proud of ... [snip!] ... Facebook isn't the place for that type of photo.... :?"</blockquote> Why not? Facebook should be friends and family."</blockquote>




Because seeing dead babies can be upsetting to some people. I get really upset seeing photos of SO's nephew around SIL's house because it really hits home. I know that babies die and I know that everyone grieves in their own way. But I just don't think it's appropriate to play dress up with a tiny person who deserves respect. I mean, we've seen the comments on the picture so far. But who's to say that after those comments people didn't say she was disgusting and that the mother is a horrible person for dressing her like a doll? I just think that Facebook, where friends and family can see, isn't the place to publicly air all of your laundry.... Even though that's what people tend to do :?

P Pickle Pants 98 kids; California 20522 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Bettinas:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Kimber-lily:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Bettinas:</b>" ... [snip!] ... and family can see, isn't the place to publicly air all of your laundry.... Even though that's what people tend to do :?"</blockquote>




You don't like my profile pic? It disturbs you?



So she's not allowed to post a pic of her lost baby?



I get that seeing a mummified corpse is rough on people. I get that. I even get that lost babies are hard to look at. And I get that the way she is dealing (or not) is abnormal--- But FB has a "hide" button.

Loretta West [+1] Due March 26; TTC since May 2013; 1 child; Auckland, New Zealand 6029 posts
status 8th Jan '13

Seeing dead kids is hard on any mother. But seeing a picture of a preemie that's just passed is one thing.. seeing a mummified baby in a dolls dress is another. It's definitely not a healthy way to handle things, if she's keeping her daughters corpse and playing dress up with it :?

Loretta West [+1] Due March 26; TTC since May 2013; 1 child; Auckland, New Zealand 6029 posts
status 8th Jan '13

Also, don't you legally have to fill out a birth cert and properly dispose of the body after a certain gestation? Otherwise you can be charged with improperly disposing of human remains I believe

P Pickle Pants 98 kids; California 20522 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lucas'Mama:</b>" Also, don't you legally have to fill out a birth cert and properly dispose of the body after a certain gestation? Otherwise you can be charged with improperly disposing of human remains I believe"</blockquote>




This much is true. I have papers I have to keep with his ashes just to be able to possess them. Can't fly or cross state lines with the ashes otherwise!

Kiki's Mommy Due November 10 (girl); 1 child; Montana 3977 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Lucas'Mama:</b>" Seeing dead kids is hard on any mother. But seeing a picture of a preemie that's just passed is one thing.. ... [snip!] ... It's definitely not a healthy way to handle things, if she's keeping her daughters corpse and playing dress up with it :?"</blockquote>




Agreed.

Dovahkiin 1 child; 1 angel baby; Kentucky 16776 posts
8th Jan '13
Quoting Lucas'Mama:" Also, don't you legally have to fill out a birth cert and properly dispose of the body after a certain gestation? Otherwise you can be charged with improperly disposing of human remains I believe"


Maybe she had the baby at home and just never told anyone.

nursemaya mom to 3! 3 kids; 5 angel babies; Minnesota 16003 posts
8th Jan '13
Quoting Lucas'Mama:" Also, don't you legally have to fill out a birth cert and properly dispose of the body after a certain gestation? Otherwise you can be charged with improperly disposing of human remains I believe"


unless the baby was REALLY small for gestational age, I would guess this baby was born well before that I would guess 18 weeks, but I could be wrong

I'm actually a virgin Due June 9; 1 child; Oregon 18466 posts
8th Jan '13

I'm very confused.. not sure what to think. It looks like that baby has been go ne for a long while. My friend lost her son at 27 weeks and has photos other walls. He lived for two days and has those photos on her facebook. This seems like she isn't properly grieving.

Rob's Living Dead Girl Royersford, Pennsylvania 3347 posts
8th Jan '13
Quoting P.S I'm pregnant ♥1:" I'm very confused.. not sure what to think. It looks like that baby has been go ne for a long while. ... [snip!] ... photos other walls. He lived for two days and has those photos on her facebook. This seems like she isn't properly grieving."

No offense, but is there truly a 'proper' way to grieve?

I'm actually a virgin Due June 9; 1 child; Oregon 18466 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Stray:</b>" No offense, but is there truly a 'proper' way to grieve?"</blockquote>




No, but keeping a dead body is not healthy imo.

Rob's Living Dead Girl Royersford, Pennsylvania 3347 posts
8th Jan '13
Quoting P.S I'm pregnant ♥1:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Stray:</b>" No offense, but is there truly a 'proper' way to grieve?"</blockquote> No, but keeping a dead body is not healthy imo."


Is the woman this thread is talking about keeping the body? If yes, then I'll agree with you. I was reading through the thread trying to figure out if she was keeping the corpse or if she just wanted a photo of her child for remembrance or such.
It's just that I've had people berate the way one grieved before, and used the words 'correct' or 'proper' or such. It makes me feel like the person is saying that there's a right way to grieve, and anything outside this way is the wrong way to. Which isn't true whatsoever, to say the least. Again, I don't mean to offend you and I don't think you were saying/thinking this at all. It just unsettled me is all.
I apologize if I did read too much into your post. :/

Bettinas 2 kids; Australia 2204 posts
8th Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting P Pickle Pants:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Bettinas:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Kimber-lily:</b>" ... [snip!] ... that lost babies are hard to look at. And I get that the way she is dealing (or not) is abnormal--- But FB has a "hide" button."</blockquote>




It's a different situation here. This is a forum where hundreds of women gather and share feelings on these situations. A 12 year old isn't going to be scrolling through this site and see this picture. I just don't think it's appropriate for that type of situation :?

BubbleLush Due August 20; 1 child; United Kingdom 512 posts
8th Jan '13
Quoting Lucas'Mama:" Seeing dead kids is hard on any mother. But seeing a picture of a preemie that's just passed is one thing.. ... [snip!] ... It's definitely not a healthy way to handle things, if she's keeping her daughters corpse and playing dress up with it :?"


Ummm seeing dead children is hard on anyone not just mothers ...



that pic on this girls FB would disturb lots of people I think, hopefully she can get help but I also think people who have lost their children should be able to share their pics too it is just a tough situation because posting pics of dead babies on social sites is ummm



again disturbing to lots of people and can really hurt people



and be triggers for lots of people who just stumble onto something like that with no warning on here (a parenting site) you may expect something like that