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He's lucky I've changed. *Rant* Vodka Knockers 1 child; North Carolina 8063 posts
11th Jan '13

So, BD has been stressing me out just a wee bit since two nights ago. Basically I completely cut ties with him in November because it was too stressful, he wasn't interested in being a father, he refused to pay child support, and his girlfriend was starting unnecessary drama and I just couldn't deal with it, there was no reason for me to since he had no interest in seeing LO.
Since two nights ago I've had to console his parents when they've came to me upset because he said he's moving to Europe so he doesn't have to pay child support, he's terminating his rights for the same reason, he's not ever going to pay child support, they can't arrest him if they can't find him, and he's not showing up to court Monday (Child Support, LOL).
I've seriously been stoic about the entire deal. It's hurt my feelings a little here and there, but if he sincerely wants to move to Europe, I hope it makes him happy. As far as the child support goes, there's no reason to be upset. He can think what he wants but what it boils down to is they will eventually get him. They've done it once already and it resulted in his $1,309 cash bail which was given to me.
But then, he has his mom call me since he doesn't have my number anymore and won't be getting it. Apparently he tried to have Monday's court date continued, they denied it, so now he's wanting me to drive an hour to meet him, pick him up, let him sleep on my couch, take him to court, and then take him back to where I picked him up.
Lol no...For one, I've been battling the flu since Tuesday. Secondly, I can't even drive my car right now. I hit a deer doing 60 in August and it threw the front end out of alignment and ate up my tires, so now it's being worked on. I have no clue when it'll be ready. And lastly, he's been nothing but a jerk to me. I seriously don't hate him, and I don't harbor negative feelings towards him anymore. I worked through all that. If he actually wanted to be a part of LO's life, I'd let him no problem, but he doesn't, so why should I help him? He's not my friend.
I'm just going to straight up say no dice, and explain that when you act respectfully towards people, they're more willing to help you when you need it. But he's damn lucky I worked through all that rage I had pent up, the old me would have said "YEAH SURE!" and ran him over in the parking lot, threw that b***h in reverse and hit him again lmfao.
Ah, end rant peacefully and happy.

☮Sugar Magnolia 1 child; Indiana 18298 posts
11th Jan '13

i hope I get to that point with my BD, because at the moment, I just want to fill a pillowcase full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of him.

Vodka Knockers 1 child; North Carolina 8063 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" i hope I get to that point with my BD, because at the moment, I just want to fill a pillowcase full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of him."

Oh it took me a while, and anger management lol.
But when his parents tricked him (Long story) into seeing LO and he just completely shat on that kid the entire time, I watched him. I watched the way he acted, his body language, the way he looked at LO and realized that it wasn't me, and it wasn't my son. He just wasn't a dad and expecting him to be one was like him expecting me to be something I'm not.

Tiff Dodson Due March 26 (girl); Gilmer, Texas 236 posts
11th Jan '13

lol so he thinks moving away he dont have to pay for his child? i beileve he still does sounds like he still needs to grow up and be a man he made a child if he signed papers saying he is the father then yes he has to pay for the child and his girl friend needs to grow up as well and stop with all the drama they are both adults they need to start acting like it you did a good thing by cutting ties with him because he dont care for the LO and no child should have to have a man in thier life that dont want to be a father to them! good luck to you hope he maybe wises up and sees the light.

pitbullprincess Due June 24 (girl); 65 kids; Fayetteville, North Carolina 1295 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting Vodka Knockers:" So, BD has been stressing me out just a wee bit since two nights ago. Basically I completely cut ties ... [snip!] ... and ran him over in the parking lot, threw that b***h in reverse and hit him again lmfao. Ah, end rant peacefully and happy."


I hope you stay with this new you
you are not his taxi
you are not his bank
you are not his extra parent
he doesent help with LO
f**k him
He needs to leave you alone unless its to arrange visitation with that baby on your terms unless court has it otherwise
His parents need to understand this and be his parents since he still acts like a child and know they have a grandchild as well
...if you have any proof the bastard even says he is gonna leave which clearly he isnt looking at his finances lol take it court this includes txts
you have a baby you are clearly trying to take care of and be fair to everyone
its time for people to be fair to you even if it has to be court mandated
I see so many bad baby mammas and it just hurts me when I see good ones like you trying to do the right thing

Vodka Knockers 1 child; North Carolina 8063 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting Tiff Dodson:" lol so he thinks moving away he dont have to pay for his child? i beileve he still does sounds like he ... [snip!] ... to have a man in thier life that dont want to be a father to them! good luck to you hope he maybe wises up and sees the light."

Lol, thanks. But honestly I don't see him changing though, that's just the person he is. And the person I am doesn't associate with people like him lol.
When I told my mom about it, I said "You know, I don't hate him, but I also don't want to be in the same car as him." lmao.

CurlyDimpledLunatic! Due December 11 (girl); 2 kids; North Dakota 13756 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" i hope I get to that point with my BD, because at the moment, I just want to fill a pillowcase full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of him."


good step brothers reference. :D




Also, OP, you have a lot of strength, I don't know that I would be in the same place as you if anything like that were to ever happen between my husband (the father of my kids) and I.... good for you. Major props, kudos... all that.

Vodka Knockers 1 child; North Carolina 8063 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting pitbullprincess:" I hope you stay with this new you you are not his taxi you are not his bank you are not his extra parent ... [snip!] ... court mandated I see so many bad baby mammas and it just hurts me when I see good ones like you trying to do the right thing "

It's been one of those situations where we've had a lot of trial and errors, but this has worked best for all of us thus far. Me and him aren't talking so the girlfriend is happy, BD isn't expected to be a father so he's happy, I don't have to deal with either of them so I'm happy, and the grandparents are happy because they will always be able to see LO regardless of what goes on between me and BD.
The only regret I have about the current situation is he picked a really crummy time to do all this, since as of today the guy that is in charge of LO's developmental therapies is talking about the possibility of him having Autism and I'm trying to adjust to the idea.

Vodka Knockers 1 child; North Carolina 8063 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting CurlyDimpledLunatic!:" good step brothers reference. :D Also, OP, you have a lot of strength, I don't know that I would ... [snip!] ... that were to ever happen between my husband (the father of my kids) and I.... good for you. Major props, kudos... all that. "

I'm pretty proud of myself lol. I've been working really hard on changing a lot of aspects of my life, as well as my attitude and I've made some pretty awesome progress.
I guess I finally just got tired of being mad all of the time. I'm a lot happier now, just naturally. Wake up and feel good before my feet hit the floor.

pitbullprincess Due June 24 (girl); 65 kids; Fayetteville, North Carolina 1295 posts
11th Jan '13
Quoting Vodka Knockers:" It's been one of those situations where we've had a lot of trial and errors, but this has worked best ... [snip!] ... of LO's developmental therapies is talking about the possibility of him having Autism and I'm trying to adjust to the idea."


then its better BD and any other unstable person is out of the picture