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Barfy McVomitron Due July 19; 4 kids; Glen Burnie, Maryland 29256 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting J+D=4:" ROFLMAO>>> I am dying here..."


I was laughing so hard I was crying. it was hilarious. man, I'm glad I'm married to him...anyone else might have been very upset

lacTAYtor. ☮ 3 kids; North Carolina 4496 posts
21st Jan '13

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mommy of a giggler!:</b>" (he'd kill me if he knew I put this on here lol) We made a deal - he gives me an ACTUAL massage, like ... [snip!] ... trying to be sexy, or that he admitted to just putting on random underwear that he found, not knowing where they came from lol"</blockquote>



OH MY GOSH!! Seriously. I am DYING. That is hilarious!!

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Tiger Lily ♥:" Bahahahaha. Whenever DH pulls all the way out and goes back in, air goes in.....So when I stand up, the most horrible sound comes out. It's not awkward for either of us, but it's f**king hilarious."


same happens to me. I'm not embarrassed anymore..

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13

another one that I don't think is too embarrassing now, but back them I was mortified:



when we were 16, having sex on hubby's leather couch (the den was made into his bedroom, and there were no doors), we are getting into it and out of nowhere my MIL pops up and asks if I am hungry for anything other than her son... WTF?! "Ummm... no, thanks..."

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Barfy McVomitron:" I was laughing so hard I was crying. it was hilarious. man, I'm glad I'm married to him...anyone else might have been very upset"


yeah I told hubby yours and he said "I love you, but I'd probably punch you in the face.. or at least stay the hell away from your ass..."

Soon 2B Mom of 2 2 kids; North Highlands, California 3785 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting J+D=4:" another one that I don't think is too embarrassing now, but back them I was mortified: when we were ... [snip!] ... it and out of nowhere my MIL pops up and asks if I am hungry for anything other than her son... WTF?! "Ummm... no, thanks...""


:shock: Well thats pretty odd lol. I dont know how I would've responded to that one.

UhmAmber 1 child; Texas 2415 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting J+D=4:" another one that I don't think is too embarrassing now, but back them I was mortified: when we were ... [snip!] ... it and out of nowhere my MIL pops up and asks if I am hungry for anything other than her son... WTF?! "Ummm... no, thanks...""


omg, I would've been mortified.



I remember when SO and I were 15, I was giving him head on the couch upstairs and after I had finished I remember his mom walking out of her room behind us, I wasn't sure if she had been in there the whole time or had walked by during the process and neither of us noticed.

IDGAF ❤ 1 child; San Diego, CA, United States 30604 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Kimber's Mommy:" having sex right after high school graduation with my then boyfriend. at my parents' house, in my room. ... [snip!] ... channel." THEN... the most horrible sex ever occured, i faked my first orgasm, then lied about how good it was. lmao."


Lmaooo....reminds me of how this dude told me he was going to "beat it up" and then whipped out the smallest dick I ever saw lmfao!! :lol::lol:

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Soon 2B Mom of 2:" :shock: Well thats pretty odd lol. I dont know how I would've responded to that one."


yeah she was really not a maternal figure when he was growing up. she's better now that she's grandma.. but yeah... awkward...

UhmAmber 1 child; Texas 2415 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting ❥ Meℓi:" Lmaooo....reminds me of how this dude told me he was going to "beat it up" and then whipped out the smallest dick I ever saw lmfao!! :lol::lol:"


:lol::lol:
I hate that expression, "beat it up"

Barfy McVomitron Due July 19; 4 kids; Glen Burnie, Maryland 29256 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting J+D=4:" yeah I told hubby yours and he said "I love you, but I'd probably punch you in the face.. or at least stay the hell away from your ass...""


in my defense, I told him I was sick, not to move me around...he didn't listen. lol

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting ❥ Meℓi:" Lmaooo....reminds me of how this dude told me he was going to "beat it up" and then whipped out the smallest dick I ever saw lmfao!! :lol::lol:"


hahahaha makes me feel bad for him...

J+D=4 4 kids; Beverly Hills, California 14683 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Barfy McVomitron:" in my defense, I told him I was sick, not to move me around...he didn't listen. lol "


hubby said "eh, fair point..."

Turtley Mikey Due October 31; 2 kids; California 50611 posts
21st Jan '13

Only one I can think of at the top of my head are one time me and three friends and I went to the pier. One guy I had know since 5th grade and we just graduated and I really liked him. We end up f**king on the picnic table, and ended up on the ground.. Our other friends were like..Walking around the pier and showed up during our romp and were like Umm., and just walked away..haha.




Another was with DH and me.. We weren't married yet. But we were messing around and he hadn't had sex in like 7 years... He said he just wanted to stick it in for a minute ( no idea why) , but he only had it in for like not even a minute and I got off. I don't know if I was just so super horny or what but it was embarrassing..




Oh, and queefing is the worst..lol

IDGAF ❤ 1 child; San Diego, CA, United States 30604 posts
21st Jan '13
Quoting Devil's Advocate:" Right after sex, while I was peeing, DH let out the most raunchy fart ever and said "that could've been ... [snip!] ... could've been bad, I've been holding it the whole time." Then I farted while peeing and he says "We were made for each other.""

Hahahahahahaha