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Seriously Mom :/ *long* Madi's*Mama Due November 2; 1 child; Holland, Michigan 7391 posts
9th Jan '13

So a little back story as to why I have resentment towards my mom. She is divorcing my stepdad (not a big deal) and has a new boyfriend that she met online (also not a big deal) but since Aug, my mom will spend every day she has off a work across the state with her boyfriend. My 2 younger brothers still live at home and they barely see her because when she is home she locks herself in the bathroom on the phone with her boyfriend. The first few times she went over there she asked me to babysit, and didn't leave any food in the house or juice (one of my brothers is diabetic so that's a big deal) it happened like 3 more times before my stepdad got back from out of town (for work) and started taking care of things again. Now, my mom works full time and has very little bills because she refuses to give my stepdad any money for the house (they still live together), won't buy food, nothing. She told my stepdad that she's not moving out until April when their divorce is final and she gets half his tax return. This holiday season was the first time none of us (I have a sister as well, both of us moved out though) have seen my mom since she was with her boyfriend. It's not as big a deal for me but for my brothers and sister it was. My sister's dad has always come in and out of her life, and tell her how worthless she is, but my mom has always been there for her and this year she wasn't. My siblings were crushed. A birthday tradition my mom has always done is makes us what we want for dinner and a cake but my sister asked me to do it for her this year, at our house because it's closer for her, she thought it would be less tense at our house, and knew my mom would flake. She still wants my mom, stepdad, and brothers, to be there for her birthday so like 2 months ago I told my mom that my sister wanted me to do her birthday dinner and wanted her there and I was telling her now so she didn't make plans.
I text her this morning to remind her that my sisters birthday is in 2 weeks and we all still really want to see her. She can't. She made plans with her boyfriend. Are you serious?! You wonder why I think you put this man before your kids. My sister wanted 1 normal thing. If you've seen past post I've ranted about my sister because she was partying and totally screwing up her life but she's really turning around. I'm very proud of her and I know it's something for her but it's not the same as her mom telling her that, or even seeing her mom. My sister spent Thanksgiving and Christmas bawling her eyes out that my mom wasn't there, it was the first time she wasn't with mom so she just wanted a normal birthday dinner. Hopefully I can still pull off a good birthday for her, even though it won't be the same :(

✰ Mrs. B ✰ 2 kids; Texas 2640 posts
9th Jan '13

Your mom does seem selfish and is obviously putting that guy first, you're right about all that. Sorry you and your siblings (especially the younger ones still at home) are experiencing this!

Madi's*Mama Due November 2; 1 child; Holland, Michigan 7391 posts
9th Jan '13
Quoting ✰ Mrs. B ✰:" Your mom does seem selfish and is obviously putting that guy first, you're right about all that. Sorry you and your siblings (especially the younger ones still at home) are experiencing this!"

Thanks. My mom refuses to acknowledge that she is. She says no one will ever come before us but I will never understand what she is going through. Really she's upset that I still involve my stepdad in my life. He's been apart of my life for 14 years, walked me down the aisle with my dad at my wedding, etc. I'm not going to cut him out and I told her that from the beginning.
My brothers are 15 and 10, it's really hard on them :(

Colt's mommy 1 child; Moore, Oklahoma 21324 posts
9th Jan '13

Sounds typical of an older women getting out of a marriage. It's sad that she can't see or doesn't care how it's affecting her children.

*B & D Mommy* Due January 19; 2 kids; Illinois 15946 posts
9th Jan '13

Yeah she is definitely putting her boyfriend first..not okay!! I would tell her exactly what I think about that situation if it were me.

Madi's*Mama Due November 2; 1 child; Holland, Michigan 7391 posts
9th Jan '13
Quoting *B & D Mommy*:" Yeah she is definitely putting her boyfriend first..not okay!! I would tell her exactly what I think about that situation if it were me. "

Oh i have. Many times lol She deleted and blocked me off facebook. I managed to have 1 conversation with her new bf on his fb and yes I asked a lot of questions, I was worried about my mom, so I asked if it freaked him out that she has 5 kids and a granddaughter. I was deleted and blocked from his the next day and my mom told me i'm not allowed to say she has 5 kids and a granddaughter.
I actually have barely talked to my mom since Aug because of this but I was going to put it all aside for my sister.

*B & D Mommy* Due January 19; 2 kids; Illinois 15946 posts
9th Jan '13
Quoting Madi's*Mama:" Oh i have. Many times lol She deleted and blocked me off facebook. I managed to have 1 conversation with ... [snip!] ... I actually have barely talked to my mom since Aug because of this but I was going to put it all aside for my sister. "


Oh wow..I couldn't even imagine lol. I'm sorry you are going through this!

Madi's*Mama Due November 2; 1 child; Holland, Michigan 7391 posts
9th Jan '13
Quoting *B & D Mommy*:" Oh wow..I couldn't even imagine lol. I'm sorry you are going through this!"

thanks. I'm lucky and have my own family to keep me occupied but my poor brothers are in the house with them. That's gotta suck.

*B & D Mommy* Due January 19; 2 kids; Illinois 15946 posts
9th Jan '13
Quoting Madi's*Mama:" thanks. I'm lucky and have my own family to keep me occupied but my poor brothers are in the house with them. That's gotta suck. "


Yeah I imagine it would!